FINALLY DONE IT: Tayforth's new beginning

tayforth

jenhug wrote: »

Its good to have a little cry, it is so cleansing, and means you are nearer to healing.

You're right, I suppose. I hadn't cried in days, so it was a bit of a shock xx

summerof0763 wrote: »

don't be daft, just didn't want you being bogged down with junk mail.
glad you got more time off work, take care to relax a bit, once you have told your mum you will be able to start recovering x

Thank you, and I will heed your advice xxx

marisco wrote: »

I am really pleased that the gp you saw showed such empathy to your situation and signed you off for another couple of weeks. There is no point in rushing back to work. Take all the time you need to speak with your family and friends and to start healing from all you have been through and coped with.

I cannot believe how far you have come in just over a month. You are doing so well. There will be many ups and downs but I think in a years time you will look back and be amazed at how your life has changed and drastically improved. That is what I hope for you

Thanks marisco. She was really nice.

I can't believe it either. It's felt like a year, not a month! And I definitely believe that life will get better. I know that I've done the right thing, and I will hold onto that thought no matter what xx

paulineb_2

tayforth wrote: »

The doctor was lovely, and gave me another 2 weeks off. She also asked to have a blood test tomorrow, she wants to rule out glandular fever (!).

I had another good cry, was just letting out all the stress of the wedding and keeping it from my family. I just want to tell my mum ASAP. I'm going to see her tomorrow evening and will tell her then.




Oh my goodness (((hugs))). You went through such a lot in a short period of time, and only 6 weeks off sick xxx

Once the tests are done, Id say see how you feel about getting back to work, maybe not right away, but in a certain time frame.

I spent far too long off sick in certain jobs because of stress and I couldnt go back and in some of the jobs, I left, went elsewhere, changed career, you name it, Ive done it.

But, if you have a supportive employer and you get to the point where you feel less stressed, perhaps if you trust a manager at work, maybe think about letting them know some of the stress youve been carrying. A good manager will want to support you and also support a return to work, even if its phased.

Theres absolutely nothing wrong with a cry. Im not prone to crying a lot but when I do, it tends to be in situations where I have been stressed and Ive shed more than a few tears in my time in my Gps surgery (my Gps arent supportive which makes life tougher at times).

2012 was a really testing time for me and mine as Ive said before, family stuff and work stuff, I think I cried more last year than Ive ever cried in my life, along with two of my mums cats dying, sometimes you need to get your emotions out before you end up more unwell.

I actually hate crying in front of people (I blame that on being Scottish and reserved), but if you need a good blub then so be it. You arent superwoman and you dont need to be.

If a GP really thinks you are suffering from stress and anxiety, they wont withhold a sick line. Thats about the only thing my GP ever did for me, gave me sick lines (notes), but its in their best interests to actually listen to people when they are suffering and not force them back to work.

You may not feel like you would be any use at work just now and maybe you wouldnt, but in a few weeks, even if your return is phased and you go back part time, it might actually help you get into a routine.

tayforth

paulineb wrote: »

Once the tests are done, Id say see how you feel about getting back to work, maybe not right away, but in a certain time frame.

I spent far too long off sick in certain jobs because of stress and I couldnt go back and in some of the jobs, I left, went elsewhere, changed career, you name it, Ive done it.

But, if you have a supportive employer and you get to the point where you feel less stressed, perhaps if you trust a manager at work, maybe think about letting them know some of the stress youve been carrying. A good manager will want to support you and also support a return to work, even if its phased.

Theres absolutely nothing wrong with a cry. Im not prone to crying a lot but when I do, it tends to be in situations where I have been stressed and Ive shed more than a few tears in my time in my Gps surgery (my Gps arent supportive which makes life tougher at times).

2012 was a really testing time for me and mine as Ive said before, family stuff and work stuff, I think I cried more last year than Ive ever cried in my life, along with two of my mums cats dying, sometimes you need to get your emotions out before you end up more unwell.

I actually hate crying in front of people (I blame that on being Scottish and reserved), but if you need a good blub then so be it. You arent superwoman and you dont need to be.

