Is OH being 'greedy'?

paulineb_2

Theyve been together 20 years, either something has radically changed or the OP has just put up with it till now

maman

paulineb wrote: »

Was absolutely never important for me as a kid to share family meals, perhaps part of that is because I grew up in a single parent household, not that I mean I didnt have a family, I did, but because we didnt really bother with formalities and still dont

I bet when my mum was growing up, things were different, because even in the gap between my gran having her kids and my mum having me and my brother, times changed quite dramatically.

I understand that some people crave peace and quiet at the end of a working day but it's interesting how many people want the 'company' of the TV, radio or music when they're eating alone.

I've found the insights in this thread quite fascinating. My priority is to eat with my DH whenever possible. I thought that was commonplace but apparently not.

If that means holding a meal until later then I'm happy to do so. When children were really young they ate early and we ate later together. When they got a bit older they had a snack after school and then ate at 7'ish with us.

Dunroamin

paulineb wrote: »

The thing is, theyve been together a long time, so whats changed recently?

Retirement? (Just a guess.)

paulineb_2

maman wrote: »

I understand that some people crave peace and quiet at the end of a working day but it's interesting how many people want the 'company' of the TV, radio or music when they're eating alone.

I've found the insights in this thread quite fascinating. My priority is to eat with my DH whenever possible. I thought that was commonplace but apparently not.

If that means holding a meal until later then I'm happy to do so. When children were really young they ate early and we ate later together. When they got a bit older they had a snack after school and then ate at 7'ish with us.

I dont do that either. I dont have a TV and I dont have the radio on or music when I eat

As I said earlier, all I can think of is that my mum had a very strict upbringing. My gran and grandpa were lovely people but my gran had a really strict upbringing, Id say verging on the harsh and I would bet that when my mum was growing up things were very much done in a certain order

Growing up with me and my mum (as my dad !!!!!!ed off when I was young and I was an only child till I was 10) would have been much more relaxed

My mum never bothered about us having to sit and face one another across the table when we were eating, was just her and me

I saw plenty of her and mealtimes were pretty relaxed, whether it would work for other people who knows, but never did me any harm at all, nor my brother.

My brother goes to see my mum once a week and he cooks or they get a takeaway, Im just not one to sit around a table and eat and havent ever been really

What works for you, works for you, some people like tradition and thats fine, my family never bothered with it and thats also fine

lostinrates

Nicki wrote: »

Isn't the issue here that both OP and her husband have large appetites and neither is good at judging how much the other will need to satiate them? It's certainly not the case, on what OP has posted, that her OH is eating all the food that has been prepared, just that he is not, in her opinion, leaving a large enough portion for her (and probably in his opinion he is eating just as much as he needs)





I have to say that as an average woman of average weight, a ladle full of curry accompanied by rice would be more than enough for me, and is roughly what I would serve up for myself and for my OH as a serving and neither of us would feel hard done by.

Depends on the ladle perhaps? We recently replaced ours and I was miffed at the proportions of the new one when I noticed the difference

coolcait

paulineb wrote: »

Theyve been together 20 years, either something has radically changed or the OP has just put up with it till now

I don't think that there have been any radical changes in the relationship. The first post on this thread is fairly typical of the way the OP writes about her husband on a regular basis.

I'm not sure why either of them have 'put up with it' for so long. The link earlier on in the thread offers one explanation.

A failure to communicate effectively is another explanation for some of the things that we've seen over the years.

zaksmum

Sometimes they just drive you mad though, don't they? You can put up with all kinds of annoying habits - just as they put up with ours, I suppose - then for no apparent reason something snaps and you feel like throttling them.

Men can be massively infuriating at times.

coolcait

zaksmum wrote: »

Sometimes they just drive you mad though, don't they? You can put up with all kinds of annoying habits - just as they put up with ours, I suppose - then for no apparent reason something snaps and you feel like throttling them.

Men can be massively infuriating at times.

:eek:



10 characters, MSE

Dunroamin

coolcait wrote: »

I don't think that there have been any radical changes in the relationship. The first post on this thread is fairly typical of the way the OP writes about her husband on a regular basis.

I'm not sure why either of them have 'put up with it' for so long. The link earlier on in the thread offers one explanation.

A failure to communicate effectively is another explanation for some of the things that we've seen over the years.

What link?.

paulineb_2

Dunroamin wrote: »

What link?.

I think there was a link, it now seems to have disappeared