NST August 2021: Lights, Camera, Action!

ldee2111

Thursday is my Friday. Glad it’s the end of the working week for me. I have felt a bit rubbish about my contribution this week. Every so often I get this sense that I’m not good at what I do. Imposter syndrome.

‘Imposter syndrome, also called perceived fraudulence, involves feelings of self-doubt and personal incompetence that persist despite your education, experience, and accomplishments’

Today I’m going to focus on doing  any ‘must-do’ tasks and decluttering my work space: the emails in my 3 inboxes, the lists, the notes, the file-filled desktop, so that I return on Monday to a clean space.

I’ll check in later with my progress.

Have a good day turtles. x

Thrifty_Taylor

NSD#3
Didn't do much yesterday as in a lot of pain. Caved in when hubby returned from his dialysis & took the mega strength painkiller, which helped immensely! Even sat up & did the ironing. Watched a programme about Cheapskates on TV, the lengths some people go to! I like to think I'm frugal, but would never be like that!! Do enjoy How to Save 1k in 24hrs though.
I'd emailed radio 2 again on Tuesday about being on the morning music quiz. They phoned yesterday to see if I qualify, then again to say I'll either be player 1, 2 or the stand by, so if you're listening & there is a contestant from Orkney, it's me!!

Grateful for painkillers, hubby looking after me, being able to take things easy & not feel there's things I should be doing

Toni'sfriend

NSD No 2

My laptop has been returned so I'm back in business.

Yesterday was fairly productive. Household chores done and I got rid of some more things from the cellar of doom. I can only do that a little at a time as I don't have any way of getting a large amount to the tip so it has to go in the bin. I'll have to wait till the council start doing bulk uplifts again to get rid of most of it.

Yesterday was lovely. I spent a lot of time outside tidying and cleaning the porch and attending to the plants. I really wish I had a garden. Today's forecast is pretty miserable so it's going to have to be the Boy's ex room. What a joy!!

Finished the book I started and I'm now on to the third one of the series. Unfortunately it's the last one so I'll have to look for something else.

Off to have breakfast and get on with things.

mothernerd

Did some work in the garden - tipped out some large planters and then filled them with loose soil and potatoes (the loose soil mound is blocking a corner and preventing progress on several other jobs) and turned the polytunnel frame (lots of things blocking it into its former position). 

Came inside to rest and my ex phoned to tell me a friend had died. He was assuming the funeral would be at the Parish church (and he will be there if he can - though that is very complicated). I sunk into a bit of a gloom, I don't know what sort of funeral it will be or where, I'm not sure who I can phone for more info (the local paper isn't out until Thursday - online announcements only went up to the 29th) and there would be lots of people at the funeral whom I have no desire to see. 

I've decided he was a friend. Not going out getting drunk friends. But he was one of the good guys, we always stopped and spoke when we met (his wife also, in fact I've probably seen her more frequently in recent years). I've been invited to their house on a number of occasions (both social and for fundraising) but never went because they'd have been large and crowded (not the sort of situations I'm comfortable in). He was one of the few men I could have intelligent conversations with, he always checked to see if I wanted a lift home from meetings we were both at.  

He was a friend. I'm going to ask for one of mum's condolence cards (I stocked up) and write to his wife and daughter (DS1 was friends with the daughter, don't know how much contact they have these days).

Whilst I was lolling about, it started to rain. This was very unexpected. I'd uncovered the trolley full of diy items (lots of screws and other bits) as part of the cover was entangled with the polytunnel frame. I managed to get out a bit later, moved some of the things from the trolley into the shed and then started to assemble some plant support from the bits of the mini greenhouse frame. It bucketed down again. I moved the other things from the trolley to the shed, did a little more plant support (I had a bit sort of 'hanging') and got absolutely soaked.

Came in, peeled the wet top from my back, showered washed my hair, cut most of it (will need further trimming but will let it dry/ settle first). Climbed into bed and read (had washed my mask and the hose earlier - it's called tubing but looks exactly like the hose for the old twin tub). So a couple of things off my 'to do' list for the week and progress on the ongoing elephants.

I also sat down and told mum the first stage in my 'going home' was to continue to sleep here - so I'm here when she wakes and goes to sleep and if she needs me during the night - but to try being 'out' (at home, in town, walking) for one or two days a week. If she's ill I will stay with her (and can do things like putting washing out) and will stay on days I have to take her to appointments (even if I had other plans). 

