Should we be expected to pay Mums bills

rose28454

getmore4less wrote: »

Was that true? Do you know?

If not you sould have said something.
(Old people often lie about this sort of thing and their capabilities)

Whatever, she needs to make another appointment.

To my knowledge she has not had a problem during the day for a couple of weeks and wears a pad at night. I am just going to get her some day pads and make the app for the next time oldest sister is home in a few weeks and she can take her. Dont think there is much they can do sign if old age. Younger sister is already bleating that she hopes Mum can come back home tommorowe evening but i dont think so. Work will not be finished until at least thursday end of day. Makes a change for someone else to have to worry about her. Bake home now electrician will call if there are any problems and I will pop in at lunchtime to check. Thanks for everyones kind thoughts.

Spendless

getmore4less wrote: »

Was that true? Do you know?

If not you sould have said something.
(Old people often lie about this sort of thing and their capabilities)

Whatever, she needs to make another appointment.

I was just going to post saying something similar. I've only just dipped in this thread and haven't read it all thru. My Grandmother (in her late 80s) has dementia though she is still capable enough to live indepdenantly and will 'lie' to cover-up that she can't manage as well as she used to. It was so furstrating at first when we didn't understand her illness and couldn't work out why she'd say 'x' to person one and the opposite to person two. Speak to your Mum's GP if you can about your concerns.

rose28454

Spendless wrote: »

I was just going to post saying something similar. I've only just dipped in this thread and haven't read it all thru. My Grandmother (in her late 80s) has dementia though she is still capable enough to live indepdenantly and will 'lie' to cover-up that she can't manage as well as she used to. It was so furstrating at first when we didn't understand her illness and couldn't work out why she'd say 'x' to person one and the opposite to person two. Speak to your Mum's GP if you can about your concerns.

With my Mum she says one thing to one of us and something else to another one of us. Dad had Dementia or Alzheimers for about 18 months before he died but even now we are not allowed to say that he did because Mum says its not true. Its as if it is something to be ashamed of. I think Mum justs plays us off against each other. She is occasionally forgetful but no more than I am myself.
Had a call from Newcastle this morning about Italian pension coming in and spoke to sis in Switzerland as the letter is in Italian and will need translating when we receive it. She asked where money was going and I said into the account where mum's bills are paid from. She started shouting at me that it needed to be in the building society otherwise it would just get spent. I ventured to say that it's Mums money and she can spend it as she likes and maybe she should stop telling her where to spend her money. She denied that she had told her so I just said never mind and put the phone down.
My aunt is planning on coming tommorow to help put house back together after the works but I think it best if Mum stays away until the works are finished whci will probably be Thursday pm at the latest. Eldest sis had something to say about that aswell that Mum needs to be back there tommorow. At least I am able to catch up on things at home in between checking on the work today.

Pollycat

rose28454 wrote: »

I think Mum justs plays us off against each other. She is occasionally forgetful but no more than I am myself.

And that's what I think too, based on what you say.

She sounds very manipulative.

You deserve to be treated much better by her and the majority of your family.

rose28454

Pollycat wrote: »

And that's what I think too, based on what you say.

She sounds very manipulative.

You deserve to be treated much better by her and the majority of your family.

None of them give a toss about me ( except maybe my youngest sister when it suits her ). I have my own personal problems at home with DD that I have to deal with that they know nothing about. I dont want them to know either as it is private but I need to concentrate on my own life and my own problems. As I said the other day I used to have a good relationship with my mother but not anymore. Sis has been on the phone twice already asking when I think Mum can come home-maybe as early as tommorow night. She's joking. Off to hang out my washing and parcel up one of my E-Bay parcels.

Mojisola

rose28454 wrote: »

Off to hang out my washing and parcel up one of my E-Bay parcels.

And ignore phone calls. You can always phone a caller back if you want to speak with them.

getmore4less

Take your time getting the place back in order, just not have the time.

If they want her back home they can fix up the place, just check the work is done right

Put the Aunt off you are too busy to do anything.

rose28454

getmore4less wrote: »

Take your time getting the place back in order, just not have the time.

If they want her back home they can fix up the place, just check the work is done right

Put the Aunt off you are too busy to do anything.

I sent my aunt a message asing her to call me and I am going to ask if they can come Thursday instead of Wednesday as the work should nearly be finished then. I am going to do what earlier poster said and ignore the phone for a while. Younger sis rang and said that she is a prisoner in her own home as she cant leave Mum on her own. I said welcome to my world as although I live in my own home I am at Mums almost as much as i am here. She had rung younger brother saying she wants Mum to come home tommorow evening and he told her Mum should stay away till its all finished. Good for them all to have taste of my life.

Mojisola

rose28454 wrote: »

Younger sis rang and said that she is a prisoner in her own home as she cant leave Mum on her own.

I said welcome to my world

That's so funny! How long has she had Mum with her - one day?

rose28454

Mojisola wrote: »

That's so funny! How long has she had Mum with her - one day?

I know hilarious. Not even 24 hours yet. She picked her up about 4.30 yesterday. She has called me at least 3 times last night and 5 times this morning complaing about it and then in the next breath saying she will have her as long as necessary. Sat on my laptop enjoying the sun outside and thinking at least I dont have to make about 2 or 3 more trips to Mums today. Going to try my best to keep Aunty away till Thursday or Mum will be dumped back tommorow for sure. My younger brother to be fair said she can go to his but she cant do stairs and sis lives in a bungalow. Ha Ha sis enjoy!!!