My OH is in hospital in intensive care

RuthnJasper

duchy wrote: »

You know what ..... If they think you ending up in hospital too through exhaustion is a good idea - Stuff em !

You do what is right for you and your family.
If you need a day off -take it.

Absolutely spot on. They and their lack of understanding can b*gg*r right off. You need your rest and have reached a point where you are able to take it. Sleep well honeybee - you have more than earned it. xxx

sooty&sweep

Hi
There is nothing stopping your in laws or other friends/relatives visiting your OH without you.
Your oh is going to need support for a long time so you need to look after yourself if you are going to be able to support him.
You are helping your oh by keeping everything else together to come home to.
Jen

mummyroysof3

Nothing helpful to say but just wanted to send my best wishes to you and your family x

HPoirot

Hang on in there Victory. As others have said, you will need a lot of physical strength and courage to look after your OH once he is home, so you really should replenish your energy now whenever you can.

gettingtheresometime

Tiredness, worry and lack of proper food always makes me more crochetedy (sorry cant spell it right!) and perhaps sees slight when none is intended and also perhaps a little less diplomatic.

Perhaps someone could take them aside and tell them that you need a day off if only to do the boring household stuff and that if needs be the hospital will ring.

I'm sure that they don't mean to criticise and really do know that a day off is in Victory's best interests

TiddlyPom

Some hospitals have almost like an in-house B&B run by the friends of the hospital. Normally on the grounds and it's for people like you so you can sleep over and not drive back and forth two days on the trot. They normally charge but it's a nominal amount. Is there anything like that available at the hospital your OH is in? May be worth asking?

duchy

Nice idea but Victory has a son who is going to school every day so not awfully practical- she needs to be at home. I agree these types of places can be a godsend but often arent useful to people who also have other responsibilities.

TiddlyPom wrote: »

Some hospitals have almost like an in-house B&B run by the friends of the hospital. Normally on the grounds and it's for people like you so you can sleep over and not drive back and forth two days on the trot. They normally charge but it's a nominal amount. Is there anything like that available at the hospital your OH is in? May be worth asking?

victory

Thank you for all the support, I have felt some proper sick feeling guilt today and have been very on edge all day but never went, for me not going the inlaws chose not to go, rang the hospital and they said that he was in and out, having all sorts of tests, was suffering bad with his pain management control, very restless and aggresive and that there was nothing we could do.

My eldest is taking me tomorrow with youngest and anyone else to go.

victory

sooty&sweep wrote: »

Hi
There is nothing stopping your in laws or other friends/relatives visiting your OH without you.
Your oh is going to need support for a long time so you need to look after yourself if you are going to be able to support him.
You are helping your oh by keeping everything else together to come home to.
Jen

From what I know some of his work colleagues were going as they live much closer to the hospital but no relatives went, as I know he would have had a hard job knowing who was there today.

victory

harrys_nan wrote: »

victory, if your in-laws don't want him to not have any visitors for the 1 day, tell them to stay longer so they can go and visit your hubby after all he is their son. You do really need to have a rest because your in this for the long haul not just a visit to the hospital each day, you need to be
fit for when he comes home, x

The inlaws are staying until they move OH, how long that will be no one seems to know, it changes every day, they are exhausted though, nan has gone for a lie down already, not feeling very well. All the trauma of the week catching up.