What would you contribute?

CH27

victory wrote: »

Love I think:rotfl:being together she wants to show him off:rotfl::D

I wouldn't be contributing to them having a big blow out for no reason.
I think the cheeky moo has got a nerve asking you :eek:
Tell her you can't afford it.

victory

Artytarty wrote: »

Afraid so! You wouldn't fell good about just saying no, would you?
Or you could offer to pay for their meal?

GF and sons?

victory

CH27 wrote: »

I wouldn't be contributing to them having a big blow out for no reason.
I think the cheeky moo has got a nerve asking you :eek:
Tell her you can't afford it.

She wants to celebrate being in love with him from what I understand:D

CH27

victory wrote: »

She wants to celebrate being in love with him from what I understand:D

Well she can pay for it then.

victory

caeler wrote: »

Pick up the phone and discuss it. Only then will you find out what is going on, what she needs and how much of a contribution she is expecting.

Is this a surprise birthday party? A big birthday? I find it strange that anybody would start arranging such a big event without thinking how they would fund it!

EDIT: Just seen your comment about 'a party to celebrate their love'. Sounds very odd to me, unless it is a surprise engagement party!?

She's asking him? Wow never thought of that.

She did say a few of their friends are moving for work, so wants everyone in one place, last time for some that kind of thing

claire16c

This seems a bit odd to have such a massive party when it's not his birthday? Hiring a hall and everything? Can't they just go to the restaurant and then go to a bar in fancy dress? Or are they under age.

I'd say you'll help out with the fancy dress & leave it at that.

I'd be really embarrassed if someone threw me a party for no occasion!

I don't think there's anything wrong with people paying for their own meal that's usual at stuff like birthdays in restaurants.

But seems like she's going ott. I'd say ill help with the outfit & when it's his birthday ill help with something more special then.

victory

CH27 wrote: »

Well she can pay for it then.

She's just texted again with prices, venues, fancy dress ideas etc etc i keep stalling texting exact contribution as OH is driving back from work so he's not aware yet

victory

michelle2008 wrote: »

The rule of etiquette is the host of a party should pay. If she is inviting people to a party she should not expect them to pay for their food.

If she cannot afford to throw this party, she should be encouraged to amend her plans to something within her means - a buffet in a hired hall perhaps.

You could offer to bring some dishes - however this is a party to celebrate her relationship with your son. It is not your responsibility to finance any of it - particularly as you don't even know if your son wants the party.

I think it's teenagers, they have a different mind to us:rotfl: from what I have te ted her with cheaper ideas etc she says well no, what I thought was, well I know son loves x venue, x club if I combine the 2 it will be a night to remember etc

claire16c

It would be cheaper & easier to go to a club as everyone will pay their own way. Hiring a hall & a Dj seems like a massive waste of money.

victory

Lunar_Eclipse wrote: »

Hmm, my personal view is that the celebration sounds a little excessive. I would have thought the dinner or the party would be better, especially since it sounds as if she can't afford both by asking for financial contributions.

I honestly don't know what I would do in this situation, except that I would ideally want to discuss it face to face. If this isn't possible, a telephone conversation would have to do.

Ultimately, there is no right or wrong here, so it depends on what you can afford and whether you're happy to contribute. I would not be sending such messages/requests to either my parents or my inlaws though! If she wants to do these things, why doesn't she just pay for it? If she can't afford it, then I suggest she rethinks the plans.

She's at uni so can't face to face, texting like a teenager possessed to me today, I'm getting the impression I am being counter acted at every suggestion, idea etc i know that's what I can't get past, why ask me?:eek: