The Mad, Bad Menopause Thread

tattycath

Torry_Quine wrote: »

Here it is.

http://www.theguardian.com/books/2014/apr/11/jeanette-winterson-can-you-stop-the-menopause

Wow! Interesting reading-definitely food for thought,
Thanks for this.

tattycath

Ok, so I've been to docs and he said my iron is on the low side and my thyroid is fine and my hormones are fine. So according the the tests I haven't started the menopause at all.
He is making an appointment for me to have a scan ASAP. :eek:

Morglin

HRT got me through mine - best thing since sliced bread!

I was on it for years, due to an early menopause, because of a hysterectomy, and would still be on it now, were it not for the doctors insisting I had been on it long enough lol

Lin

PeacefulWaters

How do I help Mrs PW?

How do I avoid taking the occasional personal attacks, well, personally?

How do I stop Mrs PW seeing ordinary conversations being an argument / battle that she simply to win?

While I can understand that things are different for her, how on earth can I understand what's different beyond "it just is"?



(I could have sworn I made this post a new thread ... Oh well)

JodyBPM

I'm only 41, and am beginning to suspect I might be menopausal.

I've not had any periods for about 3 years, but I have the Minerva coil in. I had spotting for the first couple of years, but then nothing. I'm due to have it removed/replaced in Nov, so will speak to my doc then. My skin is dry and itchy, I'm starting to grow a beard, I simply can't lose weight and I've had one or two hot flushes. I'm also struggling a lot emotionally, feeling a bit indecisive and bewildered at times and feeling tearful and overwhelmed a lot. I've also noticed my lovely husband and children walking on eggshells around me a bit, so I think my fuse is shorter than normal. It's hard to know if that might be the menopause, or whether its just because I have a lot on my plate between working part time, young children, elderly and increasingly needing help parents and a husband who works long hours in London.

My mum had her menopause done and dusted by 45, so its not out there that I could be starting, I guess.

How do you differentiate the symptoms of menopause from just reacting to a stressful period of life?

I guess a talk with the doc is in order, but I suspect they will dismiss the idea because I'm only just turned 41. I'd say these symptoms started at around 40ish when I was going through a tough time with a family bereavement, but I don't seem to have been able to bounce back in the way I would have expected.

System

I guess a talk with the doc is in order, but I suspect they will dismiss the idea because I'm only just turned 41. I'd say these symptoms started at around 40ish when I was going through a tough time with a family bereavement, but I don't seem to have been able to bounce back in the way I would have expected.

Well the only concrete evidence I relied on was a blood test. My periods had always been regular so when I started dropping the odd one or two I knew there was something going on.

patchwork_cat

PeacefulWaters wrote: »

How do I help Mrs PW?

How do I avoid taking the occasional personal attacks, well, personally?

How do I stop Mrs PW seeing ordinary conversations being an argument / battle that she simply to win?

While I can understand that things are different for her, how on earth can I understand what's different beyond "it just is"?



(I could have sworn I made this post a new thread ... Oh well)

Talk to her, not us.

vandanfc

Check out the Menopause matters website and forum, there is a lot of useful info available there:

http://www.menopausematters.co.uk/

Be prepared to help your loved one cope with the menopause with the Menopause Matters A,B,C,D,E for Men.
Accept that changes will take place out with her control, it's not her fault
Be informed, read the information on this website and be assured that it is accurate
Consider her needs, emotionally and physically and show her that you Care
Don't necessarily offer solutions, we need time to work out the answers ourselves and Don't assume that you have done something wrong. Do talk about it and Don't go into your cave
Every women is affected differently, what worked for someone else may not be the answer and we need time to find what works best for ourselves - be patient

PeacefulWaters wrote: »

How do I help Mrs PW?

How do I avoid taking the occasional personal attacks, well, personally?

How do I stop Mrs PW seeing ordinary conversations being an argument / battle that she simply to win?

While I can understand that things are different for her, how on earth can I understand what's different beyond "it just is"?



(I could have sworn I made this post a new thread ... Oh well)

victory

patchwork_cat wrote: »

Talk to her, not us.

He is struggling to know how to that is why he is asking here on a forum;)

PeacefulWaters

vandanfc wrote: »

Check out the Menopause matters website and forum, there is a lot of useful info available there:

http://www.menopausematters.co.uk/

Be prepared to help your loved one cope with the menopause with the Menopause Matters A,B,C,D,E for Men.
Accept that changes will take place out with her control, it's not her fault
Be informed, read the information on this website and be assured that it is accurate
Consider her needs, emotionally and physically and show her that you Care
Don't necessarily offer solutions, we need time to work out the answers ourselves and Don't assume that you have done something wrong. Do talk about it and Don't go into your cave
Every women is affected differently, what worked for someone else may not be the answer and we need time to find what works best for ourselves - be patient

Thanks. And for the PM stuff.

patchwork_cat wrote: »

Talk to her, not us.

Well I suppose that states the obvious.

When I've asked how I can best be supportive I've been sidelined. She can't help, it is what it is and I just have to live with it because she does.

Well I sort of get that. I get that it's one of those things you sign up for during a long term relationship.

It's not just about me talking is it? I'd like to do some listening to. I'm not really getting the chance.