Huge wedding problem :(

Pollycat

POPPYOSCAR wrote: »

That is the vital part.

As long as it is accepted by everyone and adhered to that that is fine.

A family member said no children at his wedding which everyone accepted. However, on the day there were children of friends of the bride there.

His sister left straight after the ceremony saying she had to check on the children.

He was most upset that neither of his sisters were in the photographs as the other one went with her.

Was he really most upset?
Was he surprised?
What a dimwit!

POPPYOSCAR

Pollycat wrote: »

Was he really most upset?
Was he surprised?
What a dimwit!

Yes he was!

His nieces and nephews were at his 2nd marriage though and in the photos!

It is a long story but he ended up being estranged from his family for a couple of years, not because of this but of because his wife did not like his family and certain things that she said and did, especially to his mum who was the sweetest person in the world.

The marriage did not last very long when he came to his senses.

miriamac

There's nothing quite like a wedding for bringing out the worst in people :eek:

Pollycat

miriamac wrote: »

There's nothing quite like a wedding for bringing out the worst in people :eek:

Apart from a death, maybe...

annandale

By the way Calley. I grew up in a home where my mum was abused by her ex husband. She was regularly beaten (she still has the scars) and on one occasion she needed emergency treatment but he refused to let her leave the house to get it and she was also seriously emotionally abused. She tried to get him out on several occasions but he would not go (it was her home). That was back in the day when beating your wife was treated as a domestic by police.

She worked with womens aid after she got him out and her and a friend tried to help a young girl who was at risk, she was 20 and had a small baby. Her partner was violent, social work persuaded her to return and she was stabbed to death.

I've seen a lot of physical and emotional abuse in my life.And one thing I do not do and have never done, is replicate it in my relationships. I have seen what it does to people first hand.
I don't treat my partners like that. I have never been controlling. I have never stopped a bf from having drinks with a friend. I have never questioned a partner or an ex partner about having female friends and I would never dream of stopping a partner have a female friend or having nights out with the boys.
Any jealousy that has been experienced in my relationships in the past has not come from me.

I am staggered that you chose to interpret what I said on here as being being bitter, controlling, not letting partners have nights out and that you are ashamed to be female because of people like me.

This situation is not about me. Its about them. Don't try and psycho analyse people you do not know and make assumptions about their relationships based on a few posts

And so what if you are the quietest person in real life, what relevance does it have exactly to what you have just posted to me?

You got it wrong. Way wrong.

POPPYOSCAR

Talking about weddings did anyone see on tv earlier about the bride who sent a list of rules out to all the guests.

From memory
It included

Everyone must have their hair in a bun or ponytail

None must have full make up

No one must wear white or cream

No one to post on facebook until told they can and all photos must be hashtag them.

and finally

No one must talk to the bride.

Archergirl

Well I started to read the thread but it go a little strange........just go to the evening no problem really is there........

Mummy2cheekymonkeys

POPPYOSCAR wrote: »

That is the vital part.

As long as it is accepted by everyone and adhered to that that is fine.

A family member said no children at his wedding which everyone accepted. However, on the day there were children of friends of the bride there.

His sister left straight after the ceremony saying she had to check on the children.

He was most upset that neither of his sisters were in the photographs as the other one went with her.

This is very similar to the situation with my dad and uncle. My cousin turned up with save the dates for all of us. Her and her fiance and my uncle (her dad) would come to ours every Christmas for dinner. She used to make a big song and dance ahout how she had no extended family on her mums side and she loved spending time together as a family.
The wedding invites turned up. My mum and dad were invited all day. Me and my sister and our partners were invited to the evening and my sisters children weren't invited. Her reasoning was that children weren't invited. My mum and dad saw it as a kick in the teeth for the years and years of hospitality. Me and my sister said straight away we couldn't attend as at the time none of us drove and it was 50 miles away. Mum and dad stewed for months on it but were thinking of going to not cause a falling out. On the day my dad decided he was too angry and they didn't go. Probably a good thing as when they got there the place was full of her friends kids. No one has spoken to each other for over 3 years. All because of a wedding!
I'm getting married in January. There will be 2 witnesses present and that's it. No bickering about some people having preference over others as no one is invited. To think people spend thousands on these days as well is incredible when you think about it.

Money_maker

leighavfc wrote: »

Agree here totally. Wife wants me to go regardless as she knows how close me and groom are. No pressure on me other than do i think its right or wrong to go without her.. thank you for reading what i have wrote and actually understanding me fully!

Is she your wife or partner? You started off calling her your partner and somewhere along the line you have changed it to wife. Small detail but as other posters have made reference to the 'vows you made to her' is she actually your wife or not?

POPPYOSCAR

Mummy2cheekymonkeys wrote: »

This is very similar to the situation with my dad and uncle. My cousin turned up with save the dates for all of us. Her and her fiance and my uncle (her dad) would come to ours every Christmas for dinner. She used to make a big song and dance ahout how she had no extended family on her mums side and she loved spending time together as a family.
The wedding invites turned up. My mum and dad were invited all day. Me and my sister and our partners were invited to the evening and my sisters children weren't invited. Her reasoning was that children weren't invited. My mum and dad saw it as a kick in the teeth for the years and years of hospitality. Me and my sister said straight away we couldn't attend as at the time none of us drove and it was 50 miles away. Mum and dad stewed for months on it but were thinking of going to not cause a falling out. On the day my dad decided he was too angry and they didn't go. Probably a good thing as when they got there the place was full of her friends kids. No one has spoken to each other for over 3 years. All because of a wedding!
I'm getting married in January. There will be 2 witnesses present and that's it. No bickering about some people having preference over others as no one is invited. To think people spend thousands on these days as well is incredible when you think about it.

Good for you!

That is what we did.

'Children' were there, our own and they were our witnesses.