Stripper Opinions - but fear I may regret it.

euronorris

I suspect, but cannot confirm this, that Torry is quite religious. I am only saying this because of an earlier comment in the thread that one should only 'flaunt their body' within a marriage. It stood out to me, as she chose to say marriage, not relationship.

In which case, she could have very deep rooted, strong feelings about covering up the human body and sexual interaction that is connected to her faith. I would suspect then, that nothing we say will change her opinion on the subject matter. And that is fine, it is her choice, her belief and we should respect that. So long as she also respects that others feel differently.

janninew

Any wrote: »

It was a commen to Tory Quinn who made it feel into something to be ashamed of. If he can generalise why can't I? Opinions like his are in my opinion even unheathy, and no wonder people have issues with bodies if they are brought up like that. In my opinion only of course.

I have no issue with people who don't want to see friends body, I am deffending why some do by the way.

And no idea where did you come from where I said anything about RoxieW being strange. At all.

You took the whole thing out of context..

As you have now added to your post since I made mine, I don't feel I took it out of context, it wasn't clear that your post was responding to a specific one, if it were clear, then I agree, my comment would be taken out of context.

Lifes_Grand_Plan

Sorry not got time to read the rest of the thread since page 5 so these points may have been covered:

- Although I got taken to a strip club for my stag and the lads paid for a private dance, I think it was about £50 for it. Good job the lads paid for me because the MSE part of me was doing overtime and I would never have paid £50....!!!! :eek:

- I wonder how many women who dislike strip clubs / !!!!!! etc think their husbands have never been to a strip club / watched !!!!!! recently. I then wonder how many of them are correct in their thoughts.

- A lot of womens reasons above for disliking strip clubs seems to be down to their own insecurity they have about their own body.

- I do wonder if a lot of people disliking strip clubs actually fully understand what happens at them. Whether they have some idea that its like a "massage parlour" where the bloke can ask for "extras" etc. If thats what you think then you are wrong (certainly from the ones I have been to).

Any

janninew wrote: »

As you have now added to your post since I made mine, I don't feel I took it out of context, it wasn't clear that your post was responding to a specific one, if it were clear, then I agree, my comment would be taken out of context.

I disagree - it was a general comment (with part hinted to Tory), and you took it as it was aimed at RoxieW for some reason. That to me is out of context. But it doesn't matter now.

In regards to the OPs situation - I think that Roxie's comment "turn my stomach" when talking about strippers/seeing stripers is overly dramatic and that it was blown out of proportion due to underlying problems in the relationship.

I too don't consider "nail some stripers" as throw away comment, even though I can say to the TV "Oh, I would do him". But that is on the TV, not in a stripclub where it is actually possible. For me nail some stripers means just that.

And this is from a person who has no issues with her OH going to a stripclub... I know he just looks, he has been twice, once on his stag do and once on a friend's birthday and says "it was O.K., but I wouldn't go if they didn't". No idea whether he would, for all I know he might, but as long as he is just looking I don't care.

If I knew they ordered prostitutes to a party I would feel different. There is big difference between the two IMO.

Strippers main purpose is to strip, dance and show the body. They might do special arrangement, some of them, I am not denying that, but it takes effort (taking her aside, agreeing where and when and price etc.). So it is not offered on a plate and normal happy in a marriage bloke would not do that. And if he was to go out for sex it is easier to order a prostitute.
It is just that - entertainment.

Prostitutes main purpose is sex, with no effort involved, offered on a plate and obviously ordering them means that there is something not right immediately.

That is where my black and white comes from.

MrsTinks

Lifes_Grand_Plan wrote: »

Sorry not got time to read the rest of the thread since page 5 so these points may have been covered:

- Although I got taken to a strip club for my stag and the lads paid for a private dance, I think it was about £50 for it. Good job the lads paid for me because the MSE part of me was doing overtime and I would never have paid £50....!!!! :eek:

- I wonder how many women who dislike strip clubs / !!!!!! etc think their husbands have never been to a strip club / watched !!!!!! recently. I then wonder how many of them are correct in their thoughts.

BINGO!
I have friends in the adult entertainment industry and the amount of times they have told me about "clients" turning off their cams quickly half way through a cam session because their other half came upstairs, got home early etc... :rotfl:I'm willing to bet that all these women have men who NEVER look at !!!!!! or strippers or adult websites or page 3's.... :A
I have no issue with !!!!!! so long as it's legal - infact I have looked at a few of my hubby's mags and found them boring :rotfl: So I told him to get some more interesting ones or he's not allowed any more Bless him he nearly jogged to the nearest shop there and then to get some that might interest me...

