Boyfriend/husband and lap dancing clubs..???

Person_one

snozberry wrote: »

Where did I say that? Please enlighten me.

He just looks at them, but he comes home to you.

RuthnJasper

Lancslass1982 wrote: »

^ (under ruthnjasper) He knew my brother before we got together, but if we were not together, would not have been invited to the stag do, nor the wedding. I am a bridesmaid and my bf is supposed to be driving me and the bride to the wedding location.

Bad luck Lancslass. Hope this doesn't turn out to be too messy for you. x

Lancslass1982

Thanks RuthnJasper. We also live together in a rented house, so that could also be messy seeing as neither of us can afford to live in the house on our own!:(

snozberry

Person_one wrote: »

He just looks at them, but he comes home to you.

I expect him to come home whenever he goes out, whether that be to work or the corner shop.

He goes out with the lads. They have been to lap dancing clubs.

I go out with the girls. I have been to see male strippers.

The lads sit there, not allowed to touch.

Girls, who see male strippers, are allowed to touch. Heck, they even have willies thrust in their face. Did you read that bit in my first comment??

Some of the women see the men as, as you put,an object and some of the men do as well.

Both are being oggled over.

Now, shall we have a bit of fairness to your comment?? Both genders are capable of viewing the opposite gender as being an object.

If you are truly concerned about men seeing female strippers then you must be concerned with women seeing male strippers. Or be insecure.

ETA when he does come home from being out with the lads (they don't always go to those clubs) he is usually anything but aroused. He is usually in need for a cup of tea and sleep. He can't cope with late nights but that is just an age thing.

Tropez

To be fair, I don't view strippers and other such adult entertainers as a "bit of meat". I respect that they're human beings, with thoughts, feelings and personalities but I also respect their choice to use their looks to get men to part with money. I think it's quite clever actually.

I remember a glamour model/TV chat girl being accused of being nothing but a dumb bimbo once on some television show. She retorted that she had a degree from Durham University (I forget the subject) but thought she would make £150k a year for working fifteen hours a week doing what she was doing while she could and I can't really fault her on that one. She also said that working in strip clubs and doing webcam shows paid for most of her university tuition.

Some might see her and others a piece of meat. Others might see her as a businesswoman. Some might see her as a service provider. Buying into her services does not necessarily mean that one views her as something subhuman.

Lancslass1982

^ I don't particularly have any bad feelings towards strippers/lap dancers either. Nor is this about looks or my insecurities. Not to blow my own trumpet, but looks and figure wise, I'm alright!:D It's not about me fearing the girl was better looking or had a better figure. She more than like wasn't/didn't (that's not to say that I'm up my own a**e - I'm not!) All my feelings of distaste are aimed towards my bf and his choices.

Person_one

snozberry wrote: »

If you are truly concerned about men seeing female strippers then you must be concerned with women seeing male strippers. Or be insecure.

You asked if degradation was a valid argument, I answered, I'm sorry that the answer bothers you so much.

I don't like male strippers either, but there aren't nearly as many cultural issues around objectification of male bodies, you have to admit that.

Stooping to calling me insecure is just silly.

Person_one

Tropez wrote: »

I remember a glamour model/TV chat girl being accused of being nothing but a dumb bimbo once on some television show. She retorted that she had a degree from Durham University (I forget the subject) but thought she would make £150k a year for working fifteen hours a week doing what she was doing while she could and I can't really fault her on that one. She also said that working in strip clubs and doing webcam shows paid for most of her university tuition.

What a shame that she worked so hard to pay for the degree and then completely wasted it.

Tropez

Person_one wrote: »

What a shame that she worked so hard to pay for the degree and then completely wasted it.

Who is to say that she has? She's earning a lot of money in a tough economic climate which will give her a good footing in life until such a time that she decides to put her degree to use if that is what she wants to do.

snozberry

Person_one wrote: »

You asked if degradation was a valid argument, I answered, I'm sorry that the answer bothers you so much.

I don't like male strippers either, but there aren't nearly as many cultural issues around objectification of male bodies, you have to admit that.

Stooping to calling me insecure is just silly.

but your comment did not answer the question. I was actually referring to a woman's choice to work there. If a woman was forced against her will to work there, then yes, it most definately is. But I don't see how it can be if she chooses to work there.

There are differences. Men are laughed at, groped. It's disgusting how some women choose to behave around male strippers. One of my friends dates a male stripper and he has offers from women left, right and centre. No, he doesn't take them up on their offers because he is in a committed relationship.


You calling me silly because I questioned your possible insecurity makes me wonder if I touched a raw nerve.