Child stealing food, now needs to lose weight - anyone else been in this situation?

blue_monkey_2

Thank you, I used the word diet but it is just a word for a way of eating IMO. I think SW promotes a healthy eating plan and educates into what is in foods, how to make meals healthier and makes you think before eating them. No food is off limits but it makes you think about the healthier choices available to eat, and what things to put into foods to fill the meal out and make them better for you.

I am not obsessed by dieting, however, I am determined to adapt a healthier way of living and want to educate my children on that. Short of following my husband to work and telling him what to eat, he has to be the one that makes that desicion. My clothes stopped fitting me so I realised I either bought the next size up, or adopted a new way of life and lost the weight I had put on - the family can also take part in this 'diet' because it is just healthy food with not too much of certain things such as bread. I have not used salt in meals for a very long time but I have substituted some ingredients for ones that are better for you.

blue_monkey_2

Buttons, now she will have a cereal bar after school and then some fruit. She then has a sandwich, crisps (if she has been active, gym, or PE for example) and as many yogurts/fruit as she likes. She will sometimes have rice pudding or a baby bell. If we have pasta she will have that and not a sandwich.

The issue is not what she eats now as such, but more what she WAS eating has caused her weight to rocket. I need to limit the higher fat foods (and yes, these do include cheese and full fat yogurts) so she does not put weight on. I am happy for her to stay the same while she grows but to do that I need to ensure she does not eat too much of the bad stuff.

adouglasmhor

A lot of cereal bars are horendous by the way. Full of sugar/ hf corn syrup.

rosie383

BlueMonkey I just want to say,after reading through a lot of this thread, that it sounds like you are doing everything right as much as you can.
There are always going to be people around who love to give their opinion and are convinced that their way is the only way.

You sound like a great Mum. More power to yer elbow , as they say in Norn Iron!!!

LittleMissAspie

blue_monkey wrote: »

how many of you would tell your husband to stop nicking the biscuits though?

Me! I complained to my boyfriend last night because he ate too much spinach, the pack was supposed to last two meals and he used it all for one meal, it was a 1kg pack. This is why we are always over our food budget.

blue_monkey wrote:

I need to limit the higher fat foods (and yes, these do include cheese and full fat yogurts) so she does not put weight on.

No you don't, fat and protein are filling. Cereal bars, crisps, low fat yogurt, fruit, pasta, none of that is satisfying. Cut out all the sugar and give her meat, lentils, beans, eggs and loads of veg. If she is hungry between meals give her nuts. When her blood sugar is stable she will lose the urge to eat junk.

victory

I am insulin dependent diabetic and when first got diagnosed spent ages looking at the back of packets to see the sugar content, even things like special K that they so heavily advertise at this time of year is so high in sugar has been discussed by top nutritionalist not to have for breakfast, those cereal bars that are said to be healthy because they contain raisins or nuts the sugar content is so ridiculously high you may as well spoon sugar into your mouth...

Oxtail soup has sugar in, low fat crisps, low fat biscuits, some of the yogs that say low in fat have got more sugar in them to balance out the flavour that I cannot eat, the corner muller yogs that you tip the side into the yog are a no no sugar wise, the list of sugars in food items goes on and on....

My kids used to have all the advertised on tele must have morning cereals like choco pops or frosted whatever and they are all never bought anymore, we have shreddies, bran flakes, weetabix, porridge or shredded wheat in this house, lunch even some breads are high in sugars as is some meats that have been basted in honey or brown sugar so I look out for WW ones or ones that are lean, dinner is def veg all sorts of veg, piled high and little carbs and meat, lean meat not swimming in a high sugar bought sauce.

We eat a lot of eggs, poached, boiled never fried and turkey rashers from WW and low in fat and sugars WW beans, we also eat loads of lentils easy to add to spag bog and add carrots to it also, lots of pulses, all kinds add to cottage pie (make the topping with swede and carrot not pots and it is even nicer) peas, green beans, tomatoes eat loads of them.

