Just found out my son is experimenting with other boys

Valli

Why would you prepare your huisband yet? If, as you say, your son is 'experimenting' he has not yet made a decision himself.

[Deleted User]

melanzana wrote: »

Anyone over 18 is an adult. Period.

If him living at your home causes a problem, kick him out.

There is no way you can have him living with you if you are so devastated.

If he has moved out, great. You will probably accept it better.

I cannot imagine a parent not accepting their child for what they are. I know it might be difficult at the start though.

Would you prefer your child was a criminal, drug dealer, rapist, arsonist, fraudster? A ridiculous question.



Being gay is ....eh what these days? Mainstream.. They can do civil partnerships, and have babies too.

What does it fuppin matter. He's your son. Love him. End of.

He is not quite 18 so technically not quite an adult, he has also lead a fairly sheltered life so is still young in so many ways. There is no way on this earth would I kick him out, he hasn't done anything wrong. I am also fully aware that he can have babies and I hope he does because he loves kids. I do love him, end of!

Person_one

You do realise you can't tell your husband don't you?

You have this information because you spied on your son, he hasn't even told you yet. This is his information, his news to tell or not tell as he decides. You can't take that choice away from him.

Fire_Fox

Why has the age changed from 18 to not quite 18 and immature? Most kids of that age are young in many ways.

[Deleted User]

Fire_Fox wrote: »

Why has the age changed from 18 to not quite 18 and immature? Most kids of that age are young in many ways.

It hasn't changed I tend to talk about him as being 18 but his birthday is still about 6 weeks away. But you are right he is still a kid!

Difficult to describe him, he is immature in some ways but he is also quite clever. I suppose what I mean is not mature in the ways of the world rather than immature. And not particularly streetwise.

Errata

Troubled_mum wrote: »

It hasn't changed I tend to talk about him as being 18 but his birthday is still about 6 weeks away. But you are right he is still a kid!

Difficult to describe him, he is immature in some ways but he is also quite clever. I suppose what I mean is not mature in the ways of the world rather than immature. And not particularly streetwise.

Of course he isn't a kid, he's a young man and deserving of respect.

kizzie_nikita

I've read through the whole 17 pages, and I've desperately tried to understand your side of things, hell I've even spoken to my other half who is BI, and only liked guys when he was younger, and we both, still are sickened by this whole thread. I feel very sorry for him, and extremely sorry for yourself if this is the kind of person you come across as.

[Deleted User]

What I can't understand is how many of you can't see how upsetting it is for a parent to discover something about that their child they were totally unaware about. Something that is life changing, to also find out on top of the emotional turmoil he is going through to also find out that he has been upset over an unrequited love.

I may not be particularly eloquent but I do understand that you do not choose your sexuality, you are born with it. I am not disgusted with him, I love him and I just hope beyond all hope that he is happy in his life.

So I am sorry I cannot understand why you are sickened by me.
Not once have I said anything negative about my son, I have constantly said I will support him, when he hopefully finds a partner that partner will be welcome into our family.

I don't really know what else to say, I just keep repeating myself.

I am not sure how many of you are parents of gay children but I suspect the majority of you are not speaking from experience but are imagining how you hope you would be but discussing what might happen is not the same as actually experiencing it. You normally discuss how you would handle the situation, the support you will give your child but at that moment you cannot possible imagine how the emotions will hit you.

jackieb

I really can't understand why Tm is getting such a hard time here. The shock is only natural, no matter how much you love your child and that you only want them to be happy. When my son first told me I felt ill for a week. I'm definitely not a homophobe. I love my son dearly, and always will. But would I have chosen for him to be gay. No, I wouldn't. He can't help who he is, and I wouldn't want him to change just to make me feel better about it. But the world is not really a forgiving place, and I know he'll probably be picked on. I just want an easy life for my child. Who wouldn't want that?

I can't get over why so many people are saying they are disgusted by Troubled mum. Being shocked is a natural reaction. She can no longer help the way she feels, than the way her son can. She has already said she loves him no matter what.

Mara69

Troubled_mum wrote: »

I am not sure how many of you are parents of gay children but I suspect the majority of you are not speaking from experience but are imagining how you hope you would be but discussing what might happen is not the same as actually experiencing it. You normally discuss how you would handle the situation, the support you will give your child but at that moment you cannot possible imagine how the emotions will hit you.

I am, and I think you have behaved really badly in the first instance. You had no right to breach your sons privacy in the manner you did. Now you've found out things you don't like. Bluebeard springs to mind....

Your first post was overly dramatic. Get a grip and get over yourself. Your son is perfectly normal (well, apart from having a nosey, hysterical mother).

jackieb wrote: »

When my son first told me I felt ill for a week

Why?