Those who are waiting to TTC (New Thread)

ilovelondontown

Following from the old thread here (https://forums.moneysavingexpert.com/discussion/3213038) which goes on for over 150 pages (!) I thought I might strike up a fresh thread in the hope that it might be more appealing than sticking a post at the end of 150 pages....

So here goes!

Please feel free to post your stats, I'll go first to get the ball rolling:

My TTC Stats:

My Age/Partners age: 29/32
Time together: 5 years (married 8 months)
What are you waiting for?!: A bit of time together as a married couple, sorting out finances
When will you be TTC? December 2013 onwards
Any preTTC prep? Yes, temp charting, checking "fluids" / cervix, will soon start taking folic acid. I'm not on any birth control, I chart to avoid pregnancy.
I'm taking my mind off TTC by... booking a holiday, getting a lot of date nights in and enjoying my glass of wine with friends.

ilovelondontown

Miss_Bolan wrote: »

HI everyone

I was a regular poster on this forum 6-8 months ago, but I have been absent for some time. Lots of reasons really, trying not to concentrate on 'waiting to ttc' being a main one!

I have gone through the crazy baby manic period and come back out the other side, I had decided to be sensible and wait and my plan WAS to start TTC in April/June 2014.

However yesterday we received some very tragic news in the family and a sudden an untimely death has caused me to really think about things

A young man, on his way home from work, had an accident and never made it home. He never made it to hospital. He leaves behind his young son and his young partner who is pregnant with their second child.

If you'd have written down his life then none of it would have been 'sensible' or 'thought through' and yet somehow they had made it. Him and his partner and young family were living and growing and loving and somehow they all made it together. And now he is gone.

The only reason I am not 'ttc' is finances. And whilst that is the sensible and correct thing to do, maybe sometimes 'sensible' isn't the only thing to be?!?

I don't know, I am aware the situation has altered my perception and reasonable decisions, but life can change on a sixpence, and if it should happen to me or my partner how would I feel?

I don't know. It's the 'what-ifs' which are haunting me today...

Sorry, I don't want to bring anyone down or make the thread morbid, things like this just make you re-evaluate the priorities.

Miss Bolan, didn't want to lose your post in the new thread so have tagged it here, I hope that is ok?

I think it's perfectly normal for a death of someone close to you to make you question if you're making the right decision to wait (I've been in that situation myself twice since I've been waiting), but I think it can sometimes be a knee jerk reaction to your own mortality- if we reacted to every tragic story we wouldn't leave our homes for fear of what if!... that said, some people do find clarity in ttc from circumstances like this but it's probably good to remember why you are waiting in the first place too.

ThinkPink

Oh fab idea

My TTC Stats:

My Age: 30
Time together: 12 years (married last year)
What are you waiting for?!: A bit of time together as a married couple, Making sure my job is ok
When will you be TTC? December 2013 onwards (NTNP from Sept time, but Ill stay on here until Dec when we start properly if thats ok)
Any preTTC prep? None yet- I have folic acid in the kitchen drawer if that counts!!:rotfl:
I'm taking my mind off TTC by... Im not really!!:rotfl:

laurabllue

Ooh, good idea!

Age: 28
Time together: 9 and a half years, married 3 and a half months (he took his time!)
What are you waiting for?!: Not entirely sure...we have a holiday in September I'd rather not be pregnant for and I didn't want the pressure of TTC straight after the wedding.
When will you be TTC? Very soon I hope!
Any TTC prep? I came off the pill at the end of April but still waiting for a period to arrive. I've got folic acid but think I've only managed to take it twice! I guess we're NTNP at the moment although I have it in my head that that's not really what we're doing as I haven't had a period in three months!
I'm taking my mind off TTC by...like ThinkPink I'm not really! One of my best friends is pregnant and due in September. We always used to speak about being on maternity leave together but that won't happen now! It's on my mind quite a bit at the moment so I'm worried what it'll be like when we're properly trying!

Jonesy88

Oooo can i join??

My TTC Stats:

My Age/Partners age: 25/28
Time together: 7 years (married 18 months)
What are you waiting for?!: Financial Stability - to be able to buy the things we want and take the maternity time off I need
When will you be TTC? Late 2014
Any preTTC prep? Nope, but i don't take the pill or have contraceptive injections.
I'm taking my mind off TTC by... Debt busting and enjoying unplanned/spontaneous outings.

I am SO broody though - atleast a dozen women around me are pregnant aswell. I'm glad for them but 14 months seems so far away...

ThinkPink

Im a bit sad but I work in payroll and have already done quick calculations about what my pay would be for the different options we get to take maternity pay!! We will be ok for 6 months on maternity pay (luckily my husband earns more than me!!) we would just need to work out if we could afford for me to have another 3 months on just smp!! Hopefully we can do some serious saving between now and then so I can!!

Has anyone else started to think about this or what they will do about childcare etc? (I need to think about this as I would have to work part time)

laurabllue

Obviously at the moment it's all very theoretical but I don't think I could go back to work. We live in Essex and both commute into London. I wouldn't want to work full time because of our hours, even without staying late we're both out of the house for at least 12 hours a day, and part time would leave us with barely any extra after accounting for child are & travel. My job isn't really one where I'd lose out by taking a few years off so ideally I'd try and get something part-time locally. It'd mean a big salary cut but I'd prefer to have time with any children we're lucky to have and my OH is more than happy with that (he was bought up pretty much by a nanny whereas my mum didn't work till I was about 7 so we've seen both sides).

sulphate

My Age/Partners age: 25/28
Time together: 4 years (married 4 months)
What are you waiting for?!: Buying a house (moving next week!), husband to finish uni (next year)
When will you be TTC? We initially agreed September but I'm wondering if we should have some more time in our new house first
Any preTTC prep? Stopped the pill a month ago, taking folic acid
I'm taking my mind off TTC by... Moving house

As for childcare plans, imo thinking it to death will just make you think you can never afford to have a baby, but my mum has already offered to help (she lives close) so hopefully I will be able to go back to work part time and not worry about extortionate costs.

ilovelondontown

Ah how lovely to see a number of posters already, that's a pick up from waiting days to see a response to the older thread. Brill! All are welcome so even if you're a wttc lurker and are tempted to post :think:, sign up, join in!

Once we have a collective group I'll put all the details of the ttc's in a list a the top so new joiners can get a quick who's who.

As for the maternity pay thing, I've definitely checked this out several times! It's part of the reason we're waiting, I've got a loan and a credit card I'd like to clear before kids come along- I'm trying to minimise my monthly outgoing now so I can get used to basically having no money and being able to stay on mat leave for as long as possible. In an ideal world I'd be a sahm, but for the foreseeable future that won't be possible, maybe one day....but I guess I'll need some kids before I do that in any case! haha!

wangdoodle

Hi! I posted a bit on the old thread. Not updated in a while cause, well, nothing's changed. Thought I'd add my stats tho:

My Age/Partners age: 34/28
Time together: 2 years
What are you waiting for?!: We want to buy a house. I'm also hoping that we'll get married before having children.
When will you be TTC? December 2013 onwards
Any preTTC prep? Not really but I guess I should probably get on with it!
I'm taking my mind off TTC by... I'm trying to take my mind off it with baking and eating and running but it's not really working!!

WD x

daisiegg

Aww, I liked the original thread, but never mind, this one looks good too