Wedding I've just found out

victory

......................................................

melancholly

this whole situation is mad..... why on earth haven't your parents told you about it? i'd imagine they would want to break it to you gently and explain the situation so that you don't hear about it by other means.

i think that whatever issues may have happened in the past, deliberately excluding you from her wedding and somehow orchestrating a cover up with the rest of the family pretty much draws a line in the sand..... this is not going to be easy to come back from and causes a huge rift out of a difficult relationship. it's cranking up the tension in a major way - i'd expect it to be pretty final in terms of salvaging a relationship, so this is a big gesture to choose to make. it's pretty shameful on the family as a whole and i think you should be just as disappointed in your parents.

i'd be very hurt but on the other hand, if this is what she's like, then the sooner you know the better.

Tish_P

If you don't like them, you shouldn't have invited them to your wedding and you should be relieved rather than upset that you're not invited to theirs. It's not their fault you invited them, would you rather they'd refused?

victory

Totally_Supurb wrote: »

i It seems like its just the secret which is keeping her going as I spoke to her today and gave her every opportunity to tell me and all i heard was joy in her voice that I didn't know what was going on

You could be misinterpreting that as you know but she does not know you know so now when you speak it has taken on a different edge for you

victory

Totally_Supurb wrote: »

sorry maybe i haven't explained properly. My parents don't know yet. I've actually told them. But i agree that I'm not sure how we can come back from this
i'd be very hurt but on the other hand, if this is what she's like, then the sooner you know the better.

So who actually told you and do you know it is true rather than just a rumour or gossip?

melancholly

Totally_Supurb wrote: »

sorry maybe i haven't explained properly. My parents don't know yet. I've actually told them. But i agree that I'm not sure how we can come back from this

oh ok..... are they eloping?! if they haven't told anyone then that might actually be better than just not telling you and singling you out iyswim. or do you know others who are invited so it really means your whole side of the family has been deliberately not invited?

victory

Totally_Supurb wrote: »

I found out on here!! thats how i'm not meant to know about it as she doesn't know I know its her

So on this forum your sis is on and she does not know that you know her forum name?

melancholly

Totally_Supurb wrote: »

I found out on here!! thats how i'm not meant to know about it as she doesn't know I know its her

then stop posting..... making this a row about knowing each other's MSE ids is a bad plan. it could end up making you look snide. right now, she's being pretty badly behaved - don't stoop to her level or you could end up making yourself look worse. an anonymous internet forum is not the best way to have pointed family arguements......

victory

melancholly wrote: »

oh ok..... are they eloping?!

Gretna green or maritiaus?

melancholly

victory wrote: »

So on this forum your sis is on and she does not know that you know her forum name?

a quick browse of the forum and she soon will (this thread is on two boards already!)