She thinks she's capable and independent. She's talking about Wilts farm food (for some variety in her meals, not all meals, not even every week) and how she 'can pay the driver'. I explained that this was 'unsafe' (driver could not be allowed inside the house to put meals away, she must not take stuff directly from him or hand money directly to him). Her partner's 'minimum compliance' family have got her thinking 'it's all over' whilst the latest variant is running high in our area and our govt's foolishness (and desire to kill as many of us as possible before we claim our pensions) is putting the whole world at risk (doctor's/ scientists and the rest of the world have said loosening controls with an only half-vaccinated population is a recipe for countless new variants - because viruses adapt to changing circumstances).

Ah well, we shall see. I did intend going shopping yesterday afternoon (Wednesday afternoon is quiet in town). Only to Wilco (sealant/s, coal shovel, couple of other things on the list) and Tessimo (to use my ten pound survey voucher on things for me) but got delayed by events. Still thought about going at 7 pm (mum is watching some peculiar teenage drama and it was obvious I wasn't going to get an episode of my current drama) but the thought of explaining something as outlandish as going shopping at 7 pm to mum was beyond me.

The tv habit is an old one which those of you with busy lives might adopt, I always had one 'must see' show. which meant that I got to sit down for one hour in the day. When DS1 was a baby it was 'Thirtysomethings' on Thursdays (the day I spent all day in college, with a lunchtime dash and a teatime taxi to breastfeed DS1). After the 7 pm finish, I would collect all the children (from childminder's and mum or auntie at my house) take them home, bathe them and get them into bed, then collapse on the sofa (and rush round hoovering/ tidying in the ad breaks).

In the second year, an older student  asked why I was rushing home at lunch. To do the housework, because if I didn't my mum/ auntie would do it (they were minding the boys, I didn't want them doing my housework). He said 'Why not let them?'

Grateful for my friend's life, the life of my auntie (who was younger than I am now when she died and spent her life looking after other people's children and then my grandma for many years) and mum (despite her being a major pain in the ... at times). 

Buffythedebtslayer

"something as outlandish as going shopping at 7pm" Oh Mothernerd that sounds exactly like my mum! 

" where are you going" 
"Sainsbury's, do you want anything?"
"Want anything? It is 7 o'clock at night? what could I want??? Why are you going out now??" 
" To get lunch for work tomorrow" 
" Well why don't you see what is in the fridge?" 
" Already done that" 
"Oh you are too fussy, going out at this time of night!" 
"Bye Mum" 

It is such hard work  

XX

Thrifty_Taylor

Sending hugs to all, you deserve a medal Mothernerd!
I'm the first stand in contestant this morning, if no one backs out, the man from Radio 2 told me I'll be on tomorrow!

Buffythedebtslayer

Thrifty_Taylor said:

Sending hugs to all, you deserve a medal Mothernerd!
I'm the first stand in contestant this morning, if no one backs out, the man from Radio 2 told me I'll be on tomorrow!

ooo exciting I would be so nervous! Good luck XX 

Calling14

Good luck Thrifty taylor let us know if you get on and I will listen again.

Grateful for a day off yesterday, even though long wasted trip to see Neice camping and her family. No sign of phone signal when I got there. Up visiting from down South, probably see her next year now. Nice 2 hr sit by the lake anyway and chat with lovely guy.  Took cakes bought home with me, a neighbour and dd1 plus gd came and ate them, followed by wine in the garden.

Uusual Thursday afternoon off food shop and house clean. Have a date later trying to push myself out of my comfort zone a bit. Not sure he's my type but coffee by the beach will be good anyway.

This week has flown by, need to plan something with younger dd before she heads back to Canada.

Deni_debt-free_dreamer

sorry to hear about your friend mothernerd; agree you deserve a medal!

Just dashed out to rescue the washing as it's started raining.  Did a couple of Swag$s surveys - or rather i didn't do them as 'not everyone can be a winner' (seems i rarely am!)

Thrifty - i always listen to that quiz so i hope to hear you talking to Ken tomorrow, how exciting!!

Back later to catch up
Deni x

ditty1234

@mothernerd sorry about your friend.

No real news about ds1.

Grateful for a lovely walk w friend.