What to do when punishments don't work?

adouglasmhor

ValHaller wrote: »

I have not ventured an opinion on this, so your question is moot.

Moot != arguable, debatable, unsolved or impossible to solve?

RAS

OP

How much eye contact does he make; with yourself and with your other children?

afaulkner66

RAS wrote: »

OP

How much eye contact does he make; with yourself and with your other children?

He will have some eye contact with you, but his eyes wander to look at everything around the room, I just put it down to him being too nosey, if he is in trouble he will glare at you.

afaulkner66

The school have phoned me back this afternoon and have asked if I can go in for a meeting tomorrow morning. I'm assuming they also have concerns as the meeting is with the Head as well, not just his teacher.

tom9980

afaulkner66 wrote: »

The school have phoned me back this afternoon and have asked if I can go in for a meeting tomorrow morning. I'm assuming they also have concerns as the meeting is with the Head as well, not just his teacher.

I wouldn't assume they have issues just because the head is going to be at the meeting, that is standard practice at my wife's school to stop a potentially irate parent from cornering staff members.

Pechow

ValHaller wrote: »

I have not ventured an opinion on this, so your question is moot.

ValHaller wrote: »

It is not matter of course for children in general. But in this case, the problem is not immediately obviously medical and taking the child to a GP will invite a medical response. Hence what I said.

Really this problem needs to be kicked about a bit more and only taken to the GP if there is a specific referral which seems to be necessary.

ValHaller wrote: »

I am for real. But if you are for calling an ambulance to deal with this child I'll defer to you.

Personally, I think that it is a waste of resources to bring the GP to this one - much like taking him to the optician, the dentist or the fire brigade - unless other resources indicate that there is a referral the GP can make.

You wrote opinions right there.

ValHaller

Pechow wrote: »

You wrote opinions right there.

Your highlighting is actually highlighting away from context.

The statement "the problem is not immediately obviously medical" is not a statement that the problem is not medical. The statement stands for itself.

And neither is "Personally, I think that it is a waste of resources to bring the GP to this one" a statement that the problem is not medical - particulalrly if you notice that it continues "unless other resources indicate that there is a referral the GP can make"

If you want to make out I said something, at least make out something that I did say ....

Errata

afaulkner66 wrote: »

At 7, I believe he should know that there are consequences to him actions and this is what we are struggling to get him to understand. When he does something to someone else we do sit down and explain to him what he's done wrong and will flip it round and ask if he would like it done to him and how he would feel if it was.

Explaining things to him are explanations, not consequences. He'll sit and listen to you all day long if his actions have no consequences.

afaulkner66

Errata wrote: »

Explaining things to him are explanations, not consequences. He'll sit and listen to you all day long if his actions have no consequences.

He does have consequences for his actions, but they do not bother him. The above was in relation to him understanding himself that there will be consequences before he does the things he does rather then acting without regard to anyone else.

meritaten

OP -almost every time you post you really make me think that there is something going on with your son which needs investigating by a Psychiatric Assessment.
and before anyone picks me up on it - I have a degree in Psychology based mainly on child behaviour, I have a son who is currently being assessed for adult ADHD, Two grandchildren with Aspergers, a grandchild with ADHD and a nephew with severe Autism. I am not an expert naturally, but, I am familiar with ASD (known As Autistic Spectrum Disorder, which covers all these conditions and many more.
There is a completely different style of parenting required for these kids! Medication can help (or not). But, to get the diagnosis requires persistence and know how!
You don't have to have had a diagnosis to join the local Aspergers/ADHD parents group to get help with behavioural issues. My DD is very active in her group and she finds the support and advice invaluable.
Please ignore those ignorant people who say not to bother your GP - he isn't just there for PHYSICAL illnesses but Mental Health issues too. and a sympathetic GP can be of great help!