What to do when punishments don't work?

natbags

This sounds so much like my son, he just wouldn't/couldn't behave at times and NOTHING would make him - there was no punishment strong enough, and he never learnt from them....long story short.... he was always quite loud and a few people started to comment on this, so we got in touch with the school nurse who referred him for a hearing test

The doctor testing his hearing commented that perhaps we should consider having him tested for ADHD??? (first we had even really heard of it) There are tests.... we did Connors (school also complete this) and using these together with other points taken into consideration, a conclusion was formed that he did show the signs

as a poster above poster mentioned 'behaviour related to one of the following;
Attention deficit (repeated requests/losing things/forgetting/v poor planning and organisation)YES all of these
Hyperactivity (chewing/restlessness/running around inappropriately) SOME OF THESE or
Impulsiveness (running across roads/significant lack of thought and/or empathy etc.) YES, ALL OF THESE and it is ADHD'

Medicating was something we strongly opposed initially however when we realised that a very, very bright boy wasn't achieving his potential at school because of something he couldn't control, then we changed our view (with parental training courses run by the ADHD nurses)
He is now a very happy, smart, bright boy, who got amazing results in SATS, and he feels much better on medication and not always being in trouble (because he just couldn't help it) - his Dr is very conservative on the medication dosage, so he isn't zombified (as many people report Re: Ritalin), he is just calmer and still full of personality and character (but more of the nice side :-))
GP's cant prescribe the medication, and medication is not (in our area anyway) given out willy nilly, and it is strictly controlled
Intervention has helped us hugely as a family and especially my son

ValHaller

Nicki wrote: »

Wildly speculated in fact.

Ritalin isn't even licensed for use in children by GPs so there is NO chance that would be the outcome of asking for advice. GPS can only issue repeat prescriptions for it if prescribed initially by a consultant and can't modify the dose without the consultants say so.

Being so dogmatic (and wrong) on this was far from helpful to OP whatever your intentions were.

I certainly have not been dogmatic - that is in your head only.

And in the context where this started, I think it was entirely right to encourage some thinking about where the action might lead

I'll say it again

=> ADHD => Ritalin

Is this really the way to go?

I stand by my question. It is right to be critical of any advice or proposed course of action. And certainly the unqualified "it maybe an idea to get him to your gp" which I was responding to is so unfocussed that you could end up just sucked into something and lose control.

While I accept that a GP could not prescribe ritalin, it is certainly a direction in which this course of action may lead. I don't think I was wrong to make the comment and I think that the reaction has been substantially OTT

Own_My_Own

ValHaller wrote: »

I certainly have not been dogmatic - that is in your head only.

And in the context where this started, I think it was entirely right to encourage some thinking about where the action might lead

I'll say it again

=> ADHD => Ritalin

Is this really the way to go?

I stand by my question. It is right to be critical of any advice or proposed course of action. And certainly the unqualified "it maybe an idea to get him to your gp" which I was responding to is so unfocussed that you could end up just sucked into something and lose control.

While I accept that a GP could not prescribe ritalin, it is certainly a direction in which this course of action may lead. I don't think I was wrong to make the comment and I think that the reaction has been substantially OTT

Some people just don't when when to stop do they.

southoftheriver

ValHaller wrote: »

Not that I have told anyone not to go. I have speculated on the likely outcome and suggested only going with a clear idea of what is required. As this is not a medical problem, it is no more medical advice than suggesting that someone does not go to their GP for a fault with their double glazing.

This is the bread and butter of community paediatrics. If the GP deemed this useful they could make a direct referral to them. You don't know the problem isn't medical and you don't seem to appreciate the scope of what is available either.

And OP you sound loving and supportive, not like a bad mum at all. Glad the school saw you so quickly and have some ideas of how to move forwards. Please keep us up to date with how things go.

ValHaller

Own_My_Own wrote: »

Some people just don't when when to stop do they.

You can't leave it alone.

adouglasmhor

ValHaller wrote: »

You can't leave it alone.

If you want the last word have it, it's Zyxt.

ValHaller

adouglasmhor wrote: »

If you want the last word have it, it's Zyxt.

Looks like the baying mob won't let me defend myself. Give that word to OwnmyOwn.

Own_My_Own

ValHaller wrote: »

Looks like the baying mob won't let me defend myself. Give that word to OwnmyOwn.

Thanks ! I'll happily have it.

ZYXT.