Huge wedding problem :(

welshbabe88

Well I don't think I'd disagree with him staying. He was there for his friend - as they have a long history. Ignore the bride.

His wife had falling a out with her so not invited - again not his problem - his friend knows the score but cannot change the bride's mind. His look out.

Don't think I would mind to be at home alone - rather that that going to such a b****'s wedding. People can have friendships outside of marriage.

Though it might be hard to maintain that close friendship to the groom after marriage.

Gavin83

AylesburyDuck wrote: »

Totally disagree,
While the OP may well think this, and hell the wife might even be deluded enough to think this.................it will however make a real nasty return if things in the marriage begin to stale!
No, he's never ever going to be able to get away from the fact that he chose his best friend and spiteful wife over his partner.
And i agree with other posters, the wife will never have been able to say this out loud because then she wouldnt have been seen as the bigger person, but deep down...:eek:
And i fully believe it will come to haunt him, maybe not for a fair few years, maybe tomorrow, but definitely sometime!

In the OPs case were it to come out in the future I think I'd be seriously reconsidering my relationship, I'm not sure I could be with someone that two faced. Say what you mean or put up with it, don't say one thing, stew on it for years and then throw it back in my face. This is very much playing games and I don't play games in my relationship.

I also don't think the OP did anything wrong or showed disloyalty in regards to the bridesmaid. You can't control someone hitting on you, you can only control your actions in this situation and it doesn't sound like he did anything wrong.

However saying this in the OPs situation I think I'd have gone home before the evening.

Also, if this is a troll post (I personally don't think it is) it's one of the best threads I've seen on here for a while.

leighavfc

warby68 wrote: »

Oh wow

You went and stayed for the whole thing

Your poor wife - you chose to allow her full and extended humiliation and in no way compromised to show equal support for both 'sides'. It doesn't matter how generous she was with her offer and how much she meant it. You should have shown her the same kindness. Imagine her joy if you'd come home to snuggle up with her and shown you really couldn't have a whale of a time without her in these circumstances. Instead you partied with the best of them including engaging with bridesmaids with dodgy intentions.

Did anyone in the whole thread agree with this course of action? I don't remember it.

This was all about you really.

Your wife DOES sound like a gem. I hope you make it up to her very quickly and very well.

Ok so how the hell could i have got home after already having a fair share of beer before the meal...drink drive?? being around 30 mile away from home...plus my wife being not able to drive... plus paying for the hotel for us both before the problems arose? A friend was going home but decided to stay instead... and besides all that she had been texting me all evening how it was all going, send me some pics. I hope your having a good time.. the facts are there to see... a few on here are trying to see things that are simply not there..

Infact i took her out yesterday for some retail therapy, a meal and drinks so please dont preach your absolute nonsense about my wife who again had told me too enjoy myself... who during the course of the day kept in touch with me... who again phoned me to say me and kids cant wait to see you... honestly cannot understand what planet some of you live on. YOU DONT KNOW MY WIFE FGS!!

Shall i take a pot guess at who and what your wife is about? No i wont bother, ive never met her so have nothing to base my guesses on.

Me and my wife have a great relationship.. i have known her for 15 years, been together for 10 years and married for 4 year. She speaks her mind and so do i so will everybody who thjnks shes mad turn it in... infact today i had message to say ive brough you tickets for the football in a few weeks time... yeah she absolutely furious with me that she has spent money to get me out the house again :rotfl::rotfl::rotfl::beer: what the hell am i going to do?

I know my partner as well as her own mom and dad do. She is not a maniac that sets me up to fall down simple as that. She speaks her mind i know where i stand and do not have to worry about it popping up in the future.... THERE IS NO PROBLEM AT ALL. PLEASE READ AND TAKE IT ON BOARD!!!

I will NOT be posting anymore in this thread

IM OUT!! Thank you for all the normal understanding people in here!

-taff

There'll be more. Probably because the fun one about Yellow Stickers has disappeared....:)

pimento

Methinks he doth protest too much.

happyandcontented

[QUOTE=leighavfc;74829906]Ok so how the hell could i have got home after already having a fair share of beer before the meal...drink drive?? being around 30 mile away from home...plus my wife being not able to drive... plus paying for the hotel for us both before the problems arose? A friend was going home but decided to stay instead... and besides all that she had been texting me all evening how it was all going, send me some pics. I hope your having a good time.. the facts are there to see... a few on here are trying to see things that are simply not there..

Infact i took her out yesterday for some retail therapy, a meal and drinks so please dont preach your absolute nonsense about my wife who again had told me too enjoy myself... who during the course of the day kept in touch with me... who again phoned me to say me and kids cant wait to see you... honestly cannot understand what planet some of you live on. YOU DONT KNOW MY WIFE FGS!!

Shall i take a pot guess at who and what your wife is about? No i wont bother, ive never met her so have nothing to base my guesses on.

Me and my wife have a great relationship.. i have known her for 15 years, been together for 10 years and married for 4 year. She speaks her mind and so do i so will everybody who thjnks shes mad turn it in... infact today i had message to say ive brough you tickets for the football in a few weeks time... yeah she absolutely furious with me that she has spent money to get me out the house again :rotfl::rotfl::rotfl::beer: what the hell am i going to do?

I know my partner as well as her own mom and dad do. She is not a maniac that sets me up to fall down simple as that. She speaks her mind i know where i stand and do not have to worry about it popping up in the future.... THERE IS NO PROBLEM AT ALL. PLEASE READ AND TAKE IT ON BOARD!!!

I will NOT be posting anymore in this thread

IM OUT!! Thank you for all the normal understanding people in here![/QUOTE]

If you had intended going home then you would not have had a drink.

I think that is a very odd thing to do when your partner is at a wedding reception with your 'blessing'. The fact that you see that as a positive seems strange to me.

As you say, you know your wife, but I suspect that either she is not typical of most women (who would have been happy for you to support your friend at the wedding ceremony and the meal at a push) but would have expected you to read between the lines and decide for your self that staying for the evening do wasn't the thing to do. Having made the decision you would have also decided not to drink or got a taxi.

I wouldn't have expected her to say that you shouldn't attend as that would defeat the object of you showing her loyalty by reaching the decision on your own.

Red-Squirrel_2

leighavfc wrote: »

Ok so how the hell could i have got home after already having a fair share of beer before the meal...drink drive??

Don't drink, or get a taxi.

I do think the better course of action would have been to leave early, but hey ho you didn't want to. You basically acted as if everything was fine, didn't you? As if there had been no snub or upset at all.

NeilCr

happyandcontented wrote: »

As you say, you know your wife, but I suspect that either she is not typical of most women (who would have been happy for you to support your friend at the wedding ceremony and the meal at a push) but would have expected you to read between the lines and decide for your self that staying for the evening do wasn't the thing to do. Having made the decision you would have also decided not to drink or got a taxi.

.

Perhaps it would be better if "most" (not convinced this is the case at all) women said what they actually meant as opposed to expecting people to read between the lines. It might avoid a number of difficult misunderstandings and ongoing problems.

happyandcontented

NeilCr wrote: »

Perhaps it would be better if "most" (not convinced this is the case at all) women said what they actually meant as opposed to expecting people to read between the lines. It might avoid a number of difficult misunderstandings and ongoing problems.

So are you advocating telling your partner what to do in this situation rather than allowing him the autonomy to make up his own mind?

NeilCr

happyandcontented wrote: »

So are you advocating telling your partner what to do in this situation rather than allowing him the autonomy to make up his own mind?

Nope. Not sure where you got that from.

I cannot explain it any better than Pollycat did in #239 so I won't try.