What age to get rid of teddies/comfort blanket?

victory

No I promise I will not chuck them out of course not:D

I don't have any bad thoughts towards his friend at all, that is just it I guess that many 11 1/2 year olds do not have a clutch of teddies at the foot of the bed and therefore he saw it as strange.

I have spoken to him and he does not want them to go, he says they have to stay at the foot of the bed because he sleeps better with them there and have spoken to him about maybe moving them to a box or on top of his cupboard for 'when your friends come round' I reckon with a little of persuasion he could be happy with that idea:D

rachie_2011

I still used a blanket and sucked my thumb until 3 years ago when I finally moved out of my parents and in with my boyfriend (I was 27) and it never did me any harm!

Ask your son what he wants to do... maybe some of the teddies could be put away, but some left on a shelf some where so he's still got some in the room. If his friends ask him about the teddies he could always just tell them that they are sentimental teddies (which they are) and from when he was a baby, or even a white lie and that 'Mum makes me keep them in my room'!

As for the blanket... if it's hiding under the duvet, noone would see it any way!

I think it's up to your Son at the end of the day... but there is no answer to what age should you get rid of these things. It's up to him... just make sure he knows it's not some thing to be embarrassed of!

victory

Alikay wrote: »

I'd just put the teddies in a basket, box or one of those collapsible laundry bin things and drape the folded the blanket across the end of the bed like a throw. 11 or 12 isn't too old for teddies IMO, but it might be too old for a boy to go public with it, especially around the type of mates who'd enjoy ridiculing him.

Now that is a good idea, thank you for that, that is perfect, then that combines both the teddies and the blanket and no one needs know, perfect:D

victory

rachie_2011 wrote: »

I still used a blanket and sucked my thumb until 3 years ago when I finally moved out of my parents and in with my boyfriend (I was 27) and it never did me any harm!

Ask your son what he wants to do... maybe some of the teddies could be put away, but some left on a shelf some where so he's still got some in the room. If his friends ask him about the teddies he could always just tell them that they are sentimental teddies (which they are) and from when he was a baby, or even a white lie and that 'Mum makes me keep them in my room'!

As for the blanket... if it's hiding under the duvet, noone would see it any way!

I think it's up to your Son at the end of the day... but there is no answer to what age should you get rid of these things. It's up to him... just make sure he knows it's not some thing to be embarrassed of!

Yes thanks I have spoken to him gently and he does not want them to go, he wants them to stay but it is a great solution what alikay said:D

He was just upset his friend 'was being so mean to me mum about my room and my teddies and my blanket'

balletshoes

I was going to suggest keeping them and putting them in a blanket box/cupboard/wardrobe. Thats what my DD does. But you've spoken to him, he doesn't want them moving off his bed usually. So they stay - but you need to talk to him about not getting upset about it if his new friends make comments, because its his choice after all to have his teddies on display.

bagginslover

I didn't start using a comfort 'thing' til I was in my teens! In my case its a particular cushion that I have to hug at night, I'm 31 now!

Please don't take them away from him, have a chat with him about whether he'd like a box big enough to put them all in for when his friends come over. Then leave it up to him. If he wants to hide them he can, and if, like me, he doesn't give a monkeys what others think, he'll leave them out.

I suspect at the age he is now he'll do the former, but it needs to be his choice or he'll resent you and/or your husband for it.

19lottie82

Victory, I'd say let him keep them. If he gets comfort / happiness from them, it seems cruel to forceably take them away. However, as others have suggested, maybe a little bit of gentle persuassion won't go a miss.

But ultimately, at the end of the day, if the peer pressure continues, he will have to decide is it worth putting up with to keep his teddies? I think, that very shortly, he will decide it isn't. It's a ll part of maturing and growing up.

Try not to worry about this too much. Your son will work it out on his own, when he is ready.

Kay_Peel

This brought back memories of the time I employed a child-minder to pick up my school-aged children. They were horrified to discover that she sucked her thumb and held a comfort blanket, when she sat down to watch TV with them. She was 25. Let's just say that I found an alternative because that was just plain weird in their eyes.

It is rather unusual to find that a boy collects cuddly toys and displays them - I can imagine that his friend questioned your son's sexual orientation because it's something society associates with little girls, not near-teens of the male variety. I can also understand his reaction to the need for a comfort blanket - if boys need to keep warm they will put on an extra jumper or a woolly hat because comfort blankets are usually for babies and toddlers, in their eyes.

He has been left with an impression of your son as a girly-toddler rather than the male-near-teen that he thought he was. At 11, most boys want to be the same and hide their differences or their childishness and to find one who openly displays his female/child side must have come as a shock.

If he can put up with the jokes that are likely to follow, and is confident in his sexuality and his maturity then he's got nothing to worry about.

choccybikkie_2

Ah your poor son. I have never even thought about this before, my ds is 10 and has lots of teddies on his bed, don't think any of his friends have said anything yet but that would probably upset him, he's a very sensitive boy and does like his teddies ( as you said op he doesn't 'play' with them but most are sentimental). I think it's such a shame that kids have to grow up or hide things in order to conform. I really have never thought about it before as i have a 12 yr old dd and i suppose it is different for girls
As someone suggested putting them in a little box is a great idea.

victory

Thank you all very much for your replies:D I have been up in his room, found a box to put the teddies in and a place and folded up his blue blanket so that it will fit inside it and can be just there on the side or in my room if he wants until his mates leave, have put it all back whatever I have touched because I can't imagine he would be best pleased to come home and find I have re-arranged his room:D

When he gets back from school will suggest it to him, let him lead the way, I know OH is a bit like 'he is far too old for all that' but the other side is apart from kids commenting in his room he loves them and is doing no harm:D