What would be fair amount for a 21 year old to pay?

daisiegg

girlycara wrote: »

rubbish, of course they do. 31k is not a life of riley style salary with the cost of living today, and because he earns at a young age you as a parent would punish him? what rubbish

What cost of livings? You are advocating that he not be charged a cost of living!

GobbledyGook

I think this is one of the issues that will most likely depend on your experience when you started working.

I think if your parents could afford to keep you without any contribution then you're more likely to hope/want/plan to do the same for any children of your own.

Whereas if you grew up in a house where everything was a struggle (through no real fault of the adults before people start throwing 'well what if the parent gambles' etc at me) then you know the satisfaction and pride in the fact that your small contribution made a difference to both the home and your own thought processes so will be more likely to plan to expect children to contribute.

Similar in many ways to the 'should children have chores' debate.

Georgiegirl256

crosswo wrote: »

So food, cleaning products, toileteries, household wear and tear, his electricity usage etc costs nothing?

I said more or less the same. I'm assuming you would clean wether you had a child living at home with you or not? So I really don't think that's going to cost you any extra.

Food, in my own situation, I ate what my parents ate, and if I wanted something different then I paid for it myself.

Toiletries should be bought by the son, the parents shouldn't have to buy these anyhow.

He could make a contribution towards the electricity usage I suppose, although a TV for example uses very little power.

Mojisola

Georgiegirl256 wrote: »

I said more or less the same. I'm assuming you would clean wether you had a child living at home with you or not? So I really don't think that's going to cost you any extra.

Food, in my own situation, I ate what my parents ate, and if I wanted something different then I paid for it myself.

Toiletries should be bought by the son, the parents shouldn't have to buy these anyhow.

He could make a contribution towards the electricity usage I suppose, although a TV for example uses very little power.

So if you went and lived with a friend for a year, you wouldn't expect to pay anything other than a contribution towards the electricity? After all, you wouldn't be costing her much extra than when she lives on her own?

victory

Georgiegirl256 wrote: »

I said more or less the same. I'm assuming you would clean wether you had a child living at home with you or not? So I really don't think that's going to cost you any extra.

Food, in my own situation, I ate what my parents ate, and if I wanted something different then I paid for it myself.

Toiletries should be bought by the son, the parents shouldn't have to buy these anyhow.

He could make a contribution towards the electricity usage I suppose, although a TV for example uses very little power.

It's obviously more, not less, say you were a pensioner living alone, a pensioner would buy a small milk, whereas for a family of four say they would buy a huge milk, food times 4 is a lot more than if one lived alone, cleaning products cost more and are used more if there is a household of people messing up the house which needs cleaning, the electricity usage well I have eg all that in the last post 70

Sky_

girlycara wrote: »

I know nothing comes free, im not thick, I don't need a demonstration from my parents and nor do most other people

Did your parent's approach teach you to manage your money effectively? I.e. no debt other than mortgage and so on? You must be a financial wiz, if you're so convinced it's the right way, so well done you!

That aside, I'm truly saddened that any young adult, with a good income, would argue that it's right to want to leech off the adults who have already sacrificed so much to support you into adulthood. How selfish and horrible.

Personally, I freely gave my parents board money for my keep back in the 1980's, even though I earned very little at the time (I was only 16) and they didn't need it, because I saw it as only fair.

My own adult children would never refuse to contribute because they love, care for and respect us and would be horrified at the thought of us continuing to sacrifice our hard earned money to subsidise them once they're earning themselves!! I'm extremely proud that my children have grown into such caring, responsible and considerate young people.

DaveTheMus

You're son sounds like a selfish, spoilt brat........a 21 year old MAN bleating about 'my friends don't pay this much' like a 13 year old boy.

He needs to man up and help his family.

chrissyan

KxMx wrote: »

By all means he should be paying a fair amount and not expect to live rent free or not contribute in other ways to the household.

However I did just want to say it's not your son's fault that you have debt.

I'm not sure about your earning because in post #1 it's given as 34k combined then in post #35 you say your son's wage of 31k is more than double what you and partner earn together. Did you mean 14k combined?

Yes sorry KxMx, in post 35, sorry I made a mistake & it was too late edit. I think most people realised this.

No it is not my son's fault I have debt, unfortunately for a few years between the tax credits & child benefit ending and my son earning, I was living above my means, the weekly shop went on the plastic a few too many times. I fully realise I could have made some better choices along the road, hopefully my son will do better.:D

However, we are now straying well away from the original topic, I don't really feel that I should need to defend to myself on this thread, all I was asking for advice on was a fair board for my son to pay.

As for my debt, that is for another thread entirely and I am sure I can great advice on here for that.:)

thorsoak

girlycara wrote: »

I got a hand delivered letter today while I was at work from my local county court. it names an individual bailiff who delivered it.

I am in lots of debt and in truth this could be from any one of a number of debts, I suspect water or gas/electricity.

the letter said not to ignore it and I would risk being sent to prison for contempt of court if I did. it asks me to visit the court between 8 and 10 on Friday morning.

I have few assets certainly nothing more than a few hundred pounds at best, car on finance etc so no option to sell that.

my main worry now is not about the whys and wherefores of the debt or my finances, its the worry about what could happen next. whatever the debt I can agree monthly payments if they willle tme and stick to them.

I have never heard of this happening before, has anyone else? seems off that they are aksing me to go in to see them? I tried calling the 2 numbers I had for the county court and the bailiffs mobile but all went to answerphone.

Doesn't look as if Girlycarla's parents did her any favours when they allowed her to live off them when she was earning her own living ......

Mojisola

Sky_ wrote: »

Did your parent's approach teach you to manage your money effectively? I.e. no debt other than mortgage and so on? You must be a financial wiz, if you're so convinced it's the right way, so well done you!

Hardly! https://forums.moneysavingexpert.com/discussion/4906726

That aside, I'm truly saddened that any young adult, with a good income, would argue that it's right to want to leech off the adults who have already sacrificed so much to support you into adulthood. How selfish and horrible.

Personally, I freely gave my parents board money for my keep back in the 1980's, even though I earned very little at the time (I was only 16) and they didn't need it, because I saw it as only fair.

My own adult children would never refuse to contribute because they love, care for and respect us and would be horrified at the thought of us continuing to sacrifice our hard earned money to subsidise them once they're earning themselves!! I'm extremely proud that my children have grown into such caring, responsible and considerate young people.

Completely agree with your post.

An adult earning as much as chrissyan's son should be ashamed of living off people earning much less than he does.