Is he being immature?

ska_lover

OH god. Sulkers. I hate them too

OP you made an error. A thoughtless act - doesn't make you a terrible person. He has been with you for quite some time, so would realise (one would hope) that it is out of character. What is happening after that, is all of his choosing.

If he is actually seriously rethinking your entire relationship because of this one 'misdemeanour' then he does, honestly, sound rather controlling to me. You didn't kill his pet budgie or something

He is choosing to make it into a 'big thing'. Is sulking going to be how he acts ever time he is upset? Eeeek

Sulking and the silent treatment are a rejection. They mess with your mind. Before you know it, your head is a mess and the original problem has escalated to something completely different and resentment filters in on both sides. It is head games.

Hopefully it will be a one off? I couldn't be with someone who reacted like this every time something didn't go his way. You didn't say thanks, it really isn't the end of the world. People who love each other, forgive each other

jaylee3

I agree with the majority here that the B/F is being a horrible childish brat. I also agree with the posters who say that they hear alarm bells with the way he is treating the OP. I would not ever ever get into a relationship with a man like this. I would bail now if I were you OP. You have done nothing wrong at all.

Oh and as for January20's comments.

So, am I the only one then who does things for people because I want to make them happy

(I dare not put capitals for fear of being accused of shouting!)

Don't let yourself be ordered about by the forum police. Post how you want to! People have a go at the way people post when they have nothing constructive or intelligent to add to the debate

raven83

The boyfriend sounds like his behaviour is boarding on passive aggressive and as for the OP, well she forgot to say "Thank you" for which she apologised for, sounds like he making a big deal out of something trivial, IMO.

God help, if the OP did something really bad, in fact I think it is his behaviour that should be being questioned here, not hers.

System

DUTR wrote: »

however me personally I adopt a policy of why do something for nothing, when I can do nothing for nothing?

What an absolutely horrible attitude to have.

jaylee3

Judi wrote: »

What an absolutely horrible attitude to have.

Agree. :T

Carmina-Piranha_2

CKgeordieinlondon wrote: »

I'm wondering if the fact it was a day out with his friends and family is a factor. We're all a little bit more concious of what our partners are like, in front of others.

That aside I can't abide sulkers and martyrs.

Reminds me of those people who refuse all help in the kitchen, then complain that people don't appreciate how much effort it all took.

He doesn't sound like a keeper.

Me too ... did you get on with everyone, and was it the first time you'd met them?

Did you talk to them, or did you try to get him to hang back and give you his full attention?

The first time my son's girlfriend met us she was really shy and awkward, and kept 'going mardy' from the point of view of other people. I could see that she was really shy and just wanted it to be him and her in a little bubble where she wasn't 'on display' as it were, but others thought she was having strops and being a drama llama. My son understood because he finds social situations terrifying too.

SuzieSue

I couldn't have a relationship with someone who bears grudges, life is much too short.

The OP should of course have thanked him and I can understand why he was upset. However, he should have accepted her apology (we all make mistakes) and given her the benefit of the doubt and seen if the same thing happened again. If it did, then the OP is obviously ungrateful and unappreciative so he would have every right to consider his relationship with her.

However, he has shown himself to be very unforgiving by the way he has reacted and I think the OP should seriously consider whether she wants a relationship with someone like that. I know that I wouldn't.

FBaby

Agree with HPoirot. I take it from the OP that the guy is assessing where the relationship is going and whether he wants to take things forward. This situation has made him wonder about OP attitude. It might indeed very well be another issue amongst others that makes him have doubts. I think that's why OP is panicking because his putting some distance is not him sulking but questioning the relationship.

Billie-S

If the OP has any sense. She will end it now with this clearly very passive-aggressive young man.

I see nothing but gloom and doom and unhappiness ahead for her, if she stays with him. She has nothing to feel guilty or bad about. He should hang his head in shame for the way he is behaving.

He has displayed very childish, sulky, brattish behaviour, and yes, as some have said, bordering on bullying.

[Deleted User]

I won't hijack the thread. Different situation but I'm being ignored too. I sent a text to my boyfriend with regards to removing stuff out of my home as he wasn't respecting my home or what I said. He doesn't live with me but stays at weekends. It took him two days to reply to my text . He said he was busy. No ones that busy that they can't reply to a text. He's now again not text me and to be honest I don't care. I'm not analyzing it... If someone doesn't respect you by ignoring you after a few months into a relationship then that shows you what you've got to put up with. You said you were sorry you didn't thank him. Let him be and carry on with your life as normal. There's nothing you can do now....