Should I ask OH to leave?

Kurt_Death

My daughter was out of nappies at 2 yrs old (day and night) I think the mother needs to look to the part she has played in this, she has had 2 years to get that child out of nappies, very poor parenting.

Kimitatsu

Kurt_Death wrote: »

My daughter was out of nappies at 2 yrs old (day and night) I think the mother needs to look to the part she has played in this, she has had 2 years to get that child out of nappies, very poor parenting.

Oh get over yourself! Every child is different and they all get to differing milestones at differing ages. she wont be in a nappy by the time she goes to school and she will sort it out for herself.

I agree with the others on here that it is likely to have an emotional triggger - when my wx left my DS1 took to wetting the bed again for a short time. We got along with it and now at 10 he never wets the bed because he is happy and well adjusted.

The rest of us I am afraid are not perfect parents on here - something you will have to learn to live with if you are sticking around.

Catblue

Kurt_Death wrote: »

My daughter was out of nappies at 2 yrs old (day and night) I think the mother needs to look to the part she has played in this, she has had 2 years to get that child out of nappies, very poor parenting.

Strange that you don't have any comment to make on the parenting skills of the dad in this situation.

Or is it just women that you like to denigrate? :rolleyes:

icklejulez

Kurt_Death wrote: »

My daughter was out of nappies at 2 yrs old (day and night) I think the mother needs to look to the part she has played in this, she has had 2 years to get that child out of nappies, very poor parenting.

My fist child was too out of nappies when she was two but my son who has been brouht up in exactly the same way will be in nappies for a good while yet and he is two. Are you saying I am a bad parent to my first child???

ailuro2

Hi Nonnythemouse- how are you today?

Did things get any clearer after a night's sleep- sometimes things we aren't sure about seem more obvious in the morning.

Kurt_Death

Yes, any parent with a 4 year old in nappies should be visited by the social services IMO and the child removed, its a type of abuse and there is no need for it, just poor lazy parenting.

Gale_10

Kurt,

Its not poor lazy parenting, its not like that episode of supernanny where the family couldn't be bothered to deal with the children learning to be clean at night.

The little girl can't get used to doing a poo on the toilet - probably because her little mind is disturbed by the violence and abuse thats going on in the household.

Its just her way of expressing her feelings, at four she doesn't have the verbal skills to say *I hate it when Daddy is cruel to my brother, and it frightens me!*

As you will know, they are sensitive creatures, and you have to learn to understand the non-verbal clues.

Its quite possible you know that Kurts (Cobain) dodgy stomach/IBS was linked to his parents marriage breakdown.

HTH

Gale

nonnythemouse

Thank you for all your replies, they moved me to tears, you are very caring people and I'm very grateful.

I spoke to OH about what happened when he was calmer, he won't go to counselling or anger management classes but has agreed to read a book on teenage parenting, so that's a start I suppose.

In the long term I am definately going to take the kids and leave him but need to get some things sorted out (job etc). At times he can be an ok parent so it's not all bad. But if it happens again I'll leave straight away with the kids - no second chances.

With the nappies, little one was dry and out of nappies at age 2, except for when she needs a no. 2, then she goes and gets a nappy and takes it off afterwards. Health visitor says it's quite a common problem, apparently lots of little ones don't like the splash of the loo with no. 2's (sorry too much info I know). She prefers the alternative of a nappy for a few seconds and is a very determined little girl when she wants something. I was waiting for her to get settled at school before seriously tackling it. Now that she's at school I've got a number of ideas to encourage her to use the loo (bribery with pink shoes being one of them!).

Thanks again for all your ideas, they're really helped and are much appreciated.

Em
xxx

tightrs

Catblue wrote: »

Strange that you don't have any comment to make on the parenting skills of the dad in this situation.

Or is it just women that you like to denigrate? :rolleyes:

these threads nearly always denigrate men which on this occasion might be correct but is not always the case.the ops marriage sounds as if it died years ago and they should not stay together for the children,also he does sound a nasty piece of work but he is not on here to defend himself.i am not saying the op is telling lies but usually in these cases there are 3 sides to the story hers,his and the truth

Kurt_Death

With the nappies, little one was dry and out of nappies at age 2, except for when she needs a no. 2, then she goes and gets a nappy and takes it off afterwards. Health visitor says it's quite a common problem, apparently lots of little ones don't like the splash of the loo with no. 2's (sorry too much info I know). She prefers the alternative of a nappy for a few seconds and is a very determined little girl when she wants something. I was waiting for her to get settled at school before seriously tackling it. Now that she's at school I've got a number of ideas to encourage her to use the loo (bribery with pink shoes being one of them!).

maybe you could try a cat litter tray?