If he wants to go to a stripclub (and I know he's been in the past before he met me) then he can - he knows he can, I have no problem with him going... what I WOULD have a problem with is if he spent £200 on going! Even £50 would grate me... and now I've converted him to MSE it would bug him too... money seems to get stuck in his wallet a lot more Would I object to him having a lapdance in a club? Probably not... because I know from friends in the trade that 99% of reputable clubs will not allow their dancers to do anything but dance. And I know hubby is too tight to pay for it when he can have it for free at home

Maybe I'm weird, who knows, but I've also seen the equivalent of chippendales (the aussie version) and sure they were quite fit, but I couldn't help but walk out thinking "hmmm way too much baby oil, dance routine wasn't well enough rehearsed, the 5 henparties at the front were crude and frankly disgraceful and what a waste of £30... good job I didn't pay but got paid to be there!!!"

But hey as I say... I must be weird... I trust my husband

Jo_F

A lot of men are interested in '!!!!!!' for a variety of reasons, and generally they have no bearing on the wife/girlfriend/partner.

I know that my other half likes well endowed ladies, something of which I am not, so it doesn't bother me when he oggles some random woman's assets, be it on the tv, online etc. I know that its still me that he takes to bed, and if he was faced with Natalie Portman and me, he would chose me.

A lot of the industry is fantasy and illusion, men may be a strong providing partner, but there could be a little bit of him that needs to be put down, dominated and humiliated, or there could be a small part of him that still wants to be a small boy, but this is somethng that he could never tell his partner, he has too much respect for the relationship to do that, so if the need gets too great, then he will find an outlet for it.

He may have the perfect partner at home, but there could be a time when he just wants to see something trashy, he may yearn to see his partner do a seductive strip or lapdance for him, but he has put her on a pedestal and that's just something that he CANNOT ask his partner to do, men don't see strippers or lapdancers as wifey material, there is a definate line between the two.

Just because a man is looking, it does not mean that he loves his partner any less, or that she is failing him (well 99.9% of the time anyway)

RedwoodBrook

Any wrote: »

But that is on the TV, not in a stripclub where it is actually possible.

You've never been to a strip club have you?

euronorris

MrsTine wrote: »

Maybe I'm weird, who knows, but I've also seen the equivalent of chippendales (the aussie version) and sure they were quite fit, but I couldn't help but walk out thinking "hmmm way too much baby oil, dance routine wasn't well enough rehearsed, the 5 henparties at the front were crude and frankly disgraceful and what a waste of £30... good job I didn't pay but got paid to be there!!!"

But hey as I say... I must be weird... I trust my husband

Eugh, male strippers are so not as good as female strippers. IMO, they don't actually do ANYTHING that excites me. Mostly, they act a bit stupid, cover themselves in oil, and just make me laugh with the silly routines. So, I have no interest in them, and have only seen them in the past at friends hen do's. But, maybe that says more about how us women are excited? More about the romance than the naked flesh. I dunno.

My OH is not keen on me going to see strip shows, mainly because of his mis conceptions about what it's like. Although, to be fair, the really outrageous hen do's, give the rest of us a bad name. But, he knows he can trust me, and so had no problem with it when I went to my sisters (we originally had something very different planned, but the company we booked through went bust, and strip club was a cheap alternative - we had to wait quite a while to get our money refunded by the CC companies).

But, I have a problem with lap dances because they're dancing on your lap. Sure, in some clubs, they won't touch at all, but in others they will. It also depends on which country you're in. ie, experiences in London strip clubs will vary from those in Amsterdam, or Prague. Having another woman touch my OH in a sexual way, is a form of cheating IMO, and thankfully, he feels the same way. But he doesn't really have any desire to go out and have a stranger dance on his lap, take his money, and then b'gger off just as he's getting started anyway! :rotfl:

BexInLondon

Wow, such a diversity of opinions on this. OP, I don't know the context, but if it were me I'd be very, very upset. Both by the nature and tone of the conversation you saw, but also by the secrecy. If my husband were to deliberately seek any form of sexual gratification outside of our marriage I'd consider it cheating, though I get from this thread that others wouldn't. Being honest I find it really hard not to think of men who go to lap-dancing clubs etc as losers - that's not a considered opinion, just how I feel when I hear friends talk and I know it's judgemental. But then they probably think I'm a kill-joy.

On a separate note, and this is not a criticism of the OP, situations like this are why I think it's so important to have wide-ranging discussions before committing to marriage. My husband and I talked about everything from how we would manage our money to how much time we expected to spend with our families to what we considered as cheating. This means that we are both crystal clear on each other's expectations. There are books and courses out there that help with these discussions... we did a course at a church.

euronorris

RedwoodBrook wrote: »

You've never been to a strip club have you?

To be fair, that depends entirely on the strip club and stripper in question.

I don't believe the line of 99% of strip clubs, nothing untoward happens. Unless, of course, someone is able to back that up with actual figures, which I doubt.

I do believe that the majority of places are above board, but I think the number which are not, is higher than you think. Certainly, the number of strippers who are not 'above board' could be much, much higher.