furious with school

aliasojo

Blackpool_Saver wrote: »

BUT to slap another pupil across the face must be learned behaviour

What an interesting assertion.

Do you have a background in psychology? I'm interested in why you can make such a categorical statement. You used the word 'must' after all. Do you have a link to studies I could read. I find this subject quite fascinating and would be interested in reading further about what it is that you saw in the OP's post that made you sure this was 'learned behaviour'.




Or are you just an armchair psychologist perhaps?

duchy

I someone had a go at me at work and I responded by smacking them one -I'd rightly get fired. School is no different to work -if you are verbally attacked there are prescribed ways to deal with it. Quite honestly it appears the OP and the school only have his DDs word this wasn't a one off as she apparently made no complaint before. I am NOT saying it didn't happen BUT she needs to learn how to handle verbal bullies whether it is with words herself or reporting it rather than resorting to violence.

seven-day-weekend

My son was bullied at primary school and at college and it didn't stop until he hit the bully back . I'm not saying that it is in any way acceptable behaviour (he was brought up not to hit back), but it worked as it was language the bully understood. I think sometimes it is the only way to stop it, unfortunately

amus

duchy wrote: »

I someone had a go at me at work and I responded by smacking them one -I'd rightly get fired. School is no different to work -if you are verbally attacked there are prescribed ways to deal with it. Quite honestly it appears the OP and the school only have his DDs word this wasn't a one off as she apparently made no complaint before. I am NOT saying it didn't happen BUT she needs to learn how to handle verbal bullies whether it is with words herself or reporting it rather than resorting to violence.

If somebody was coming up to you at work and calling you a slag/!!!!!!/slapper I would imagine it would be dealt with swiftly and appropriately without you ever feeling the need to retaliate.


Unfortunately the same cannot be said for schools.

FBaby

amus wrote: »

Why is it that bullying via name calling is seen as far less serious?

As an adult, if I went up to another adult and started verbally assaulting them, I would expect nothing less than a slap, which is why I don't go around verbally assaulting other adults.

Really? I have had verbal abused thrown at me, usually by very predictable people who don't like others being in their way (I had a woman shouting very unpleasant words the other day at ASDA because I stated that I was in the queue when she barged in front ot me). Thankfully, I didn't feel the need to smack her in the face in retaliation, I just looked at her blanked and ignored her verbal vomiting.

I find it quite immature when adults can't laugh it off when they are being called names and feel the need to use physical violence in response, but maybe they did it as kids too and never learnt to rise above it all.

balletshoes

amus wrote: »

If somebody was coming up to you at work and calling you a slag/!!!!!!/slapper I would imagine it would be dealt with swiftly and appropriately without you ever feeling the need to retaliate.


Unfortunately the same cannot be said for schools.

but in this case, the school (nor the parents) knew the name-calling was going on.

Funky_Bold_Ribena

FBaby wrote: »

Really? I have had verbal abused thrown at me, usually by very predictable people who don't like others being in their way (I had a woman shouting very unpleasant words the other day at ASDA because I stated that I was in the queue when she barged in front ot me). Thankfully, I didn't feel the need to smack her in the face in retaliation, I just looked at her blanked and ignored her verbal vomiting.

I find it quite immature when adults can't laugh it off when they are being called names and feel the need to use physical violence in response, but maybe they did it as kids too and never learnt to rise above it all.

It's an 11 yr old who is being continually bullied, not a one off in a supermarket.

Crikey. How can you even compare the two?

FBaby

I was responding to amus who brought up what he would do as an adult!

Treevo

Funky_Bold_Ribena wrote: »

It's an 11 yr old who is being continually bullied, not a one off in a supermarket.

Crikey. How can you even compare the two?

Do you really think no bullies have ever claimed to be the victims after being reported for assaults?

amus

FBaby wrote: »

I was responding to amus who brought up what he would do as an adult!

Ahem, SHE did not bring up what she would do, she said what she could expect to happen if she thought it acceptable to go round verbally abusing other people.