Getting really frustrated with DH being overweight

PenguinOfDeath

mumps wrote: »

Actually eating a pie in a burger bun is hard to understand or is that just me?

A Wigan Kebab

And no, I've never had one. I think I'd pass out before I finished it!

dandy-candy

Thanks for all the posts and messages, its really good to hear other people's experiences, and a big thanks to Douglas for sharing his pics!

All last evening DH was rubbing his leg and popping painkillers. When I got up this morning I just thought I would check with him that he had mentioned to the GP about his mums early death, and I was pretty shocked that he hadn't. I took him to our local walk in clinic and they gave us a letter and said to go straight to A&E for a scan to rule out DVT. He was rather quiet and sheepish about it all, and thankfully there isn't a clot there but the Dr did stress that a family history does put you at more risk. They also said that his left calf is possibly swollen because he stopped exercising to rest his leg, and that can make fluid collect. He said on the way home that he will start swimming again tonight
I'm hoping today might make him think more about his health.
I'm starting him on small portions and thankfully he does like salad so that will feature with his meals from now on! I'm quite pleased the Dr said to keep exercising as that gives me the green light to get him walking in the evenings.

Gloomendoom

An Aberdonian friend of mine claimed to have invented what he called the "P&O piewich" back in the early 80's.

Sadly he died of a heart attack a few years ago. He didn't make 50.

SmallL

Does your DH smoke?
If he does its a massive (the biggest) risk factor for developing DVT's. I work in a Vascular hospital ward so see plenty of bypasses and amputations due to smoking!

dandy-candy

SmallL wrote: »

Does your DH smoke?
If he does its a massive (the biggest) risk factor for developing DVT's. I work in a Vascular hospital ward so see plenty of bypasses and amputations due to smoking!

He did used to smoke 20 a day up until about 6 years ago. I don't know if the damage it does fades/disperses over time once you give up?

Pthree

paulineb wrote: »

Its possible to be very fit in certain sports but not others.

There was an article about this in the Daily Wail yesterday

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/health/article-2572480/Are-fit-think-You-walk-dog-eat-odd-exercise-class-You-surprise.html

As someone who has pretty much been over weight my whole life I can promise you that no amount of nagging, telling you your worried, feeding him smaller portion or being brutally honest and telling him he is fat is going to work. If he is anything like me it will just make him reach for a doughnut or 5.

Take out a massive insurance policy on him as others have suggested, tell him you are doing it and why, and then don't mention his weight again.

Start leaving holiday brochures around for that dream trip you always said you would do together, fancy a cruise? new kitchen? a convertible? how about a boob job or a little nip'n'tuck here and there? Anything you would like that you cant really afford.

When he asks how you are going to pay for it, tell him, that you will be spending that insurance money to get over your grief of losing him far too soon.

Not promising it will work though.

I had my moment about a 6 weeks ago, I watched this

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qX9FSZJu448 and something just twigged, I have lost 1 1/2 stone since then (plenty more to go) but this time I really do believe that this will be my last [STRIKE]diet [/STRIKE]lifestyle change. (finger crossed, god willing and all that!)

But, until he has "his moment" then I really don't think there is anything you can do

Good luck
P3

pukkamum

Salad is great for bulking a plate making it appear like loads, my favourite meal was always quiche, chips and beans, whilst slimming I would still have quiche and chips but I would replace the beans with salad and only have a quarter of the quiche as opposed to half, and a few chips as opposed to half a plate full.
Coupled with a huge salad it is a lovely meal and feels very satisfying as it hits all the 'bad food' pleasure spots without being massively fattening.
I also identified my main snacking times and instead of completely depriving myself I would have a chopped up mars bar that I had frozen, one slice would take ages to melt in the mouth and be very satisfying.

Person_one

dandy-candy wrote: »

He did used to smoke 20 a day up until about 6 years ago. I don't know if the damage it does fades/disperses over time once you give up?

20 minutes after the last cigarette
Blood pressure drops to normal.
Pulse rate drops to normal.
Hand and foot temperature rises to normal.

8 hours after the last cigarette
Blood carbon monoxide levels drop to normal.
Blood oxygen level increases to normal.

1 day after the last cigarette:
Chances of heart attack and stroke start decreasing.

2 days after the last cigarette:
Sense of taste and smell begin to heighten.
Certain nerve endings begin to re-grow.
Nicotine by-products are removed from the body.

3 days after the last cigarette
Bronchial tubes start to relax, making breathing easier.
Lung capacity begins to improve.

2 to 12 weeks after the last cigarette
Walking and aerobic exercises become easier.

1 month after the last cigarette
Circulation improves.
You experience more energy.

1 to 3 months after the last cigarette
Lung function increases up to 30 percent.
Bronchial cilia begin to re-grow, there is an increased ability to clean lungs, chances of infection are reduced, and pollutants are cleared.
Overall body energy increases.

1 to 12 months after the last cigarette
Coughing, sinus congestion, fatigue and shortness of breath decrease.

2 to 4 months after the last cigarette
The risk of developing Chronic Obstructive Pulmonary Disease reduces by 5%.

1 year after the last cigarette
The risk of developing Coronary Heart Disease reduces by 50%.

2 years after the last cigarette
The risk is reduced for recurrence of ulcers.
The ability for short-term healing is improved.
The risk of death from heart disease declines 24%.

3 years after the last cigarette
The risk of heart attack and stroke approaches that of someone who has never smoked.

5 years after the last cigarette
The risk of developing mouth, esophageal, throat and bladder cancer reduces by 50%.

5 to 15 years after the last cigarette
The risk of stroke reduces to that of someone who has never smoked.

10 years after the last cigarette
Pre-cancerous cells are replaced by healthy, normal cells.
There is a 50% to 70% reduction in the risk of developing lung cancer.
The risk of pancreatic cancer is reduced.

10 to 14 years after the last cigarette
The risk of developing Heart Disease drops to that of someone who never smoked.

15 years after your last cigarette
The risk of developing lung cancer is the same as non-smokers.
For Congestive Heart Disease, the risk reduces to the same as someone who has never smoked.
Life expectancy is as long as that of a non-smoker!

FBaby

As someone who has pretty much been over weight my whole life I can promise you that no amount of nagging, telling you your worried, feeding him smaller portion or being brutally honest and telling him he is fat is going to work. If he is anything like me it will just make him reach for a doughnut or 5.

Isn't telling her partner that she will be happy to spend his insurance money some sort of blackmail/nagging though?

I agree with you though that it does rarely work, but would like to know why? Is it purely do to denial, people not listening because they don't want to hear? Is it all a question of a failure with willpower? Or people just don't believe that it will affect them, that somehow, they will be spare from all those problems that have been proven directly related to obesity?

Nadstar

pukkamum wrote: »

Salad is great for bulking a plate making it appear like loads, my favourite meal was always quiche, chips and beans, whilst slimming I would still have quiche and chips but I would replace the beans with salad and only have a quarter of the quiche as opposed to half, and a few chips as opposed to half a plate full.
Coupled with a huge salad it is a lovely meal and feels very satisfying as it hits all the 'bad food' pleasure spots without being massively fattening.
I also identified my main snacking times and instead of completely depriving myself I would have a chopped up mars bar that I had frozen, one slice would take ages to melt in the mouth and be very satisfying.

This! I find that instead of worrying about not eating things, I have focused more on including 8+ portions of veg so fine, have a curry, but by the time you have tons of steamed spinach and mushrooms, you fit far less of the naughty stuff on your plate with the added boost of all the vitamins the meal would otherwise be wothout!