My eldest has changed his xmas list

Peater

I think you need to send him out to work and tell him to man-the-hell-up.

Just sayin.

dirtysexymonkey

neverdespairgirl wrote: »

Probably. It was like that with those I knew as a child, though. Both my friends' parents, and my parents' friends' children.

absolutely, but you sound as if you came from a very different environment to the one the ops son comes from. and its a different time, which is a very important factor.

in the time you were talking about computers werent used that much in households or education for that matter, but now its very different. computers are almost everything. thats not to say the ops son should be given a computer, just that its understandable that he may actually need one depending on his education/employment choices etc.

~Chameleon~

victory wrote: »

I think anyone reading this thread and the others can see clearly he deserves nothing, a slap, he deserves to be thrown on the streets, he deserves to have a short sharp take on reality, every single priveldge should be taken away from him, he is

And this is exactly where you're going wrong! Until you can all sit down and behave like adults rather than play tit-for-tat then you're going to continue to go around in circles, hurting each other. To be honest I think your son would be far better off living at his GF's.

Caroline_a

victory wrote: »

You see thatis what I cannotfor the life of me understand how can a teenager that is given money my money, my OH money that he worked hard for and is happy willingly giving it over to a teenater who is saying to us that is not enough? That I want more? That I expect more? Why?

So then I go loopy and take the whole lot off him, go on that he is ungrateful, who does he think he is? Etc and catch 22 goes around again

We do this all the time the kitchen board, deduct x for this attitude and y for that he huffs and hates it it goes back to normal he realises we stand by it he looses out he hates it we go back to normal...

The thing is honestly answer this question regardless of the laptop if we are offering x amount of money and he says not enough would you not want to punch him and take every last penny off him?

Sure we both do and we do and we have but from that he never learns and goes back to being a demander again

No. What I would do is when he demands something, don't get cross, just ignore. And do what I was originally going to do, ie whatever present he was getting he still gets, etc. I wouldn't fret over him changing his mind.

I'm also not sure about the deducting of money for 'attitude'. He knows how to behave, you said so yourself. So give him a little respect and when he behaves well be sociable and friendly, and when he doesnt ignore him and leave him out of things. I do think you are trying to be a bit controlling with him, and we all know that if you try to control teenagers they go in totally the opposite direction....

victory

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victory

Peater wrote: »

I think you need to send him out to work and tell him to man-the-hell-up.

Just sayin.

He has a job.

dirtysexymonkey

victory wrote: »

My youngest has no demands (eldest did say that he will change in a few years time please no) he is very unaffected by the school kids getting, having, wanting, needing so far so he is not a present insisting child that demands so he is easy going and a pleasureto have around.

I 'favour' my youngest in terms of his character, his easy going happy I am quite content with my lot thanks mum kind of way yes rather than the eldest who is never happy with what he has got and always seeking what he has not got yes I do.

I think that the harsh words have been toned down because I did get told off for that and have learnt by that and I am sure that others including often myself would call him more than I could ever post on here

so the reason your youngest gets more from you is because you prefer him. im staggered frankly.

Caroline_a

victory wrote: »

But he is not though is he?

I thought he was 18?