Girlfriend refusing to pay towards rent

~Chameleon~

*max* wrote: »

Well her friends can keep her then. You can't, and there is no reason you should!

The best thing to do IMO, if you can't afford the mortgage alone atm, would be to take in a lodger. Having her there staying rent-free means you can't do that and are losing out on the money a lodger could give you. So either she pays up or she goes to her friends' and you get a lodger. You don't want to risk losing your house for her sake when she's got hers sitting prettyand getting paid for while taking advantage of living with you rent-free.

Why does her being there prevent him getting in a lodger or two? They live in a four bedroomed house!

I do agree she should be contributing equally towards household costs, however, I don't think it's appropriate to actually charge her "rent" as such if you're in a relationship, otherwise she's just a lodger too.

FBaby

She is the most unselfish girl you could meet and saves whatever she can from her holiday job and allowance to pay her way where she can.

Then why accusing the poster's girlfriend of being selfish when you don't know her circumstances. Maybe if her parents could pay her way, they would do so, and then she wouldn't be selfish?

There are many reasons why someone might not be able to contribute 50% as expected, and expecting your partner of over 5 years to help during this time whilst they doesn't automatically make them selfish.

Fluffi

Regardless of the redundancies, individual property ownership and who has tenants/lodgers if a boyfriend asked me to pay rent I'd refuse.

I would insist on contributing to all other bills, electric, water, gas, food, insurance, broadband, council tax (the difference between single person and 2 person occupation) but I am not going to contribute to another person's mortgage unless they formally want to be my landlord or else we can have a formal agreement drawn up that recognises my contribution to the mortgage.

If a boyfriend wanted treat me as a lodger/tenant then route I'd leave him anyway.

getmore4less

~Chameleon~ wrote: »

Why does her being there prevent him getting in a lodger or two? They live in a four bedroomed house!

I do agree she should be contributing equally towards household costs, however, I don't think it's appropriate to actually charge her "rent" as such if you're in a relationship, otherwise she's just a lodger too.

This is the key to getting income get those rooms earning money.

Might be worth looking at somewhere like airBnB, for short term lodgers, rates tend to be higher and the work load higher on changeover(but not working have the time) the benefit is you have shorter term disruption get more money quicker and can stop/reduce occupancy when you get jobs.

Mojisola

Fluffi wrote: »

I am not going to contribute to another person's mortgage unless they formally want to be my landlord or else we can have a formal agreement drawn up that recognises my contribution to the mortgage.

If a boyfriend wanted treat me as a lodger/tenant then route I'd leave him anyway.

So if a BF moved into your flat and lived with you for years, you'd be happy paying the mortgage while he lived rent free all that time?

I'd want to pay my way - if not by contributing an amount each month which can lead to problems then by saving that amount and using it to pay for holidays for both of us or other joint things.

Once a couple become a "couple" rather than just BF/GF, the dynamics change and other things like joint ownership can be considered.

~Chameleon~

Mojisola wrote: »

So if a BF moved into your flat and lived with you for years, you'd be happy paying the mortgage while he lived rent free all that time?

Having seen someone lose the home they bought when they split up then no, I wouldn't want any boyfriend paying anything towards my mortgage. If however, we decided to get married/live together permanently then I'd rather sell up and buy a property in joint names.

Mojisola

~Chameleon~ wrote: »

Having seen someone lose the home they bought when they split up then no, I wouldn't want any boyfriend paying anything towards my mortgage. If however, we decided to get married/live together permanently then I'd rather sell up and buy a property in joint names.

There are ways to prevent a beneficial interest being gained on the property without one of the couple living rent free for years.

~Chameleon~

Mojisola wrote: »

There are ways to prevent a beneficial interest being gained on the property without one of the couple living rent free for years.

Who said anything about years? As I said, if it was a serious relationship in that I was contemplating spending the rest of my life with this person then I'd sell up and we'd buy a home together. And contributing to other living costs isn't exactly living "rent free" as you put it.

Mojisola

~Chameleon~ wrote: »

Who said anything about years? As I said, if it was a serious relationship in that I was contemplating spending the rest of my life with this person then I'd sell up and we'd buy a home together. And contributing to other living costs isn't exactly living "rent free" as you put it.

The OP's GF has already had a year of living rent free and wants that position to continue.

bouncydog1

FBaby wrote: »

Then why accusing the poster's girlfriend of being selfish when you don't know her circumstances. Maybe if her parents could pay her way, they would do so, and then she wouldn't be selfish?

There are many reasons why someone might not be able to contribute 50% as expected, and expecting your partner of over 5 years to help during this time whilst they doesn't automatically make them selfish.

I didn't accuse anyone of being selfish! I think the original posters girlfriend is having a laugh at his expense and he can do better as their relationship doesn't sound at all great. With regards to the point about my own daughter falling out with her boyfriend, if that happens we will help her sort out alternative accommodation. I agree there is good student accommodation but not all of it is, and it is very limited - you also have the issue of falling out with other tenants or them falling out and expecting you to take sides - believe me we've seen all sorts over the past few years whilst DD has been in the UK doing her first degree!