We’d like to remind Forumites to please avoid political debate on the Forum.
This is to keep it a safe and useful space for MoneySaving discussions. Threads that are – or become – political in nature may be removed in line with the Forum’s rules. Thank you for your understanding.
📨 Have you signed up to the Forum's new Email Digest yet? Get a selection of trending threads sent straight to your inbox daily, weekly or monthly!
Is it weird wanting to remain single?
Comments
-
Op , if all your life consists of is not particularly interesting work (I guessed it was not as you said no word about it and your earnings must be quite low if you have £300 left after bills) , gym, watching tv and playing xbox then indeed including female in it would result in more expenses , not that much because you would subsidise the female but because you would be doing other things which likely require money spend.
It is very understandable to me why you could prefer live the way you do. It is secure, protected and stable bubble. Or shell. Hopefully it is just a stage though as there is much more to life than what you described and limiting it to those activities cuts many/most positive experiences off it.
Person one , live organisms programmed for reproducing and ensuring passing on the genes they have. You have different preferences that overridden this primal instinct. Your parents on another hand have it switched on as most others. So it probably hurts them to the core that they did not succeed in gene passover as it stops at you.The word "dilemma" comes from Greek where "di" means two and "lemma" means premise. Refers usually to difficult choice between two undesirable options.
Often people seem to use this word mistakenly where "quandary" would fit better.0 -
I don't think it's weird at all and I think I am at the stage of happily single.
I spent my younger years in a long term relationship and then he left me when I was 29 with two very small kids (one being 2 months old).
It took me years to be happy, but I think I am there. I like the idea of my house, my money, can do what I want etc.
Sometimes I get lonely and think there should be more to life (i.e. my evenings are quite lonely as it's not like I can go out with small children), but at the moment, I would say I'm content and not bothered about finding a partner.
It gets mentioned sometimes and my answer usually is "I've got what I need out of a man," i.e. my kids! Haha.
However, this may change in the future, but I'm not sure I'll ever desperately be on the lookout. If it happens, it happens. I think of my ex and how whenever I mention something about the kids, it's always, "I'll get back to you as I just need to ask....." Geez, I don't want to have ask permission from anyone like that now I'm in my mid 30s!Pink Sproglettes born 2008 and 2010
Mortgages (End 2017) - £180,235.03
(End 2021) - £131,215.25 DID IT!!!
(End 2022) - Target £116,213.810 -
BTW, no-one ever has to justify their lifestyle preferences to anyone. The OP (and others) could just nod and smile rather than trying to persuade the other person that they're quite happy as they are, TYVM, and don't intend to find a boy/girlfriend / get married / have kids etc etc etc.
MIL was never given the chance to ask when we were getting married as we sprang it on her before she was expecting it, but the comments about babies started soon afterwards. "I saw a lovely toy train today but I had no-one to buy it for" was one classic. She's now started wondering when she's going to get great grandchildren, as 'all her friends' have at least one. I just ask if she REALLY thinks the boys are ready to be parents? One is happily 'travelling' and has no g/f and no plans to settle down; another has only recently got a g/f who I have NOT mentioned to MIL so how he's supposed to reproduce I'm not sure; and the third is still doing his PhD here while his delightful g/f is working elsewhere in Europe, so why they'd want a baby is unclear ...
Mind you her response to 'do you think they're ready?' is to say that she supposes they should get married first ...
She is a lovely lady in all other respects, so smiling and nodding is definitely the way to go. As it happens, I'd love grandchildren myself, but that's no reason for the boys to oblige ... :rotfl:Signature removed for peace of mind0 -
Person one , live organisms programmed for reproducing and ensuring passing on the genes they have. You have different preferences that overridden this primal instinct. Your parents on another hand have it switched on as most others. So it probably hurts them to the core that they did not succeed in gene passover as it stops at you.
