advice please

nichere

krisspy444
i do not argue or bicker with her over this or any issues that we have as we have argued and said everything a thousand times in the past.
and my prioraty is my son and my new wife and daughter all i want is my son to be a part of my new life.

nichere

walton my child is born i have a daughter and she knows but she dont want our son to know yet!!

Curious_George_2

nichere wrote: »

curious george i reacted in this way because he stated that i f****d off and now i want my son in my life now that i have a new one, and that i was on here arranging to meet women off this site behind my g/friends wifes back.
if he had read this i have never stated that i f***d off and never seen my son i have always seen my son however since last sept this has been in his mums house which is unfair as all i want tyo do is spend quality time with him.
i reacted to this and this alone how someone can come on here and imply that i was this that and the other about my son and my now wife maybe he should have kept those opinions to himself if he did not now all the facts about the weekends away that are organised on here first

yes, but cant you see that without any real back story this quote from you

i should have my son at weekends and on holidays already but i didnt pursue this when we got divorced as he was still only a baby and needed to be with his mum and not with me when he was a baby

sounds a bit like you did f*** off!
he was only reacting to something you had said.....

every story like this has two victims, it just depends what side of the story you hear.... you must be able to see that??
if your ex had been on here starting a thread about her ex husband who didnt pursue access when they first split, who after they had divorced had got married and had a baby with someone else almost in secrecy, and now wouldnt give her something as basic as his address because his new wife wouldnt like it.... i imagine she would have got a lot of sympathy and people asking what her ex (you) had to hide?

im sorry but you cant come on here, pour out part of a story to complete strangers and then attack people for having thier say!
you say he should have kept his opinion to himself... why should he when you asked?
it really does look like your only after answers that sympathise with you and in a broad spectrum of people as we have on this board, that just aint gonna happen.

TheWaltons_3

nichere wrote: »

she dosnt get csa i pay more than the csa say that i should!!!
so i am not allowed a life then but she is doh.
i am not after anything on here as you put it a light bulb in my head syndrome.
no why should i slag my ex wife down!! i only put this in so people like you would understand my situation and stop thinking that it is always the mans fault that is the problem every one says oh its the mans fault all the time as it must be HIM and not the mother who might be wrong here this might happen to you one day but of course your life must be so perfect that you will always be right.

My life is far from perfect. As a new wife and a step-mum to a child a little older than your own, I know how damn hard it can be on the Father when the ex demands that he see his child at her house only... only when it suits... demands cash through the door with the Curtains closed and blah blah blah... I also know the emotions your new wife will be going through and yes it is hard.

But as a Mother also, I would be furious if my husband was coming and taking my children off and not even giving a contact address. She isn't being unreasonable at all - you are and your new pregnant wife are.

Give her the address, bend over backwards for you son, and pray to God that little boy will want to know you when he is older. There are enough damaged kids around missing fathers.

nichere

i didnt f off as you put it i carried on seeing my son as i have stated several times on here before and always have i only never demanded having my son then baby stop with me at weekends etc but i still seen him as we agreed i have not said anything to the contrary.
i dont really care what you people think of me i KNOW i am a good dad to my son and do all that i can to help his mother and him.
as far as sympathy i have never and never do want sympathy and yes you are entitled to your views but also dont think that i am not entitled to my views about you when you say things about me.

nichere

my ex has a contact address where i always took my son when i was allowed to take him.
my new wife is no longer pregnant as we now have a daughter as i have said

krispy444

nichere wrote: »

krisspy444
i do not argue or bicker with her over this or any issues that we have as we have argued and said everything a thousand times in the past.
and my prioraty is my son and my new wife and daughter all i want is my son to be a part of my new life.

By not giving her your address you are arguing, even if its not out loud in front of your child.

As I said before if your priority is your son, new wife and daughter then let her have your address then maybe you will get what you want.

Although I know there are some vindictive ex wives I don't think she is being unreasonable wanting to know the address. I wouldn't let my kids go not knowing......

By the way even if you don't believe it you have my sympathy, but i can see both sides to this, whereas you are too close and cannot. Good luck

kenshaz

My advice would be to listen to positive and not negative posts ,they are not standing in your shoes and therefore they should not judge.Who knows what life throws at you and those who criticize might one day find themselves in a similar situation then how will they react.
Sometimes it can be a mistake to open your heart on an open forum,there are all types of people reading this and some just want a reaction ,that is what they enjoy another's worries and they want to stir you into a reaction.
The recent posts really give an insight and I am glad that you are now with some-one who loves you ,use that as a base and solve this problem ,it will give you
It is also important for your daughter to build a relationship with your son ,they need to bond .

nichere

my ex nows where i would take our son she knows i would not hurt him or her in any way this is just her way of playing a controlling game over me as she has done in the past.
all i origanlly asked was she legally entitled to stop me taking our son out of her house?
no she is not however i must reiterate this fact to her by means of a letter saying that i have no intntion of taking my son to my new address without an agreement where i would give her my new address and this is not a problem however after almost a year of my son not being allowed to go any where with me the last thing i would do to him is take him with me to my new aaddress this will take time, i have no problem with that all i want is to take my son and have time with him on our own, and slowly introduce him to his new sister when HE was ready and he asked for this.

nichere

i would say thank you kenshaz but i would get ridiculed for saying thank you to you as i only want to hear what i want to hear (apparently)