advice please

Gingernutmeg

It is always hurtful for a child to find out that they have a new step-sibling, no matter when or how they find out. It's very dangerous to assume that your son has no idea about the child or your conflict with his mother, children tend to know a lot more about a situation than warring parents give them credit for - I know that when my parents were divorcing (I was aged about six when it began) people were surprised at how much my brother and I knew and understood about the situation, even though they had tried to hide things from us. Apparently I have a half-brother somewhere, although my father never told us, we found out through gossip and hearsay. It's not at all nice to feel that someone doesn't want you to be a part of their life, and don't think that children don't feel this, because they do.

nichere

jpvic cant say thank you for obvious reasons but thank you.
we will give the address to a solicitor or some other form of authority unless a judge stated otherwise (dont want to go to court and upset my son) i dont want this issue forced this way unless i have to.
and gingernut i can imagine it was not nice finding out that you had a half brother that way and i dont want this for my son and yes i know he knows whats going on and i can imagine it is hard for my son to understand why he can not go with his father anymore like he used to i have no idea what she said to him was the reason for this happening last sept when she stopped me taking him with me when i go and see him.
it hurts me when i think about him coming home from nursery and that kind of everyday stuff people take for granted what they have until it has gone(my ex walked out on me not the other way round) a couple of months ago he fractured his elbow and i wasnt there to cuddle him this broke my heart sometimes i lay in bed wondering about him and how he is and hope he is ok.
this is hard to put as some people on here just think that i am after sympathy and every thing else but im not i am just trying to make you understand how much i love and adore my son but the answer is not just give her the address this is not that black and white just like life isnt.

Scarlett1

nichere wrote: »

all i origanlly asked was she legally entitled to stop me taking our son out of her house?

are you seriously thinking of snatching your son from his home ?

I do sympathise that you probably had a !!!!!! time with your ex, but when you say the above things any sympathy falls to the roadside

what exactly do you think your ex wife can take off your new wife ? it might be her house in name but as you are married to her its also your house, I think you are way too paranoid, you are divorced so she isnt entitled to anything of you and your new wife's, have you been listening to horror stories from somewhere else ?

btw your ex isnt a nobody to your wife, she is the mother of her step-son (your son), so a bit of respect wouldnt go amiss.

I dont know how anyone on this board is able to help you, you have now sought legal advice so thats the way forward

nichere

are you seriously thinking of snatching your son from his home ?
are you for real????
of course i am not thinking of snatching my son from his home!!!
i dont even feel like responding to such an obsured remark although i have.
i do not want yours or anyone elses sympathy did i ask for it???

nichere

i have only asked where i stand legally from my soliciter and he has said that i need a letter stating what i said earlier on here to be sent to my ex wife and of course i wanted legal advice otherwise a few more months will have gone by and still my situation with my son will not have changed and he would still not be able to see his new step sister.
also people earn respect as i do as my sons father this works both ways you know and i have not slagged my ex wife down if i did then that was a mistake as i am human and sometimes we put or say things that may not have meant to have been said or wrote about in this case!!!!

bestpud

nichere

I think the majority on here cannot comprehend why you are refusing to give your address.

You say there are other issues and yet people can only offer their thoughts based upon the information given. If you can't give all the info (for whatever reason) then you just have to accept the advice you requested will reflect that lack of knowledge.

Really, I agree that this has been exhausted now and legal advice, where the solicitor will be in possession of the full facts, is your only option.

I'm not having a go at you in particular but i do find it astounding how many people ask for advice on here, get very defensive when not given the answer they wanted and then come out with all sorts of other things that they cannot divulge on a public forum and get uppity as they don't think they should have to! I always wonder why they asked in the first place! It seems obvious to me that people can only respond to what they see!

Scarlett1

nichere wrote: »

are you seriously thinking of snatching your son from his home ?
are you for real????
of course i am not thinking of snatching my son from his home!!!
i dont even feel like responding to such an obsured remark although i have.
i do not want yours or anyone elses sympathy did i ask for it???

so why are you asking is she legally entitled to stop you taking your son out of HER house you obviously know the answer from your solicitor and you have come on here asking for a 2nd opinion

you dont have my sympathy but your ex wife does, why dont you cut the agression and go round and talk to her and sort out an amicable agreement between you both so you can see your son, you ex obviously isnt trusting you to just take him to the grandparents and not onto your home afterwards where she dont have the address.

there is a 5 year old boy in the middle of this and all someone cares about is their ex not getting her hands on some bricks and mortar :mad:

Curious_George_2

seriously, you need to calm down,

re-read my last post on the previous page, i didnt say that you just "f***ed off" i was going over what somebody else and then you had said,
you sound so childish and bitter, and your starting to direct it at the people on here, if you carry on i doubt the rest of this thread will go your way.

and again i have to say, some of your posts are not that clear, its probably not helping, I dont want to sound patronising but maybe you should think about what you want to say rather than just writing it out like your speaking,
that would also give you a chance to consider what has been written instead of just getting over defensive and stroppy with peoples opinions which you originally asked for.

nichere

i asked for some advice on here before i got in contact with a solicitor!!
thought you might have sympathy with my ex thats fine thats upto you.
dont you think i have tried to be amicable and sort things out with my ex or just let this go on since sept??
i have my son for 5 hours it would be a 4 hour round trip so i dont think i would make it somehow.
and this is not about getting her hands on bricks and mortar as you put it this is just another one of her games that she plays as i said next month it would be something else as it always has been

bestpud

I personally have not sided with your ex but what I have done is try to give an objective viewpoint! Basically, I've tried to take the info you have given about her and say how i think it may be perceived by her.

Sometimes, being able to see from the other's viewpoint is the best way to find a solution in situations like this.