What would be fair amount for a 21 year old to pay?

victory

girlycara wrote: »

trust me, don't worry about my finances. I am appauled that people could profit from their kids

You really are ........... Impossible:eek:

springdreams

OP in my view £300pcm is extremely reasonable.

I also agree with the posters who say you should stop doing his laundry, and stop buying his toiletries, and he needs to start helping out with household chores. It is definitely time he joined the adult world.

Your job as a mother is to now teach him to be a responsible partner / husband by helping out around the house, and how to manage his money by getting him to pay a realistic contribution towards his living costs.

Good luck

Bennifred

girlycara wrote: »

trust me, don't worry about my finances. I am appauled that people could profit from their kids

:eek: Did you say you are a teacher?!

GobbledyGook

My 3 year old helps out around the house. There are two chores he considers "his" (although obviously at the moment if he forgets about them there's no consequence - even I'm not that mean!). My girls (both primary school) have jobs they are expected to do.

I know that's not what you asked for opinions on, but in mine he's lucky he's not being given a £50 increase and a list of jobs!!

ess0two

girlycara wrote: »

trust me, don't worry about my finances. I am appauled that people could profit from their kids

Don't entertain the troll.

krlyr

girlycara wrote: »

rubbish, of course they do. 31k is not a life of riley style salary with the cost of living today, and because he earns at a young age you as a parent would punish him? what rubbish

A £31k salary could run my household/pay my mortgage on its own - and I live in the South East, so not somewhere that cheap!

I was earning half that when I lived at home and giving my mum £300 in housekeeping, with no objection at all. I could see first-hand what my money went on - partly because I would help with the food shopping, help with the housework, I saw the bills, I was quite aware what my contribution paid for.

Out of interest, what age do you think children become financially independant? I assume you don't expect your parents to contribute to your mortgage/bills..would you expect OP to pay her son's rent if he moved out? If not, what is wrong with wrong with putting a price on what it costs them - not just in bills, but the time and effort of washing up, shopping for him and so on?

meer53

girlycara wrote: »

god i cant believe some peoples attitudes.

I will never take money from my kids. never, in a million years.

I don't really think you should have children. Most people on here don't believe your attitude.

If my children ever thought that they should live with me and not contribute towards our living costs, i'd feel as though i'd failed as a parent.

My job is to bring them up to have consideration for others and not to be selfish. It doesn't matter whether i need the money or not, they should still offer it. My son paid when he was at home and my daughter will when she gets a job, i won't have to ask.

Person_one

meer53 wrote: »

I don't really think you should have children. Most people on here don't believe your attitude.

If my children ever thought that they should live with me and not contribute towards our living costs, i'd feel as though i'd failed as a parent.

My job is to bring them up to have consideration for others and not to be selfish. It doesn't matter whether i need the money or not, they should still offer it. My son paid when he was at home and my daughter will when she gets a job, i won't have to ask.

Plenty of parents can easily afford to let their children live at home for nothing or next to nothing, and in doing so give them a huge boost towards buying their own home. With the average age of first time buyers somewhere around 37 I believe, I wouldn't be so quick to judge those families as 'failures'.

Georgiegirl256

Person_one wrote: »

Plenty of parents can easily afford to let their children live at home for nothing or next to nothing, and in doing so give them a huge boost towards buying their own home. With the average age of first time buyers somewhere around 37 I believe, I wouldn't be so quick to judge those families as 'failures'.

Very well said. :T

KiKi

Cloudydaze wrote: »

But paying for a third of household outgoings is not the same as covering the actual cost of him living there.

I do see the 'maths' in that - but at the same time it's a bit of a fallacy.

The actual cost to having an *additional* adult - compared to one or two adults - might be absolutely minimal in real terms. But that's because that particular view sees him as 'additional'. I don't see him as additional, because he's an adult who is earning very good money.

You wouldn't have a houseshare of two people, then increase it to three and not charge them a third of bills. And to me, this is the same situation.

Otherwise, what's to say that's the same for anyone else who lives there The bills would be pretty much the same if the OP left, so why should she pay anything at all? Just leave it to the son and her OH.

To me, three people are in the house, and they all are all adults, and one earns very well. I know it's not a houseshare scenario, but given the financial circumstances, I think it's fair to split equally. Not to see the son as an 'addition' to the house who only pays the costs that he specifically incurs.

And, he should do his own chores and washing. End of!