Aw, thanks. What a lovely thing to say.0 -
Person one , live organisms programmed for reproducing and ensuring passing on the genes they have. You have different preferences that overridden this primal instinct. Your parents on another hand have it switched on as most others. So it probably hurts them to the core that they did not succeed in gene passover as it stops at you.
How do you know it stops at person one? They might have brothers and sisters who are "reproducing" :rotfl:left the forum due to trolling/other nonsense
28.3.20160 -
Choked on my tea at this. What a delightful expression.Person one , live organisms programmed for reproducing and ensuring passing on the genes they have. You have different preferences that overridden this primal instinct. Your parents on another hand have it switched on as most others. So it probably hurts them to the core that they did not succeed in gene passover as it stops at you. So it probably hurts them to the core that they did not succeed in gene passover as it stops at you.
And of course this is OT, as such 'hurt' it is about not having children, not choosing to remain single.
I would suggest it is much more likely the natural parental fear of not being any to comfort /help offspring when they are no longer around in times of unexpected need and a reflection of their own fear of being widowed/how would they cope alone and /or how much they have enjoyed having a partner. Might be none of these of course.I try to take one day at a time, but sometimes several days attack me at once0 -
Brighton_belle wrote: »Choked on my tea at this. What a delightful expression.
And of course this is OT, as such 'hurt' it is about not having children, not choosing to remain single.
I would suggest it is much more likely the natural parental fear of not being any to comfort /help offspring when they are no longer around in times of unexpected need and a reflection of their own fear of being widowed/how would they cope alone and /or how much they have enjoyed having a partner. Might be none of these of course.
I know right? People do think that way though, more than I would've believed before it became relevant to me.
My parents met in their teens and have been sickeningly happy ever since. I think they just struggle to understand how I ended up so different to them in this respect! Frustrating at times, annoying to be viewed as an object of pity, and hurtful that they seem to think I'm lying to them about being fine on my own. Its something a lot of single or childfree women have to put up with though, not just me.0 -
Person one , live organisms programmed for reproducing and ensuring passing on the genes they have. You have different preferences that overridden this primal instinct. Your parents on another hand have it switched on as most others. So it probably hurts them to the core that they did not succeed in gene passover as it stops at you.Brighton_belle wrote: »Choked on my tea at this. What a delightful expression.
And of course this is OT, as such 'hurt' it is about not having children, not choosing to remain single.
I would suggest it is much more likely the natural parental fear of not being any to comfort /help offspring when they are no longer around in times of unexpected need and a reflection of their own fear of being widowed/how would they cope alone and /or how much they have enjoyed having a partner. Might be none of these of course.Person_one wrote: »Aw, thanks. What a lovely thing to say.
Struggling to see why this is a 'delightful' thing to say.................Why is it nice or good, that the parents are 'hurt to the core?' :huh:How do you know it stops at person one? They might have brothers and sisters who are "reproducing" :rotfl:
That's what I thought!!!0 -
It's sarcasm Petra. Used because I found it an astonishingly peculiar thing to say.Struggling to see why this is a 'delightful' thing to say.................Why is it nice or good, that the parents are 'hurt to the core?' :huh:
That's what I thought!!!I try to take one day at a time, but sometimes several days attack me at once0 -
The only people who would find it weird would be those who compare it to their own insecurities and try to make their lives look better.
As for reproduction, that has nothing to do with relationships / marriage / living together. It can be done through one physical act, so there is not an argument there.
In fact, I think it's very healthy to be single.Never again will the wolf get so close to my door :eek:0
This discussion has been closed.
Confirm your email address to Create Threads and Reply
Categories
- All Categories
- 355.5K Banking & Borrowing
- 254.8K Reduce Debt & Boost Income
- 456K Spending & Discounts
- 248.1K Work, Benefits & Business
- 605.5K Mortgages, Homes & Bills
- 178.9K Life & Family
- 263.3K Travel & Transport
- 1.5M Hobbies & Leisure
- 16.1K Discuss & Feedback
- 37.7K Read-Only Boards