Do I hire a private investigator

RAS

Tell me - one of my historic couples both led about their ages when they married and the only correct things about his details were his first name, surname and occupation. His (half/full) siblings gave the same lies when they married.

In another (recent) case I discovered that the parents had a first child of the same name as my enquirer, who had died in infancy. There appears to be no birth cert for my enquirer.

ManofLeisure_2

RAS wrote: »

Tell me - one of my historic couples both led about their ages when they married and the only correct things about his details were his first name, surname and occupation. His (half/full) siblings gave the same lies when they married.

In another (recent) case I discovered that the parents had a first child of the same name as my enquirer, who had died in infancy. There appears to be no birth cert for my enquirer.

I think it's pretty safe to say that if the guy in question supplied info which is absolutely false - there's little chance of finding him through using the indexes. When one or two facts are certain, then that is a different scenario (as in your first example).

Guest101

RAS wrote: »

Tell me - one of my historic couples both led about their ages when they married and the only correct things about his details were his first name, surname and occupation. His (half/full) siblings gave the same lies when they married.

In another (recent) case I discovered that the parents had a first child of the same name as my enquirer, who had died in infancy. There appears to be no birth cert for my enquirer.

I thought coroners issued certificates for newborn mortalities?

But if born abroad then there would be no record - ie mine

Mojisola

Guest101 wrote: »

I thought coroners issued certificates for newborn mortalities?

Only if the parents went and registered the death.

BucksLady

I'm sorry to hear this has happened to you OP - you must feel absolutely devastated.

I don't really have any advice I'm afraid, but in your shoes I would probably want to find out the truth. In particular - who the heck was he? The Electoral Registers might be a good start. Failing that I think I would speak to an organisation which finds missing people. They might just be able to point you in the right direction.

rachy182

Cant you remember any of the details he gave you when you tried to insure the car. I know when i try to insure mine especially if i go through a comparison site i need name, address,date of birth, car reg, how much car is worth, where it is kept, how long have i been driving, years no claims, if you have an accident, criminal offenses, occupation etc. Besides name, dob and address it might not seem important but the rest would have had to make sense to fit in with the rest of his story. Maybe check out the address used and if he mentioned a school see if there's a facebook page for it.

moneyistooshorttomention

BucksLady wrote: »

I'm sorry to hear this has happened to you OP - you must feel absolutely devastated.

I don't really have any advice I'm afraid, but in your shoes I would probably want to find out the truth. In particular - who the heck was he? The Electoral Registers might be a good start. Failing that I think I would speak to an organisation which finds missing people. They might just be able to point you in the right direction.

That prompted a thought - ie "organisation which finds missing people". Don't the Salvation Army have some sort of tracing system for missing people??

EDIT; one quick google later - and yes they do.....

Guest101

This person does have some rights to disappear.

I think the child maintenance is the big issue. So the op should go to the cms with what they have. But beyond that it's not really on to track someone down- bit stalkerish?

moneyistooshorttomention

I doubt many of us would regard it as "stalkerish".

Whilst I follow the argument about him having a right to "disappear - this isn't a 5 minute wonder fling. Its a 4 year relationship/they were planning to get married/they have a child from it.

So - I don't see it that way at all. She has a right to know what she has spent the last 4 years of her life involved in totally against her will. That is - she was in the relationship voluntarily and they decided to have a child together and its entirely understandable someone would want to know just where their fianc! and father of their child had gone and why.

That would be a huge unresolved issue for both herself and her child to have hanging over their heads for the rest of their lives. At least if she tries to find him then she can feel a lot more "at peace" for having made the effort - even if it doesn't succeed.

Just think of the various stories many of us have read about someone's husband/wife/child just vanishing and years later that person is still waiting for "closure" and hoping the missing person will reappear.

Guest101

moneyistooshorttomention wrote: »

I doubt many of us would regard it as "stalkerish".

Whilst I follow the argument about him having a right to "disappear - this isn't a 5 minute wonder fling. Its a 4 year relationship/they were planning to get married/they have a child from it.

So - I don't see it that way at all. She has a right to know what she has spent the last 4 years of her life involved in totally against her will. That is - she was in the relationship voluntarily and they decided to have a child together and its entirely understandable someone would want to know just where their fianc! and father of their child had gone and why.

That would be a huge unresolved issue for both herself and her child to have hanging over their heads for the rest of their lives. At least if she tries to find him then she can feel a lot more "at peace" for having made the effort - even if it doesn't succeed.

Just think of the various stories many of us have read about someone's husband/wife/child just vanishing and years later that person is still waiting for "closure" and hoping the missing person will reappear.

I get the OPs desire for closure, but with all the breaches of trust in the relationship, what if this person disappeared for the 'right' reasons?