What to do when punishments don't work?

Nicki

ValHaller wrote: »

Not that I have told anyone not to go. I have speculated on the likely outcome and suggested only going with a clear idea of what is required. As this is not a medical problem, it is no more medical advice than suggesting that someone does not go to their GP for a fault with their double glazing.

Wildly speculated in fact.

Ritalin isn't even licensed for use in children by GPs so there is NO chance that would be the outcome of asking for advice. GPS can only issue repeat prescriptions for it if prescribed initially by a consultant and can't modify the dose without the consultants say so.

Being so dogmatic (and wrong) on this was far from helpful to OP whatever your intentions were.

meritaten

Nicki wrote: »

Wildly speculated in fact.

Ritalin isn't even licensed for use in children by GPs so there is NO chance that would be the outcome of asking for advice. GPS can only issue repeat prescriptions for it if prescribed initially by a consultant and can't modify the dose without the consultants say so.

Being so dogmatic (and wrong) on this was far from helpful to OP whatever your intentions were.

this is accurate information by Nicki - GPs cant diagnose and issue a prescription for Ritalin or its usual name Equasym. this HAS to be prescribed by a Psychiatrist - however, the GP can issue repeat prescriptions and is not allowed to modify or change them or stop them.

Why this prejudice against Ritalin? would you feel the same about antibiotics with a severe infection?
Ritalin has been used successfully since the late 1940s - That's SEVENTY years and very few contra-indications have been reported. in my own families case it has turned round one very unhappy boy into a happy confident boy. It has allowed a very troubled young girl to concentrate on her school work and become a much calmer and nicer person to be around - so the bullying has stopped and she now has 'friends'. and much more. would you deny them that?

It seems to me that those who deny this disorder and the treatment for it, are denying mental health issues because they, themselves, don't want to face up to them.

Mojisola

meritaten wrote: »

You don't have to have had a diagnosis to join the local Aspergers/ADHD parents group to get help with behavioural issues. My DD is very active in her group and she finds the support and advice invaluable.

This is worth pursuing. If you can learn techniques that work with your son, it doesn't matter whether he eventually gets any particular diagnosis - you'll have made progress with him in the meantime.

afaulkner66

Myself and my husband have been to a meeting this morning with the Head and my sons teacher, they have noticed the same behaviors at school. The Head has advised we go to the Dr and ask for a CAMHS referral, she suspects he is on the autistic spectrum. Appointment is booked for this afternoon so hopefully he will be able to get the support he needs. Thank you all for your replies. xx

adouglasmhor

Good luck - I bet he'll be making good progress soon thanks to your support.

meritaten

That Head is a treasure! honestly hun, the amount of parents who also have to battle the school astounds me - yours sounds extremely helpful and supportive.
I do hope you get all the help you all need - because the whole family require information, support and help in dealing with this.
My very best wishes for the future
Meri

afaulkner66

meritaten wrote: »

That Head is a treasure! honestly hun, the amount of parents who also have to battle the school astounds me - yours sounds extremely helpful and supportive.
I do hope you get all the help you all need - because the whole family require information, support and help in dealing with this.
My very best wishes for the future
Meri

She was brilliant, she asked a lot of questions and made notes to pass on to the schools psychologist, once he has been referred she wants to have a meeting to put steps in place but also involve DS in implementing structures to make him feel more secure with whats going on. Rather then going on about the negatives about his behavior she mentioned a lot of the good things he had done and his teacher also told me some of the things she would be trying with him.

After we got home I could have cried, the relief I felt, I know it makes me sound horrible, but I was relieved that it wasn't just me being a bad mum, that he would get some support and understanding. Before I started this thread in my mind I was doing something wrong, it never once crossed my mind that there could be anything medically wrong with him, I can't express enough how grateful I am to everyone for their input. xx

double_mummy

YAY so happy that you and son can now start making improvements in his life both at home and school and YAY for the brilliant head teacher

meritaten

afaulkner66 wrote: »

She was brilliant, she asked a lot of questions and made notes to pass on to the schools psychologist, once he has been referred she wants to have a meeting to put steps in place but also involve DS in implementing structures to make him feel more secure with whats going on. Rather then going on about the negatives about his behavior she mentioned a lot of the good things he had done and his teacher also told me some of the things she would be trying with him.

After we got home I could have cried, the relief I felt, I know it makes me sound horrible, but I was relieved that it wasn't just me being a bad mum, that he would get some support and understanding. Before I started this thread in my mind I was doing something wrong, it never once crossed my mind that there could be anything medically wrong with him, I can't express enough how grateful I am to everyone for their input. xx

Yes - my DD thought the same - and even had some 'so-called' professionals tell her so to her face. There are still some out there who think behavioural problems are down to 'bad parenting'. I am so relieved that you seem to have a marvellous school to back you up! my GS had to change schools as his previous school was absolutely diabolical and really made him worse. a supportive school who understand his problems and don't see HIM as the problem is essential.
Please think about joining some sort of group dealing with ASD while you are waiting for appts. you need to start the information gathering straight away as it can be a complicated process. and the support from parents who have been exactly where you are is priceless.

harrys_nan

Brilliant news, so pleased you are going to get the help you both need ans want.
I just thought you came over as a very caring mum, not once did I think bad parenting skills