Snacks any fruit you like, melon is a ab fav here and bananas everyone has turned into monkey we have eaten so many:rotfl:

No added sugar choc mousse angel delight, or sugar free jelly with fresh fruit for dessert or snack, no crisps, sometimes though those sunburst ones, almonds as snacks high is pick me ups, never cook in oils, I lost 7 and a half stone that way and now am much healthier and feel so much better.:D

Spendless

blue-monkey. My kids school has their meal plan on the council website. It's on a 3 week rota and from time to time the also invite parents to go stay for school dinner with their child. They change £2-£3 IIRC. If you have a look at yours you might see if the meal plans are also on-line and if you would ever get chance to go and have a lunch-time meal with your DD.

As regards is her behaviour 'normal' for someone her age. I've got an 8 3/4yo who is 'young' for her age eg this time last year she still liked Dora The explorer and has in the past scribbled on walls and dolls-not to the extent you describe - but not in recent years has she done this more of a toddler/nursery age thing.

We had an issue about 18 months ago with DS suddenly putting on a lot of weight. We watched what he ate a lot more and he also increased exercise. DS started ice-skating. I understand this is difficult with your son, but would she be able to go if another friend was going with their parent ditto swimming, even if it's not every week, would someone be able to help you out?

peachyprice

blue_monkey wrote: »

Another example, I have - in the past - removed all make up from my DD that she gets as presents as she plasters it all over her bedroom and toys. This Xmas someone gave her some loose powder eye shadow and someone else lipgloss, I explained to her that it was for occasional wearing in her face and she has been putting some on (and we have been having to adjust the coco the clown look delicately'ooh, it's a bit smudged, let me wipe that bit off', LOL). This morning I have gone into her bedroom and all of her new toys are covered in eyeshadow, lipgloss over the furniture and walls. It is everywhere. I have told her to clean it off, and she has, and now the make up has been removed from her again but her new toys are ruined. She draws on walls and furniture.

For, whatever reason, she cannot follow what should be simple instructions despite being very intelligent otherwise. Is it normal for a 9 year old to be drawing on walls and furniture despite being told not to and having been punished for it on many occasions. I've even tried throwing away the damaged drawn on toys (baby anabelle had the Isle of Man drawn on her head and her my little pony toys were drawn on as well!!) but that made no difference either. She has no respect for the boundaries that are put in place - either that or she does not understand them.

Buy why does this annoy you so much?

The walls, yes I can understand, furniture in her bedroom, although annoying, it's in her bedroom, my DD has a desk that she scribbled on in permament marker, she wishes she hadn't but has to live with that, it's her desk that is ruined.

As for the toys, they're her toys, why does it annoy you that she puts her make-up on them or draws on them? Surely she can do what she wants to them? Do you not think perhaps by taking away her things because she's done what she wanted to them you are buliding up unnecessary resentment towards you?

puddy

perhaps attention is the wrong word, but there appears some bigger behavioural issue here rather than just 'food'. her needs need to be assessed somehow as something is not right. she may be getting 'attention' and mum trying to interact but somehow its not working for the child. whether that is related to the binging and cravings is not clear at the moment, thats why the family may need more help.

i picked up on the 'salt free' because that is the terminology the OP used later in a post. i dont think its suitable for children to eat processed foods and have salt added to their diet but neither is totally salt free healthy as salt is a mineral that we all need. i may have misunderstood the post and thought that the child was being encouraged to have zero salt in her diet which of course is not healthy.

for what its worth, i also was put on a first diet when i was 8. i feel it has ruined my relationship with food. and no, i dont believe there are 'good and bad' foods, we really need to move away from this.

i cant remember now which post it was, but someone said that the bad foods have to be limited and 'good' foods can be eaten freely, in my opinion this is why slimming world is not a healthy eating plan because its premise is that some foods can be eaten infinately. we should not be eating ANYTHING with complete abandon, this is the actions of someone with food addiction and why i believe many (including myself years ago) are attracted to slimming world because it meets our need to eat something, anything, without limit. that is not healthy emotionally, let alone physically.

FatVonD

OP, I don't know if it is the same n all areas but my GP referred my son to a group that meets twice a week for 2 hours each time, the first hour is spent learning about eating healthily and the second hour is spent playing games (eg parachute games) that involve a bit of running around.