What Were Your 20's Like ?

marisco_2

My 20s were amazing. I started those years at uni enjoying all that life had to offer. After gaining my degree I did teacher training. This is my profession still and I love and get a total buzz from it though I am in my 40s now. I was totally in love and eventually married the man I thought I would spend the rest of my life with. We travelled the world together and lived abroad for a while. When we came back to Blighty we bought our first home. A few months before my 30th birthday I gave birth to our first son. Don't think I could have crammed more in to those years if I had tried and when I look back on them I always smile.

balletshoes

Angelinaxoxo wrote: »

It's HARD being in your 20's now. EVERYWHERE it's doom and gloom.

The houses are soooooooo expensive (I live in London) so all my friends are already speaking about saving for mortgages.

ALL my friends are talking about how expensive houses are, money, work, etc.

Couple that with all my older family members telling me not to 'waste my twenties!!!'

At uni so many people were interning to make sure they got jobs.

There's just so much. Jobs are hard to get, you're scared you'll never own a house, it's just scary.

I'm carefree but it's literally ALL my friends talk about.

not everyone needs to own a house - if it had been my sole decision, we wouldn't own one (and have a mortgage on it) - I'd still be renting.

I do think work experience, wherever you can get it, is only a good thing (and always was, even 30 years ago).

bagpussbear

My 20's were very mixed. First couple of years was spent clubbing and having fun with mates. Then I met my husband, married at 22, got a mortgage, had my son at 26, and then was separated by 28 and left a single parent and hard up (divorced at 30).

I lost my dad at 26 and a couple of good friends passed away around the same time too.

I did everything a bit too quickly! so some things I enjoyed and other times were very hard for me indeed.

My advice to you, speaking in a motherly fashion :-) would be this:

Get a pension now, if you don't have one - and never depend on anyone financially.

Don't feel you should marry the first man you 'love' - love in itself does not always make a good life time partner.

Make wise and healthy decisions for yourself - remember they can come to bite you on the bum in later years!

Start good skincare, don't use sunbeds or be excessive (if at all) at sun bathing.

Spend more time with people you love - I would give the world to have another day with my dad (and my mum who passed too in my early 30's) - so value the time you spend with them.

I am in my early 40's now and actually this is the best decade for me, met my soul mate at 39. I would not swap these years for my 20's to be honest, although I would love to have my 21 year old body back haha!

You are in a lovely place right now, enjoy your life sweetie x

mgdavid

Buzzybee90 wrote: »

I'm the same age, my life consists of working 9-5, saving, paying bills and sleeping all weekend. The same for my friends.

I left clubbing behind after the first year of uni!

trouble with the yoof today - no stamina !!!
my 20s was in the 70s, was working shifts in an airline, plenty of parties & clubs, had the sports cars, cheap staff flights, never worried about next year or even next week. Good times...

Brighton_belle

Angelinaxoxo wrote: »

Okay that's good then. Just things about losing touch, people having families, no time etc. I'm guessing that's a myth then ?

Well I think the myth is the automatic assumption that you will lose them all. But yes, it is quite possible you won't have the same close friends in your 40's that you have now.
If you lose touch with people, that will be a choice. Some friendships are meant to be just for certain times of our lives - it doesn't demean the value they had. We grow and change with life so your priorities might change from the friend you have now, but you'll meet new people who you connect with.


It's impossible to have more than a certain number of really close friends, so in a way to have room for new friends something has to give.


Don't be afraid to be choosy who you become close friends with would be my advice.

Tiglath

bagpussbear wrote: »

You are in a lovely place right now, enjoy your life sweetie x

Yes, that's it - you have all that potential ahead of you. My stepdaughter moved in with us last summer just as she turned 19 and it was fascinating to observe her growing mentally and emotionally and make her own choices as she carved out a life for herself. Eventually she decided she didn't like living in London away from her friends and moved back to the coast recently, but she got a slice of a different life under her belt. At my age I'm like Janus - one face looking at the past, another looking to the future and realising that I don't know how much I have ahead. Not all doom and gloom, just realism. I'm fortunate in that I love my career and it pays well so at least I don't dread Mondays, but I do still struggle with a proper worklife balance as I've tended to be a workaholic for the past decade. My one resolution this year was to do more good things just for myself, so I'm limiting my working hours and getting fit.

marleyboy

Angelinaxoxo wrote: »

Evening All :beer:

I'm turning 22 soon and all I've been doing is trying my best to navigate life.

What does the future look like for me?

What did you think about your 20s and how were they ?

