Can you wear black to a wedding?

aliasojo

And breathe........

Now update time...company I ordered the clothes with have cancelled part of my order and didn't bother telling me. So not everything I expected is coming tomorrow.

Shoddy service, wont be using them again.

paulineb_2

I may get metaphorically battered around the head with a wet fish for suggesting this, but do you have anything already you could wear again and just jazz up with accessories.

I have bought new stuff for weddings and felt ok in it, but I always feel better wearing something Ive worn before and that I like. Its probably a confidence thing, if I know I have something in my wardrobe I do like I feel better about myself and Im not worrying incase something feels too new or I dont look right in it.

aliasojo

paulineb wrote: »

I may get metaphorically battered around the head with a wet fish for suggesting this, but do you have anything already you could wear again and just jazz up with accessories.

I have bought new stuff for weddings and felt ok in it, but I always feel better wearing something Ive worn before and that I like. Its probably a confidence thing, if I know I have something in my wardrobe I do like I feel better about myself and Im not worrying incase something feels too new or I dont look right in it.

Unfortunately not. I mentioned earlier about really only having casual clothes, I don't attend events that require 'finery' as a rule so I don't have things already in wardrobe.

coolcait

aliasojo wrote: »

I'm fat.

I can't wear light colours, a) they don't suit me because of skin tone/hair colour etc, b) they make me look even fatter.

I suit deep burgundy, navy, black etc.

I need to buy something to wear to a wedding in a couple of months. Even with the best will in the world, I'm not going to lose enough weight in that time to make that much of a difference.

All the 'occasion' stuff I've looked at online seems to be fitted or light coloured. But I've seen some black dresses that might do at a push.

Where do fat folk buy fancy clothes from? I live in jeans and t-shirts and haven't bought anything to go out in since 2007! I kid you not. :rotfl:

I suppose black trousers are out of the question?

What makes it worse is I know a lot of the other female guests are very well turned out on a normal day so within this particular circle, I'm probably going to stick out like a sore thumb at the wedding.

Oh well, there's always vodka, I'll just mingle with the barman. :rotfl:

So...black or not?

I've read the first page and the last page of this thread.

One of the most elegant women I've ever known was very amply proportioned.

It wasn't so much that she wore clothes which made her elegant or beautiful - what happened was that SHE made her clothes elegant.

At ease with herself, comfortable in her own skin as well as in her clothes, her best and brightest accessory was her personality. I know it sounds like an obituary. But it's not a bad one.

Those are the best fashion tips anyone has ever given me.

If you find a nice black dress that you feel good in, then dress it up with some colourful accessories and your personality at full lustre. Then go for it.

Dunroamin

aliasojo wrote: »

Unfortunately not. I mentioned earlier about really only having casual clothes, I don't attend events that require 'finery' as a rule so I don't have things already in wardrobe.

Well, what do you wear when you go out for the evening with your husband or have friends round?

I do wonder if you could think more laterally, particularly as most of the wedding parties I've seen, only the very close family are in any sort of "finery".

aliasojo

Dunroamin wrote: »

Well, what do you wear when you go out for the evening with your husband or have friends round?

I do wonder if you could think more laterally, particularly as most of the wedding parties I've seen, only the very close family are in any sort of "finery".

Out for the evening with my husband? :rotfl: You've been here long enough to have read enough of my posts to know fine we have no life and money has been tight.

We don't go 'out' and we don't have friends round.

Did you think I was kidding when I said I had a wardrobe to suit my life?

We've been to the pictures 3 times in the last 2 and a half years. Outfit: Jeans and a t-shirt.

We've had SIL & BIL here for a bbq in the garden. Outfit: Jeans and a t-shirt.

Dunroamin

aliasojo wrote: »

Out for the evening with my husband? :rotfl: You've been here long enough to have read enough of my posts to know fine we have no life and money has been tight.

We don't go 'out' and we don't have friends round.

Did you think I was kidding when I said I had a wardrobe to suit my life?

We've been to the pictures 3 times in the last 2 and a half years. Outfit: Jeans and a t-shirt.

We've had SIL & BIL here for a bbq in the garden. Outfit: Jeans and a t-shirt.

I know that money's been tight but I didn't know that you never went out at all and I can't really be expected to know that you never have friends round (or go to theirs) as that's what most people do when they don't have enough money to go out!

What about when/if you have to go into one of your children's schools for a parents' evening or to sort something out? Don't you have a smart (or at least tidy) pair of trousers that you could dress up with a new top, jewellery and shoes, making them suitable for a wedding? You haven't implied that you're anything other than an ordinary guest but, if you're the bride's sister (or similar) and you really do have to pull all the stops out then obviously it'll be different.


I do sympathise, being only 10 years older than you, not far off your size and living a similar lifestyle but most of the clothes that have been suggested here (lovely as many of them are) seem to me to be terribly expensive and verging on the overdressed for a normal guest at a wedding. Given what you've said about your finances and lifestyle, why think of forking out that much for something you can't afford and will never wear again?

My comments are intended to be positive but there are other ways of trying to be helpful which don't involve saying "this is a lovely dress that costs £80 even if you'll only ever wear it once".

FBaby

aliasojo wrote: »

No, I'm afraid it didn't help. In fact if anything, you've put my back up. I didn't actually ask for advice on how I should feel, thanks.

And btw I don't look terrible in everything, I suit casual clothes, certain colours and certain styles. Wedding attire tends by nature to be much more formal, not my usual style and not what particularly suits my shape.

Then I would agree that you do have an issue, because my first thought when I read the post was what a brilliant one it was. Was going to quote it and say so until I read your response.

I'm getting married next month and Gosh do I hope no-one is wasting that much energy wondering what they should wear. I couldn't care less what they look like, what I want is them to be happy to be there, enjoying themselves in whatever comfortable clothes they want to wear.

Battleaxe44

I wish I lived near you, as I have a wardrobe of clothes that might suit and you would be welcome to to anything you liked if it fitted, I have a sewing machine and would love to make you something you would enjoy wearing.

I read your post about your order not being delivered, that is poor service.

I am going to a Dinner Dance in October and had to find something suitable to wear, especially as I don't any of the people attending this function.

Isn't it wonderful when people tell you, you have to embrace something and love yourself..arggghhhhhh...

You love black for whatever reason, I would go for something that fits the dress code on the invitation, if they haven't stipulated a dress code, I would speak to the Bride's mother and ask her if something long, or trousers are suitable. I have to admit I haven't read all of the pages of this thread, So many opinions and tastes, but this about you and what you are comfortable with.

Go long, floaty and black if this is what you are most comfortable with, dress it up with accessories and even put flowers in your hair.. Let it all hang out and enjoy the day...

aliasojo

My comments are intended to be positive but there are other ways of trying to be helpful which don't involve saying "this is a lovely dress that costs £80 even if you'll only ever wear it once".[/QUOTE]

I absolutely agree with your comment about cost. I wavered at one point and actually considered shelling out loads on a lovely dress which did fit, in John Lewis but thankfully my common sense kicked in. I would never wear it again and it would be foolish of me to spend too much money.

I do think your comments are trying to help btw, I just kinda felt you simply didn't believe anyone could have such a sparse wardrobe. Believe it, it's true.