Opinions..

grey_lady

hhmm - wiltedwillow, sounds like your OH is a bit of a <male chicken/>
have you thought about finishing it with him?

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Danstar, parents can be crap - we have all these hopes and expections but yeah.

Sequeena

Me and the OH don't do cards. It's a waste of paper.

If he's acting as though it's just another day then I think you have the right to be mad but don't be mad simply because he didn't get you a card.

Sequeena

shellsuit wrote: »

For those who think cards are a waste of time and money, we keep special cards, both birthday and Christmas.

You never know what will happen to people and they're always nice to look back on and remember.

I still have a card from my Nan and Grandad for my first Christmas (1975!), my Grandad passed away not long after that so it's nice I still have that little reminder of him.

Aw that's nice I have a few cards lying about (21st, 18th etc) but I ask people not to get me them usually as I do see them just as a waste.

My mum always gives me one though as she's crazy for cards.

jackieb

I rarely get anything for my birthday, or Christmas either. I can count the amount of cards i've had on one hand - and we've been together for 25 years. I've been with him long enough now not to expect anything, and if I do get something then it's a bonus. I always get him something for Christmas but not often for his birthday - depends if he's at home or working away. I once got a Dyson from him for my 30th. I wasn't pleased at that. I'd have rather had nothing! It doesn't really bother me. We don't make big fusses over birthdays.

Caroline73_2

Danstar wrote: »

I totally feel for the OP. For my 21st bday my parent didnt get me a gift, my mum had work but said shed make blueberry pancakes - my favourite - for breakfast but "was running" late. Neither of them organised any kind of party and the only present I got was 21 off mum and same off Dad as token gifts because "they didn't know what I'd wanted" I felt so upset that neither of them had bothered to so anything or get me anything special as this is meant to be the big adult birthday. I felt palmed off and like they didn't really care/have time for me.

I felt unable to confront them on it because I don't have a spoilt personality that would do this so after a fee days when it had really got to me I texted them both explaining how I felt. They'd known it was coming for 21 years. That I didn't expect or want anything out of the message as my birthday had been and gone. It was over. I just felt they had to know they hurt me.

To make things worse I'm very considerate to my parents for my mums birthday for her after work, her bday is in January and it's freezing and dark outside, I bought about 10 cards from Hallmark. I had one at the door telling her to take her shoes off one as she opened the door telling her to look at th radiator - her slippers were on them all warned up. Another one telling her to the bottom of the staircase. Another to go upstairs to the landing another to the bath room and anothe to open the door. Here was a bubble bath, candles, a bottle of champagne in a cooler and a glass already poorer with a bowl of marshmallows (get favorite sweets) because she'd appreciate this more than buying her a present.

It wasn't even a special birthday just her 43rd. To get palmed off so bad I was so let down by my parents. My dad, self employed runs his own business so can, and does, has all the time off he wants posted me a card - arrived a day late and a phone call on the day at half 3. If it wasn't for my girlfriend taking me out for lunch it would have been so depressing.

Sorry if the OP thinks I hijacked her thread just empathising through relative experience.

DId your gf pay for that lunch? or did your dad with your £500 per month spending money?

https://forums.moneysavingexpert.com/discussion/2496375

Any

wiltedwillow wrote: »

Hi

would you be annoyed if your husband didn't even bother to get you a birthday card and when you mentioned it you were told 'i did say happy birthday'

I do not feel this is acceptable, I have spent the day doing house hold chores, its just another day to him and now he's making out I'm the one who is asking for too much!

thanks

Wilted

I would also be cross. I mean - I am not a big card person and I think they are a waste of money, but it seems you didn't get anything? Such as flowers or a present? My OH would be standing outside the house with a suitcase by now if he did that to me.

My OH is not very good with cards - couple of years ago it said "Many happy returns!!!" (and lots of love as well though). But "many happy returns" to your wife?? He said he doesn't know what to write in them. I said next year just get me bigger flowers:D

Any

wiltedwillow wrote: »

no risk of losing his job, no money worries, he just couldn't be bothered.

I have told him in the past id like him to make an effort and asked him to pick me something (could have even been under a fiver) but he didn't bother.

Married for 3 years and birthday was yesterday, dad cooked me a birthday meal for me to bring back home, he got the hump and asked me 'wheres mine?'!!!! so I had to make him some dinner!

Whaaat:eek:
He is a right catch!! Get rid!!

Any

DKLS wrote: »

That should be grounds for divorce, I always make a massive fuss over my wives birthday as it falls 3 days after xmas day and a lot of family members seem to forget.

I take her into Leeds, lunch at Harvey Nicks and let her have upto a grand for a shopping spree, with me tagging along paying for everything and carrying everything. (And not moaning, rolling my eyes or huffing)

Can I merry you??;)

Mupette

ah well you can forget his birthday card and just mumble happy birthday to him, oh and tell him pudding is off as you can't be bothered.

Danstar_2

Caroline73 wrote: »

DId your gf pay for that lunch? or did your dad with your £500 per month spending money?

https://forums.moneysavingexpert.com/discussion/2496375

My girlfriend paid £20 and I paid the rest and the tip.