In my 20s, A Facebook friend was a penpal. There was no such word as LOL, With no mobile phones or internet, meeting up on a date meant writing a letter and posting it well in advance. You could only buy groceries with cash or cheque, directional routes involved using an A-Z. A Keyboard was something Howard Jones would play and a mouse is something the cat would chase. Windows was something you looked out of, Channel5 gave us 5 television channels and having digital meant wearing a watch.

HPoirot

Angelinaxoxo wrote: »

It's HARD being in your 20's now. EVERYWHERE it's doom and gloom.

The houses are soooooooo expensive (I live in London) so all my friends are already speaking about saving for mortgages.

ALL my friends are talking about how expensive houses are, money, work, etc.

Couple that with all my older family members telling me not to 'waste my twenties!!!'

At uni so many people were interning to make sure they got jobs.

There's just so much. Jobs are hard to get, you're scared you'll never own a house, it's just scary.

I'm carefree but it's literally ALL my friends talk about.

It's only as hard as you make it. You wouldn't be able to take up just any job offer if you were saddled down with a house and mortgage, you wouldn't be able to travel the world if you were saving for a house, and in your 20s it is all about experience. Remember, the world is your oyster, not just doom and gloom.

Angelinaxoxo

Tiglath wrote: »

Yes, that's it - you have all that potential ahead of you. My stepdaughter moved in with us last summer just as she turned 19 and it was fascinating to observe her growing mentally and emotionally and make her own choices as she carved out a life for herself. Eventually she decided she didn't like living in London away from her friends and moved back to the coast recently, but she got a slice of a different life under her belt. At my age I'm like Janus - one face looking at the past, another looking to the future and realising that I don't know how much I have ahead. Not all doom and gloom, just realism. I'm fortunate in that I love my career and it pays well so at least I don't dread Mondays, but I do still struggle with a proper worklife balance as I've tended to be a workaholic for the past decade. My one resolution this year was to do more good things just for myself, so I'm limiting my working hours and getting fit.

It's nice that you enjoy your career. Another huge thing with navigating this decade is the 'career' part I have an official career now, going back to work in March, but it's interesting facing the realisation that this is my first official career. Unlike my summer jobs and random jobs.

What tips will you give me for advancing my career? and navigating the work place. I hope to advance, get far etc. How did you manage to reach that point ?

angelil

I'm going to be 28 in a couple of months and feel this is an interesting question.
By the time I was 20 I was already disillusioned with my university degree; my first year was great but in my second and third years my results were slipping. I was starting to realise that I received inadequate guidance at school for most of what I was doing at university. Also, having been pretty much the best student in my year at school, it was a shock to go from that to being a small fish in a big pond. It didn't do wonders for my self-esteem But I guess lots of people go through that.

Aspects of life improved when I changed university for my master's, but then I felt horrible again when I graduated as the recession had just hit and even though I'd been applying for jobs for 3 or 4 months, I had no replies whatsoever, even though I was casting my net widely and was applying for more jobs in a day than the job centre wants you to apply for in a week

Things got better once I moved abroad (I was 22, nearly 23 at this point). As well as finally living with my partner I was also gainfully employed and therefore no longer felt like a useless waste of space. After one false start (first employers were nitwits ) I've now been with my current employer for more than five years, working as a teacher in an international school. It's been such an amazing learning curve - not just professionally but also in terms of my own personal growth, intellectually and in terms of confidence. Hopefully should qualify this year through an assessment-only route

I also got married when I was 25 and couldn't be happier. We'll have been married for 3 years at the end of this April.

All of this probably sounds boring to a lot of people here, particularly socially (many young French people my age have barely finished university and I have the impression that there are fewer facilities here for young people to meet each other). I just wish I had spent more time with my friends in the UK before leaving (which probably seems to contradict somewhat with my regret that I didn't work harder at university!).

Ironically, I actually see my social life improving once I have children as I will have the chance to get to mother/baby groups and other such things. I hope to have my first child when I'm 30 (plan to start trying next year when I'm 29), so foresee my 30s as being a lot less free. I've spent a lot of time travelling, enjoying my time with my husband and doing other things I enjoy (like reading and blogging ) in my 20s, so I think my 30s will be very different but that I will enjoy them also.

So my advice to anyone in their 20s? Even if at the beginning of your 20s you feel that things are not going well for you, it WILL get better by the end of your 20s. You will grow enormously, so just keep trying - and even if your life doesn't pan out the way you thought it would, chances are you will enjoy it anyway