If a GP really thinks you are suffering from stress and anxiety, they wont withhold a sick line. Thats about the only thing my GP ever did for me, gave me sick lines (notes), but its in their best interests to actually listen to people when they are suffering and not force them back to work.

You may not feel like you would be any use at work just now and maybe you wouldnt, but in a few weeks, even if your return is phased and you go back part time, it might actually help you get into a routine.

Thank you Pauline. I do feel that I couldn't concentrate at work ATM. I cried from the minute I sat down in the doctor's surgery and continued crying for 25 minutes, and would be likely to do the same at work. I really don't want to go back until I can deal with it - no point in being there if I'm not making any meaningful contribution.

But hopefully I'll go back soon.

lostinrates

Hey, we have matching glasses now! Another fan of the pink birds.....

No fizz for me sadly, but I am sipping water from my bedside flamingo glass! No lentils either, but we did have a nice lentil salad last weekend. (As a matter of interest can you heat the ready flavoured ones on the hob or are they microwave only?).

tayforth

lostinrates wrote: »

Hey, we have matching glasses now! Another fan of the pink birds.....

No fizz for me sadly, but I am sipping water from my bedside flamingo glass! No lentils either, but we did have a nice lentil salad last weekend. (As a matter of interest can you heat the ready flavoured ones on the hob or are they microwave only?).

No fizz for me either, my friend cancelled (family emergency). So I'll save it for when I see her again

I'm about to have a nice 3 bean, puy lentil and roast pepper salad, mmm. I think that you can heat them on the hob, btw.

The flamingo glasses are just SO pretty, they are making me smile

tayforth

I'm catching up on last night's Apprentice. I still find it hard to just sit and do nothing, but it's nice tbh

My lovely new lamp is on and giving a beautiful warm glow. I have my flamingo glass beside me (only water in it, mind!) and I'm so relaxed.

tayforth

So tomorrow is the day that I finally tell my mother. I don't think that I'll sleep a wink. No idea how she'll take it. For me, it'll be such a massive relief to tell her at last.

nerak_y

Hiya Tayforth!
So pleased to hear you had a fab time at the wedding. I've not had time to read through the last 5 pages as yet but it crossed my mind that perhaps your family will not be too surprised about the break for freedom. If they are then you have given them the perfect evidenceat the wedding weekend that you are far happier without ex! Big hugs!!
xx

jenhug

Good luck Tay, I will be thinking of you. Once your mum knows, the healing will really start. x

nerak_y

Keen_Young_Learner wrote: »

Tayforth, I've been a secret stalker since day one, gripped to your story! Everyone has said this already but you really do sound so lovely and likeable.

I hope that you're taking all the positivity that's coming to you from this thread and are just soaking it up! Sorry I've not commented before (it's a right faff, very rarely get a decent internet connection up), but now I've had the chance I just had to say something...

A massive well done for everything you've been through and achieved in only a month! You have done really well and maintained a level head and rational outlook throughout. I reckon I could only dream of being as together as you have been about this, if I were in your shoes.

One of my favourite lyrics at the moment is from "Same Jeans" by The View (such a one hit wonder from yeaaars ago I know..!), it goes "You'd be amazed at what you can achieve in a year". It gives me goosebumps when I hear it... Without going into too much detail here, I'm quite literally thousands of miles away from where I was this time last year, on the other side of the world! I'm such a different person and I've learnt and grown so much, I'm so proud to be me .

You won't believe the exciting and incredible opportunities that life can throw at you, and now that you're able to be the positive, happy, confident person that you always secretly were, those opportunities will be coming along thick and fast! You will have the courage to take them, I'm sure, whatever they are. Well done again, and enjoy your new life as much as you can. There'll be tough days of course, but look to the future, it's sunny and golden

Lots of love!
KYL xxx

So funny! I am going to see The View this weekend, Bread & Circus's was a fabulous album although the recent one just didn't grab me in the same way!

Oh and nice post :-) xx