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Christmas guilt :(
Comments
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I have been thinking about this a lot over the last couple of weeks - and as much as I love my kids and grandkids..........its about time they did their OWN Christmas dinners! I am beginning to feel like Wetherspoons - they turn up expecting Christmas dinner and I am 'working' all day! and to be perfectly honest - last year I was grinding my teeth! I felt like the 'kitchen help'.
Why don't you see about going to one of theirs for a change. The young ones should cook for us older ones I think lol. Out of my three kids one has dinner with his family another goes to his partners parents and my daughter grandson and her partner go to his parents. Suits me fine. We all seem to meet up at the eldest sons house to see the grandchildren open their presents around 10 and after an hour or so we all go our separate way. Suits us all:)0 -
Just to update you I went to have a look for flights today just in case I changed my mind... and even though I did find a couple of affordable ones (still would set me back around the £300 mark) I did speak to my bf tonight about me going away for Xmas and I have actually realised he would be alone on Xmas eve if I do..his family only celebrate on Xmas day. I feel bad and I don't want to leave him here by himself.
As you can see, Xmas time for me seems to be made out of constant 'feeling bad' feelings...London Fashion Week tickets, Clinique Facial treatment set (I see it as a win :P) Mario Power Tennis Wii game, Aura by Swaroski perfume, Theatre Tickets to 'A woman alone' :T, £1000 with Kerrang's Scream4Cash, Links of London Wedding Themed Bracelet, Chipmunk O2 launch party tickets, Adidas All In gig tickets, Water For Elephants Double Bill tix0 -
Just to update you I went to have a look for flights today just in case I changed my mind... and even though I did find a couple of affordable ones (still would set me back around the £300 mark) I did speak to my bf tonight about me going away for Xmas and I have actually realised he would be alone on Xmas eve if I do..his family only celebrate on Xmas day. I feel bad and I don't want to leave him here by himself.
As you can see, Xmas time for me seems to be made out of constant 'feeling bad' feelings...
you're the only one who is putting these guilt feelings onto yourself, your family understand, and you haven't even discussed it with your bf. So stop feeling guilty for something you perceive is a problem - because its not, to the people who matter - your nearest and dearest.
Please stop being so hard on yourself.0 -
A lot of people don't celebrate Christmas Eve, so I'm sure your BF will be ok for that day. If he's going to his family's house on Christmas Day, then I can't see what the problem is? Is he ok with everything? If so, you're the one who is putting the pressure on yourself.
Book that flight if you really want to go, don't think about it, just do it!0 -
OP go if you want to, and don't if you don't. Time to grow up and not worry about what everybody else thinks, who's not you and who is not living your life. There is genuinely not a script for life, everybody makes it up as they go along, so there's no 'wrong answers'.0
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Georgiegirl256 wrote: »A lot of people don't celebrate Christmas Eve, so I'm sure your BF will be ok for that day. If he's going to his family's house on Christmas Day, then I can't see what the problem is? Is he ok with everything? If so, you're the one who is putting the pressure on yourself.
Book that flight if you really want to go, don't think about it, just do it!
No I have spoken to my bf and he said he would rather I stayed with him for Christmas eve!London Fashion Week tickets, Clinique Facial treatment set (I see it as a win :P) Mario Power Tennis Wii game, Aura by Swaroski perfume, Theatre Tickets to 'A woman alone' :T, £1000 with Kerrang's Scream4Cash, Links of London Wedding Themed Bracelet, Chipmunk O2 launch party tickets, Adidas All In gig tickets, Water For Elephants Double Bill tix0 -
OP go if you want to, and don't if you don't. Time to grow up and not worry about what everybody else thinks, who's not you and who is not living your life. There is genuinely not a script for life, everybody makes it up as they go along, so there's no 'wrong answers'.
You are right. I still reason like a little child.
London Fashion Week tickets, Clinique Facial treatment set (I see it as a win :P) Mario Power Tennis Wii game, Aura by Swaroski perfume, Theatre Tickets to 'A woman alone' :T, £1000 with Kerrang's Scream4Cash, Links of London Wedding Themed Bracelet, Chipmunk O2 launch party tickets, Adidas All In gig tickets, Water For Elephants Double Bill tix0 -
As you can see, Xmas time for me seems to be made out of constant 'feeling bad' feelings...balletshoes wrote: »you're the only one who is putting these guilt feelings onto yourself, your family understand, and you haven't even discussed it with your bf.
So stop feeling guilty for something you perceive is a problem - because its not, to the people who matter - your nearest and dearest.
Agree with balletshoes - make your own decision because it suits you. You can see from the range of replies on lots of different issues on this board that there is no "normal" in any subject around family life!
Perhaps you should give yourself a Christmas present of a confidence building/self-esteem course or some sessions with a counsellor.0 -
Agree with balletshoes - make your own decision because it suits you. You can see from the range of replies on lots of different issues on this board that there is no "normal" in any subject around family life!
Perhaps you should give yourself a Christmas present of a confidence building/self-esteem course or some sessions with a counsellor.
Agree with this 100%0 -
Agree with this 100%
Like I mentioned earlier I am scheduled to start CBT in the new year.
I've just spoken to my sister and auntie and told them in no uncertain terms that I am hurt that my family doesn't make efforts to come visit me and that I expect them to in the future. At the very least if they don't, I don't want my mum to say ever again things like 'who told you to get a cat', especially as my kitten is the one who's rubbing herself on me and sitting on my lap purring now that she's heard I was upset. London Fashion Week tickets, Clinique Facial treatment set (I see it as a win :P) Mario Power Tennis Wii game, Aura by Swaroski perfume, Theatre Tickets to 'A woman alone' :T, £1000 with Kerrang's Scream4Cash, Links of London Wedding Themed Bracelet, Chipmunk O2 launch party tickets, Adidas All In gig tickets, Water For Elephants Double Bill tix0
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