grandparents finding grandchildren difficult

Dunroamin

Mado wrote: »

Well done you.
A small child cannot hold on easily.
.

I don't think anyone has been suggesting that small children (or little people, as you put it) should have to stand but I can see no reason why kids of 7 or 8 upwards should have any problems.

VikkiiKawaii

The way I see it, on the bus or the train it should be first come first served with seats apart from the obvious (i.e disabled, pregnant, elderly). Why does being older than someone necessarily mean that they need a seat more? I don't believe that I need a seat more than my sister or brother for example although I'm over eighteen and they are both under eighteen.

If anything surely younger people who might not be able to reach the handles in standing room are the ones who should be sitting as they might hurt themselves, whereas an adult who can reach will find it easier to keep themselves steady?

Torry_Quine

Dunroamin wrote: »

I'd give my seat to someone with a baby or a toddler and would have no objection if they put the toddler in the seat rather than sitting them on their lap (although I might think it a bit odd). However, the idea that adults should give up their seats to kids of 11 or 12 is one of the most ridiculous I've ever heard.

I agree and would not be happy if I were standing when a child remained seated. :mad:

bestpud

Mojisola wrote: »

There just isn't the opportunity for most people we come across in daily life to prove to us whether they are worthy of our respect or not!

I taught my kids that they should treat everyone (not just people over 18) with respect. If someone they have regular contact with shows themselves not worthy of their respect, that changes things.

Showing respect for a stranger does not mean they should "obey" them! It's a proactive thing - "Would you like my seat?" that is entirely in the hands of the offerer.

A stranger saying "Mummy said you have to get into my car and you have to do what I said because I'm a grown-up" has nothing to do with politeness or respect and shouldn't be treated with either. That is a case of a stranger proving they are not worthy of respect.

General respect for other human beings is part of good manners and applies to everyone - adults and children.

People over the age of 18 do not gain the right to preferential treatment just because they've come of age.

Should children show respect for other children by offering their seat?

When you get into the idea that adults are more worthy of a seat and should be respected, just because, then it is a very small step to think they should also have the ultimate say and be obeyed.

I don't expect a child to respect me any more than they do any other stranger.

Torry_Quine

bestpud wrote: »

General respect for other human beings is part of good manners and applies to everyone - adults and children.

People over the age of 18 do not gain the right to preferential treatment just because they've come of age.

Should children show respect for other children by offering their seat?

When you get into the idea that adults are more worthy of a seat and should be respected, just because, then it is a very small step to think they should also have the ultimate say and be obeyed.

I don't expect a child to respect me any more than they do any other stranger.

I'm genuinely interested to know if you were brought up as a child to stand for adults and if so why you decided not to tell your children the same?

Torry_Quine

broace wrote: »

Someone has a superiority complex.

It's not a case of feeling superior and others have said the same. It just seems the natural way of things that children stand while adults sit.

FBaby

Torry_Quine wrote: »

It just seems the natural way of things that children stand while adults sit.

What's natural about it? The way I see it, it's a case of the perceived strongest giving up their seat for the perceived weakest. I'm in my 40 and in good health, I would never expect a 10 year old to give up his seat just because I'm older. Saying that, my 9yo was told off for not giving up his seat on the bus the other day. I told him that if it was an elderly lady (which for him will be any one over the age of 60!), he should offer his seat. He's accepted it.

Torry_Quine

broace wrote: »

What in the 1900's?

Children should always have priority of a seat over a healthy Adult. Some of you seem to have a very entitled and superior mentality which isn't at all endearing.

You won't get me to agree here at the most children could possibly have equal status but to say a child can have a seat ahead of an adult, it shows just how society has changed and not for the better.

Torry_Quine

FBaby wrote: »

What's natural about it? The way I see it, it's a case of the perceived strongest giving up their seat for the perceived weakest. I'm in my 40 and in good health, I would never expect a 10 year old to give up his seat just because I'm older. Saying that, my 9yo was told off for not giving up his seat on the bus the other day. I told him that if it was an elderly lady (which for him will be any one over the age of 60!), he should offer his seat. He's accepted it.

I'll ask you what I asked someone else. Were you brought up to give up your seat for an adult and if so why did you not teach that to your child?

FBaby

No, I was brought up to use common sense, ie. does this person seem to need to seat down more than I. That's what I am teaching my children in turn. Nothing to do with direct age, and certainly not the 'adult' status.