Getting really frustrated with DH being overweight

margaretclare

~Chameleon~ wrote: »

I'd like to think I'll be in your father's camp when I reach that age. This reminds me of a friend who is the same age as me (late forties) yet to hear her talk you'd think she was in her sixties, complaining of aches and pains and feeling old etc. Whereas I seem to have got physically and mentally stuck in my thirties somewhere along the line. Can't ever see me growing old gracefully :rotfl:

I'm afraid that DH, who isn't yet 80, drives everywhere. He's in pain all the time but never complains. We're also keen to embrace new developments, although we haven't yet got into 'smartphones'. DH acts as facilitator to a group at our local library getting to grips with basic computing. He says they can't get out of the habit of hitting the keys really hard, as in the old manual typewriters.

claire16c

mumps wrote: »

I've never seen it but I must look out for it, forgetting you had a pie inside a burger bun is hard to understand. Actually eating a pie in a burger bun is hard to understand or is that just me?

The show starts again next week presumably with this man

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/femail/article-2566668/Man-piled-pounds-thanks-balanced-diet-actually-loaded-calories.html

margaretclare

claire16c wrote: »

The show starts again next week presumably with this man

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/femail/article-2566668/Man-piled-pounds-thanks-balanced-diet-actually-loaded-calories.html

I grew up with pies of all kinds, could still make a pie if we wanted one. But burger buns were something I'd never heard of. Actually, if I made a pie, I'd regard it as an insult if someone felt it necessary to stick it inside a burger bun.

paulineb_2

I read that story, how can people think jam is ok because it's fruit? Well done to him for the weight loss.

In my part of the world putting certain foods on a roll or a sandwich is no big deal. I don't eat pies, but people will eat a roll and chips or a roll and fritter. I think on the east coast of Scotland a pie in a roll is quite common.

I don't think people would sit down to a meal and do it, more a way to use leftovers.

I've eaten a super noodle sandwich in the past, sandwich and crisps. Might sound disgusting but it's each to their own. Not done it for ages though, my diet these days is pretty healthy and I rarely eat white bread.

I do like a roll and fritter but again, not done it for ages, same with a roll and potato scone.

Georgiegirl256

adouglasmhor wrote: »

Sorry it’s taken me a while to type this.
I was diagnosed in 1992 with hepatitis C and took part in a year long trial of Interferon A/Roferon just over a year later, which failed to clear it. I kept on working and my GF moved in with me, I ate too much of the wrong stuff, drank more than I really should’ve and hardly exercised at all. I steadily gained weight, lost muscle I had built up as a squaddy, tug of war player, amateur boxer and a rugby player. I ended up being told on my annual check up my liver was becoming fatty and scarring had started (cirrhosis). So I took part in another trial this time combined chemical therapy - peginterferon and ribavarin, , I was the heaviest HepC patient they had ever treated so I got the biggest dose of interferon anyone had ever taken which really knocked the life out me. During this treatment my weight really ballooned (it tires you out – I used to sit like a zombie watching TV, fall asleep in work and really started comfort eating at this time too). I did not drink alcohol for that entire course of treatment but I ate like a horse at work, I was a real sugar junkie – possibly trying to gain energy from somewhere. I kept those habits after the course had finished which didn’t help as you can imagine.
At the end of that course I was told I was clear and I was obviously elated, phoning family etc.
Six weeks later at the follow up, I saw the research sister’s face and I knew something was wrong. The virus had re-appeared, it had not gone, just gone down to such a low level it had not shown on the tests. On the plus side, the cirrhosis had gone, the inflammation in my joints had faded, my liver was less fatty (this was in the days just before they could ultrasound your liver accurately so it was biopsies that checked this. Despite being upset about still having the virus I did feel much better than before the treatment, before it you could feel my liver below my last rib after it was less sensitive and had shrunk back to just about normal. I was well over 21 stone at this point though, sweated the whole time even in my sleep, had sleep apnoea, snored so badly my GF would sometimes get up and sleep in the living room and very low self worth.

As we were at GRI near the city centre GF took me for a coffee in Peckhams in Glasgow City Centre – which is a deli with a cafe in it and it had premises they let out upstairs. There was a poster for a martial art I had never heard of being taught in the Chi Yoga Centre upstairs and as I was feeling a bit better I wondered if I should try it as before I joined the army I had dabbled a little in Kung fu.

