Boyfriend disclosed he visited a prostitute in India one year before we got together

DUTR

Confused5 wrote: »

Are you seriously reducing a relationship to sex? Not sure what to say about your brother's choices.

Nope, but there was an old saying that blokes are in a relationship for sex and women have sex for a relationship. My brother paid good money for the suits, as others have pointed out the cost of living and labour can be very different to here in the UK. The pro thing is a seperate issue, I'm not sure why folk are harbouring about having an STI, even film industry workers have to have regular checks.
I can comfortably say that I have not visited a pro, but then the ones I have seen on the streets don't appeal even if they were offering it for free.
Let's turn the question the other way from your thread what would the responses be like or more so what would you say to the male poster that posted 'My GF admitted to me that years ago she worked in the industry' ?
Sometimes you can't dwell on a past, perhaps your BF should have just kept quiet about it, after all some highly paid footballers have visited sex workers and they are still appearingly happily married or went on to get married.

whitewing

It would be a deal breaker for me.

TBeckett100

Confused5 wrote: »

Again, really unkind.

What is unkind is that your boyfriend slept with someone in an impoverished society because it was cheap as chapatis, and despite risking his own health (I doubt he had a test afterwards) he then slept with you for however long before dropping the bombshell.

It takes something to go to a prostitue in the first place. Men who go to them fall into two categories, those who can't get it free on demand or those who have a penchant for a certain something that they can't ask for at home.

Confused5

whitewing wrote: »

It would be a deal breaker for me.

Sorry, but I'd like to know more about why you feel it's a dealbreaker?

TBeckett100

Confused5 wrote: »

Sorry, but I'd like to know more about why you feel it's a dealbreaker?

For precisely the same nagging doubt that caused you to set up a new account under the name 'confused' and seek advice.

jaydeeuk1

Tell him to post it on hotukdeals. Should make deal of the day.

If it offends your moral compass, get shot of him. I'd never go out with a girl who was a druggie, smoker or a louis Spence fan.

TBeckett100

Also at the same time he was pursuing you for a long distance relationship, he had a choice. Either he could be genuine with his feelings (actions speak louder than words) and wait for you or try to set up a relationship for when he got home but at the same time sleeping with a prostitute.

If someone was trying to talk me into a relationship, I'm not sure I'd be comfortable in that persons genuinity if they were engaging with others.

Anyway, until this blows over, I wouldn't let him order any more Indian takeaways

whitewing

Firstly, he didn't tell you before he slept with you.

Secondly, I can't stand the way that men in general talk about prostitutes in general.

Thirdly, I don't know anyone that would not hit the roof if their daughter became a prostitute.

But sex for me requires an emotional connection; I know it can be different for men (and some women).

DUTR

TBeckett100 wrote: »

Also at the same time he was pursuing you for a long distance relationship, he had a choice. Either he could be genuine with his feelings (actions speak louder than words) and wait for you or try to set up a relationship for when he got home but at the same time sleeping with a prostitute.

If someone was trying to talk me into a relationship, I'm not sure I'd be comfortable in that persons genuinity if they were engaging with others.

Anyway, until this blows over, I wouldn't let him order any more Indian takeaways

That is the crunch phrase for me often on this board, I guess nothing is over until she says it's over .

TBeckett100

It may be over tomorrow when OP unwraps her Christmas present and finds an Indian headscarf