New neighbour noise

ska_lover

LunaLovegood wrote: »

We've always been neighbourly with everyone round us. This street in particular e.g. borrowing garden tools and the kids all go out and play together etc. just these guys literally never seem to leave the house and havent introduced themselves to anyone.

I only know her name because I took in a parcel for them before they had properly moved in and when I went in with it and the guy answered I said 'Im XXXX by the way and my husband is XXXX if you ever need anything'...no reply other than a mumbled 'thanks' from the guy. Don't know his name

Not everyone is as socially adept as you obviously are.

SO WHAT if they don't leave the house or want to get neighbourly with you??? Seriously you are gagging to judge them for every single move they make or don't make.... I think you need to have a look at yourself OP

LunaLovegood

You say so what if they dont want to be neighbourly..yet most of the advice I have been about THEIR lack of consideration for noise has been for ME to be more neighbourly and considerate towards them :rotfl:

Also I'm too judgemental for commenting on them never taking a 3 year old out of the house..yet I'm being told I need to get out more even though we do both go to work and I was going to uni..but thats ok for other posters to say to me :rotfl:

This forum does make me laugh sometimes.

badmemory

LunaLovegood wrote: »

and when she does she wears a surgical mask

And there I think you have it, the whole reason for them not going out, not wanting to mix, maybe for him not working, he could even be taking compassionate leave from his job. In my leaping to conclusions mode, I would say the chemo she's had has left her immune system compromised. They are living in a very scary world where even the common cold could be a major problem.

This is not going to go on forever. I really do not mean this harshly & know that it is really bothering you, but please avoid complaints to the landlord they have enough troubles, just try walking a mile in their shoes. They are not shoes I would want to be in.

Morglin

The child may be unsettled and reacting to the tension in the home - serious illness, such as Cancer, brings unbelievable stress, and kids pick up on it.

It could be they have no other support, so the guy is doing all the caring (and for a carer, life can be pretty tiring, especially with a stressed toddler thrown into the mix).

I would ignore/alleviate the noise with headphones or the library, try and be friendly, and not make assumptions.

Count your blessings, and don't add to their stress with reporting them - their situation must be awful.

Lin.

efes_shareholder

Personally I would just knock and tell her politely that the levels of noise from the kid is constantly high and although you appreicate it isn't always easy to keep noise levels down where children and tantrums are concerned , let her know that you are exposed to them and they do cause you some inconvenience
she may be unaware that you are exposed to it and knowing you are may be enough to at least try and keep it down where she can
if you offend her , so what ! At least you have told her and arent looking for ways to politely drop it in !

pollypenny

I have sympathy with the OP. We scrimped and saved for our first property, a flat as we couldn!!!8217;t afford a house in the area. It was great until someone moved in upstairs.

They had no carpets, the woman bawled at the toddler all today and the husband rolled home from his bar job, drunk almost every night.

We sold and moved so we each had a 20 mile commute. OH paid for a lift and I drove.

OP, try the Easter egg idea and take the chance to mention the noise, while showing some sympathy at the same time.

ska_lover

LunaLovegood wrote: »

Also I'm too judgemental for commenting on them never taking a 3 year old out of the house.

I find it abhorrent that you see this as reason to attack her and her partner - well it is not a reason is it, it's an excuse.

Does it really surprise you that taking the child out is not top of their priorities?

Detroit

LunaLovegood wrote: »

You say so what if they dont want to be neighbourly..yet most of the advice I have been about THEIR lack of consideration for noise has been for ME to be more neighbourly and considerate towards them :rotfl:

Also I'm too judgemental for commenting on them never taking a 3 year old out of the house..yet I'm being told I need to get out more even though we do both go to work and I was going to uni..but thats ok for other posters to say to me :rotfl:

This forum does make me laugh sometimes.

I think most people are offering suggestions as to what you can realistically do to improve your situation.

You can't force your neighbours to live in a way that you approve of and is convenient for you and its highly unlikely there is any official or legal route that can be taken to resolve the noise issue.

Given that, people are focusing on the things that may help that are within your control, such as building a better relationship, taking yourself out of the situation and reviewing your attitudes to see the situation from a more tolerant perspective.

You may not find these suggestions are helpful, but to laugh and be sarcastic to people who have offered them is discourteous.

batg

I don't see a fixation with benefits. I see a woman who has to listen to a kid howl 24/7 that never gets taken out of the house to play or learn. If the boyfriend is not working, what is wrong with him getting off his backside and giving his girlfriend a break by taking the kid out so his g/f gets a rest and the kid finds out there is more in life than the 4 walls in her house.

Why should the OP have to wear earphones in her own house?

batg

attack?
in what way, she's just trying to paint a picture of the neighbours so people might be able to offer some constructive advice.

Some people on here are very judgmental. I think the only "decent" advice offered by anyone is the earphones, though why she should have to wear them in her own house when it's someone else's kid making the racket and causing the noise I don't know.