I said to my GF I was thinking about it and she was quite supportive. I walked up to the centre to see what it was like, had to rest half way up as it was three flights and took a leaflet.
The next day I started using the stairs in work whenever I could. As soon as I could do three flights without stopping I went in early so I could recover from the climb and joined the class.
The instructor had a word and I told him about my HepC, he said that was OK as they did not do full on sparring until very senior grades and even then it was not compulsory. First class I was exhausted after maybe 20 minutes, after a year I could finish the class (though I still sweated like a pig), my posture and gait had improved and I had discovered that my teacher was a qualified kinesiologist and did motivational and rehab stuff for sports people. He told me I had a problem with dairy products and I cut them out – sure enough my hay fever and sleep apnoea abated. I hurt my hip practicing a kick and went to the drop in physio at the local health centre. She gave me some exercises and told me my core was weak

I found a core stability class at a sports centre and started going, my GF joined as well (she was P’d off that she was having trouble getting a pair of size 14 jeans to fit), someone at the class said why don’t you try body balance, we did and soon tried Body Combat, Body Pump and eventually did a couple of boot Camp courses as well, I gained my Black Belt, I started taking an interest in what I ate and its effects on me. With weight loss started I fell doing a ladder run over tyres on bootcamp one day and bashed a rib, it seemed to never heal and flare up now and again for no reason and my abdomen would swell too. I ended up in hospital with jaundice and it was a gallstone – which can happen with weight loss and nothing to do with the rib at all. I had it removed; I was back at the gym being very careful in 3 weeks. I started kettlebell training with an ad hoc group of rugby players, wrestlers and martial artists – which is where the kettle bell picture is from. If you look closely you will see a figure heading towards the trees down the hill in the background, when he got back you took 20 seconds recovery and started on the next station. I started 5:2 and added metafit to the mix not long after and that’s about it so far.
I don’t think I will ever go back to my bad choices of before, though I can have real cheat days. GF is the same weight she was when she struggled to get into a size 14 but is now a size 8. I am probably fitter than when I left the army. I certainly have more energy. I have days when I over do it. I ate over 3,970 calories one day just before Christmas the year before last (I had the office Christmas lunch then our works night out on the same day), I told one of the gym instructors at a kettlercise class and she reckoned she had beaten me by at least 200 calories that day.

So you can see –nothing dramatic, baby steps all the way but I have seen improvements since just weeks after I started. I do things without thinking I would have not even attempted before. I have been hill walking with a full pack, sparred with senior grades from other martial arts, can hold a plank for over three minutes, got 10 on a bleep test last year, can get out a chair without grunting, don’t feel tired when I wake up, don’t sweat all the time and best of all can look in the mirror and not feel ashamed.

Thank you for posting all of that I think I'll show it to my husband, and it might hopefully point him in the right direction and give him some inspiration. Like you say, baby steps....and it's good to know that you can still have the odd days when you overindulge.

It's definitely inspired me to do more, as I could do with losing a few pounds myself!

pebbles88

:eek:That link to secret eaters..... Double cream on Special K !!:eek:

Jojo_the_Tightfisted

Georgiegirl256 wrote: »

Thank you for posting all of that I think I'll show it to my husband, and it might hopefully point him in the right direction and give him some inspiration. Like you say, baby steps....and it's good to know that you can still have the odd days when you overindulge.

It's definitely inspired me to do more, as I could do with losing a few pounds myself!

You've only just had conversation with him where he's said he doesn't like being told what to do.

How well do you really think another approach on the subject is going to go down, just a couple of days later?

paulineb_2

Jojo_the_Tightfisted wrote: »

You've only just had conversation with him where he's said he doesn't like being told what to do.

How well do you really think another approach on the subject is going to go down, just a couple of days later?

I thought the OP's husband said that, the person you quoted is another poster. I may have missed it if thats been said, given that the thread is now 11 pages long.

Georgiegirl256

Jojo_the_Tightfisted wrote: »

You've only just had conversation with him where he's said he doesn't like being told what to do.

How well do you really think another approach on the subject is going to go down, just a couple of days later?

Excuse me?! It wasn't me that said that, like Pauline has mentioned, that was the OP (I think?) who said that.

lindabelle66

This post made me really sad.

My ex husband and I were married almost 25 years and he had weight problems from the outset although as a Soldier it was kept under control with regular exercise. However after leaving the army he gradually got bigger and went from approx 15 stone to close to 19 stone (he is just under 6ft) and although i tried my best to help him eat healthily, and encourage him to swim, walk our dogs, ride his bike etc he progressively got bigger and bigger. I tried pointing out to him he was turning into his father ( a very very large man who i didnt fancy ), but my ex still continued to snack in secret - hiding sandwichwrappers, sweet paper etc in his car. He would also binge late at night after i had gone to bed.

He was in complete denial about his weight, and suffered from problem with his knees and back which in turn reduced his mobility even more, a viscious circle. I began to feel repulsed by his physical appearance, he had been a very nice looking man before becoming obese and even pointing this out didnt make any difference.

Sadly we seperated 4 years ago and subsequently got divorced, we had a lot of problems but this would be the one i would say was the biggest one for me. I just didnt fancy him anymore and couldnt bear any physical contact.