Getting really frustrated with DH being overweight

~Chameleon~

paulineb wrote: »

Its possible to be very fit in certain sports but not others. I could do a couple of spin classes back to back. Id struggle doing a couple of HIIT classes back to back.

Same here! I've even completed a couple of 12 hour spin-athons but can gain everything I need and knacker myself out doing 45-60mins of HIIT. In fact I often do a spin class as a warm up before going on to do circuits or strength training.

Georgiegirl256

jaylee3 wrote: »

and you think a 36" waist makes a man obese,.

Height to weight ratio.... Why is that so hard is that to understand? 36" might not be big for some, but is big for others, some people carry their weight better than other people.

SmallL

If my 5''6 boyfriend had a 36'' waist he would easily be obese, his waist is 28-30'' which is totally normal for his short stature!

paulineb_2

I think theres a point where you know within yourself what the point is where you feel as if you need to do something about your fitness/weight. Irrespective of what the BMI charts say. Ive had times in my life where I was just maintaining my weight because I was doing lots of exercise but my diet still needed a few tweaks, mainly portion sizes.

But when I got injured and still kept eating in the same way, I knew. I wasnt happy with my weight or fitness levels. I wasnt in denial. I just didnt do anything about it. And even before I looked at that video I knew when it was being filmed that I was going to look back at it and think, look at the state of me.

But it was seeing it that made me think, this can't go on. I had also had physio by that time so was able to resume classes I had to put on hold for months.

No one nagged me to lose weight. Not my mum or my brother. I didnt actually ask my brother for help until I was about 6 months in and wanted some advice re my diet and then we got talking and he did a gym programme for me.
I have the support. I also live on my own so I have no one trying to sabotage what Im doing.

Its been much easier than I thought it would be, but that was because I had reached a point in my life where I thought things have to change. I didnt approach getting fitter or losing weight or cleaning up my diet half heartedly.

If the OPs husband at the size he is, really put his mind to it, he could probably lose a stone in a few weeks. Men tend to lose weight faster and its getting that initial stone off and feeling better that will make him want to keep going.

I think as human beings we also put a lot of blocks in our own way and think, I cant do this, Im just meant to be this size, I couldnt give up wine, sweets, crisps, when actually you could or at least significantly cut them down if you wanted to.

If he doesn't want to join a gym, he could look at getting one to one sessions with a PT, or do an outdoor bootcamp. No matter what size you are, you can still do something.

My BMI was ridiculous this time last year. It didnt stop me doing HIIT type classes, I just modified exercises if I was struggling and it didnt take long for me to feel differences in my fitness, about 7 or 8 weeks in.

I hope the OP comes back to this thread. It cant be easy watching someone you love killing themselves with food.

lostinrates

SmallL wrote: »

If my 5''6 boyfriend had a 36'' waist he would easily be obese, his waist is 28-30'' which is totally normal for his short stature!

My five foot seven or eight DH has a 28 inch (ish..)) waist and is at the upper end of the healthy bmi range.

adouglasmhor

~Chameleon~ wrote: »

Nobody in the gym wears lycra any more :rotfl:

There's some in my socks from Decathlon.

More seriously I have been going to classes since I was well over 21 stone and no one has been anything other than encouraging. My choice to start out if very overweight was core stabilty type stuff to reduce the chance of injury as you move on. But I am not a trainer of any kind.

Me a couple of months ago. (15½ stone)

Me a couple of years ago. (19½ stone)


I will need to scan one in from when I was 21 stone +.

PS in the top one I am a 36 waist. I am 6'1".

Lily-Rose_3

Douglas you look GREAT! TBF, you look great on both pics, but obviously trimmer on the first one. The 36" waist does look just right on you.

My take on this:

I am 5 ft 5 and female and middle aged, and my weight has been between 8 and a half stone and 14 stone during the last 30 years, and I can honestly say that I am happier and healthier and fitter at around 10 and a half to 11 stone and a size 14, with a 28-29" waist than I was at 8 and a half stone and a size 8 and a 24" waist.

Yet the 'charts' say that I should be 8 and a half to 9 and a half stone ideally. At that weight, I don't look right, and suit being around ten and a half to eleven stone much better. Physically and mentally.

When I was very slim, I was forever worrying about my weight, and sometimes starving myself for a day or two if my weight was creeping up to 9 stone and I was forever measuring my waist, and always weighing myself. In addition, I never had any energy and was always tired.

At the 10 and a half to 11 stone mark, I am much happier, healthier and yes, sorry, but I am also fitter. Being fit doesn't necessarily mean being at the gym every day, and running 5 miles a day and having a 22 inch waist; it purely means that you live a healthy lifestyle, you eat healthily, and you have fairly regular exercise, this can be swimming, badminton, walking, cycling, or even just doing any physical activity, that isn't sports or gym related, eg; being active with your children.

I agree that there's no 'ideal' and although we 'have' become bigger as a nation, some people have also become somewhat obsessed with fitness and being as thin as possible. When I was a child, nobody went to the gym, nobody exercised and nobody ran 10 miles a day, yet nobody was fat (hardly.) Yet some people seem obsessed with fitness now.

I have no idea why so many people are so much bigger now. Maybe people are too dependant on ready meals which are full of crap and more people drive everywhere now, and rarely walk. On the other hand - as I said - you have the other end of the spectrum: people who just live and breathe fitness and judge anyone who doesn't live like them, and doesn't suit the parameters of the 'charts' as failures or obviously unfit, and unhealthy.

It's hard to find that perfect balance, and whilst some people are obviously killing themselves with their 25 stone plus frames, there are others who are a bit too obsessed with fitness. Either one is not healthy or good imo..

FBaby

My definition of 'fit' would be more linked to cardio-vascular performance ie how hard your heart needs to work and how quickly it goes down to normal rate after exertion.

~Chameleon~

FBaby wrote: »

My definition of 'fit' would be more linked to cardio-vascular performance ie how hard your heart needs to work and how quickly it goes down to normal rate after exertion.

I'm in my late forties and my resting HR is 49bpm. My max HR is about 175bpm although I frequently push it beyond to about 180/90bpm during high intensity bursts. My recovering HR is <100bpm at 2 mins post exercise and back to 50-60bpm within 5 minutes.

FBaby

~Chameleon~ wrote: »

I'm in my late forties and my resting HR is 49bpm. My max HR is about 175bpm although I frequently push it beyond to about 180/90bpm during high intensity bursts. My recovering HR is <100bpm at 2 mins post exercise and back to 50-60bpm within 5 minutes.

I think that would be considered very fit