My son is 4 weeks off being 18 and he says

Lotus-eater

Reggie_Rebel wrote: »

As a qualified football coach i can give him some tips there.

Step One - Get the FA level 1 course, if you aren't coaching at a Junior Club that will cost you £120, but only take you a week.

Step Two - Get the FA level 2 badge. This will take you a minimum of six months and cost you about £250, you'll have to find someone willing to let you coach their team as you have to have logged hours.

Step Three - Do the FA Youth Modules, there are three of these they will take two weekends each and cost you £150 each, most county FA's run one a year, One of the modules that is, not one of each.

You can now go and try and get some paid work. This will either be in schools where the pay is poor or in professional Academies where the pay is poor and unless you have played at level 3 or above your chances of getting in are poor. Be prepared to work five evenings and all weekend.

You don't seem to cast being a football coach in a very bright light?

newcook

I love those who have said that the training should have been put into place years ago! Sometimes teenagers are just teenagers and think they know better than everyone else (obviously according to 18 year olds moms and dads have never been 18!)

While I have never been workshy (the day I left school I started working and have never been unemployed for more than 4 days) I did think I knew it all – and like your son gave it all ‘when Im 18 Im going to do this and that’. Every time I said this my Mom would smile, nod her head, ‘yes dear, Im sure you will’, etc! I don’t think she even looked up from her book each time I came out with this!!

As promised, not long after my 18th I moved into a house with a couple of friends…… and 6 months later I moved back home!! I was a damn sight more grown up and had more respect for living under my parents roof and after that I never grumbled when it was rent day!

ska_lover

HI OP

My son was exactly the same just before he turned 18. (hes 19 now). I used to give him the 'yeah..whatever' attitude rather than get worked up over it, and in reality nothing has changed for the worse since.

Since turning 18 he has got a job and pays his own way, doesn't really do anything to wind me up these days apart from having a complete TIP of a bedroom. I just keep the door shut saves your blood pressure..

barbiedoll

I have to agree with newcook...I moved into a flat share with my mate when we were 19. When you're a teenager, you think that you'll get your own place and it will be filled with all your mates, drinking, partying and having a non-stop good time.

Of course, the reality is nothing like that. After one week we both had nothing to wear, the 10 minute walk to the launderette with a huge bag of dirty washing was a bit of a wake-up call. My mate phoned her mum and asked her to come round with the car to pick it up. Her mum, having put up with similar treatment as the OP, politely declined, telling us that it was our responsibility now that we were independant young women. We hardly ever made it to work on time because we couldn't haul our lazy @rses out of bed without a cup of tea and a wake-up call from Mum. We lived on chips and cheap beer because we didn't budget enough to feed ourselves properly. And even the telly was a rented one which we had to feed with 50p pieces, we used to save our change just so that we could watch Eastenders in one hit on a Sunday afternoon! :rotfl::rotfl:

We too, slinked back home after a few months, full of new-found appreciation for our parents, especially our mums. The lure of a proper roast dinner was too much to resist and having spare money with which to enjoy ourselves was the icing on the cake. Bills, rent, food budgets, and the sheer drudgery of keeping a home and looking after ourselves proved too much for our delicate dispositions!

OP, he will appreciate you one day, all teenagers feel that they are hard done by, it's genetically hardwired into their brains to be moody, sullen and ungrateful. Just console yourself with the fact that one day, he will quite probably have an equally horrid son or daughter, making his life a misery too!

victory

Thanks, I know or rather hope it is a passing phase:rotfl: when he is at his gf we all sigh with relief as the atmosphere is plesant and happy and no moaning, shouting, wanting war is bliss:D he talks on and on about getting a room with his gf as a couple of his friends have done that so far when they got together so he thinks it is all friday night parties, with stacks of beers, all your mates round, watching the football on a saturday, waking up in the afternoons, here if he stops over I go into his room at 9am with the dust pan and brush and start loudly sweeping, open his curtains, he hates me for it:rotfl::rotfl:

He knows it is coming though, he looks at the clock, sighs and lets me get on with it, I will not allow him to loiter in bed all morning, get up and go and look for a job:D

victory

ska_lover wrote: »

HI OP

My son was exactly the same just before he turned 18. (hes 19 now). I used to give him the 'yeah..whatever' attitude rather than get worked up over it, and in reality nothing has changed for the worse since.

Since turning 18 he has got a job and pays his own way, doesn't really do anything to wind me up these days apart from having a complete TIP of a bedroom. I just keep the door shut saves your blood pressure..

My son is not partial to an untidy room, he is very fussy with his hair and his looks and ironing his clothes just so, when I throw his clothes in his room he can't bare them lying around and making the room look messy so I am lucky in that way that he will put them away, I am not saying he will do it immediately but he will do it eventually:D

January20

victory wrote: »

My son is not partial to an untidy room, he is very fussy with his hair and his looks and ironing his clothes just so, when I throw his clothes in his room he can't bare them lying around and making the room look messy so I am lucky in that way that he will put them away, I am not saying he will do it immediately but he will do it eventually:D

I tell you what: you get your son to come and teach my daughter about how to keep a room tidy, and I will get her to teach him about being a responsible young adult, get a job and pay his own way. Does that sound like a fair deal? :rotfl::rotfl:

victory

Cor yes I will take you up on that deal definetly when can we start?:D

ceridwen

Okays - in fairness - he does sound like he expects more than is realistic.

I am a bit confused though - ie about the mention of jobs. You state that both he and his girlfriend are at school on the one hand and it looks as if you are expecting him to get a job and state the girlfriend works 3 days a week on the other hand.

I automatically took "he needs to get a job" as meaning he had left school - so was surprised to see he still seems to be there.

I'm certainly very confused about any idea of him working "nights". By "nights" - do you actually mean "evenings" or do you mean "nights"?

I must admit I wouldnt even contemplate working nights in any circumstances as an adult - the thought simply never occurred to me when I was unemployed even. I know that some peeps would then say "spoilt brat" at me for thinking that way - but I dont actually believe in ANYONE working nights unless they both need a job (having left education) AND the job they are after requires night shift working as an absolute necessity (eg nurse/doctor/public transport driver/etc).

I admit I would have been absolutely furious - and extremely upset - at my parents if they had even mentioned working nights. In fairness to my parents (though money was in short supply) they never so much as hinted at me to get a part-time job on top of my school work. I did do part-time jobs (in daytime hours only) because I had decided to do so myself - but there wasnt any question of being expected to do so.

victory

Evenings, he could work evenings and weekends.

GF has a summer job, 3 days a week until they go back in Spetember. it has risen to 4 because one of her colleagues has been ill so they gave her an extra shift, obviously she is delighted extra money.

Not nights ,evenings after school finishes at 3.15pm there is plenty of day left to get a job.