Leaving abusive relationships (merged)

Fran

Caroleann,

Are you ok?

trafalgar_2

hopefully she took the advice and got out ,could be why she hasn't replied


lets hope so

Gingham_Ribbon

trafalgar wrote:

hopefully she took the advice and got out ,could be why she hasn't replied


lets hope so

I hope so too.

dippy-dora_2

Caroleann wrote:

My daughter has been sent home from school, she took a pain in the chest while sprinting, then could'nt breathe, she was as white as a sheet and shaking when I got to school, I had a quiet word with her teacher and put her in the picture and she has suggested that she have a talk with their councillors, I have agreed to that as I think she is bottling up a lot of pain,anger and fear.
It has got to get better or we'll both crack up.

That sounds very much like a panic attack, watch her incase she has anymore, they aren't pleasant and not something that you want a young child to start having, I'd suggest taking her to see your GP if she has another one.

I can't really offer much advice, everyone else has offered brilliant advice already, except that you are helping others that havn't posted by reading your story and people are rooting for you.

dippy-dora_2

hilary1 wrote:

Leave now!

Your resposibilty is your children. When are you going to stop whinging and act for your safety and primarily theirs.

You are choosing to stay with a violent man. They have no choice.

What is the matter with you woman:mad:

I also have to agree with this post.
Without saying too much I know someone in a very similar situation and she is staying because of the child they have (?!!)
I find the reasoning to that very hard to comprehend and I have tried telling her that, to me, all the more reason to leave because of a child, but unfortunately some women think staying is best for the child, I don't know why they think this and I can only think that they are scared of the unknown and that they would never take it out on the child so it's okay as it's only them they take it out on, not fully realising that by doing that it is still going to f the child right up in later years and probably they themselves will end up in a simialr situation.
it's all very sad and all too often results in a cycle of generations having the same sort of lives.
best to get out as soon as in my opinion, child or no child.

justpaper

*Destiny* did say some thing about ppl who know her "ex" come on this site so she didnt want too give out too much info

vik6525

ok, im really sorry if this isnt 100% money saving, but i need to get things off my chest and you know what they say about the kindness of strangers! ive been with my oh now for 3 and a half years, and the simple fact is, i cant remember any of the reasons why im with him. He runs his own business, which is only a shop (so its not like hes digging roads for a living or anything!), comes in from work at 5.15 every day, sits down and that it! he doesnt talk to me, he has a little complain about his day sometimes but nothing more. He shows no interest in my son (from a previous relationship), never wants to play with him, or take him out. He just comes in, sits down, eats his dinner and that it. we dont really have much of a 'love life', hes not at all tactile with me, never tells me he loves me, he just sits there, playing computer games until he goes to bed. I really dont know what to do anymore. I feel so neglected and unloved. his business is doing well, so i know he doesnt have money worries (not that you'd know it, he refuses to spend his money) and when i ask him whats going on he just says 'nothing, you're paranoid'.... I really dont know what to do and im kind of reaching the end of my tether now. Im sorry if this is in the wrong place, but i didnt know where to put it...... sorry. x

Prudent

It is very isolating to be in a relationship like this - it may even be more 'lonely' than being single because when you are with him you are not sepnding time with your friends. It sounds like its very one way and unless he is willing to communicate it wont move forward.
Hugs

vik6525

thats the problem you see. i told him last night how i feel, and if i dare to critisise him he sulks for days. he came home today, as usual, but hes just gone straight upstairs, and refuses to talk about how upset i am. if its not 'him' with the problem, then, as far as hes concerned, there simply is no problem..

mclaren_2

sorry to be so blunt but he sounds like a selfish bas*ard.

i dont get what you mean by "He runs his own business, which is only a shop (so its not like hes digging roads for a living or anything!" = to me this sounds like you are saying he dont work hard/lazy - which in a shop, isnt the case as you need to do loads of work. (not havin a dig, just sayin )

It could be that he is just tired?

if i were you, i would tell him ow u feel, and explain that he has to grow up, grow some balls and start to be a man instead of acting like a silly child in a temper tantrum.

if i were you hun i would start to think about him as an ex and move forward with your life. honestly - us men are not all like that

you could teach him a lesson and unplug the keyboard and mouse from the computer and lock them away that would make him not be in the pc lol.