Finding geeky/nerdy girls for dating...

OptimusNemesis

Well, I just thought I'd post back here and update on how things have gone for me... I wish I could say that I've found someone but no such luck yet!

I've had a few replies, met some people off of OKC but I'm finding so many people lie on there, which is frustrating as I'm completely honest on my profile (otherwise what's the point?).

So far I've had two that have made themselves out to be geeks and have put all sorts of things in their profiles and said all kinds of things to back up their geek credentials but then when I've met them they've admitted that they haven't read the things they've said they had, done the things they've said they done and so on.

I've had offers to join threesomes (not my thing), I've got someone who constantly sends me suggestive texts and has told me she has a 'lust crush' on me (I had to put my phone on silent at work one day as she was texting me so much that it was getting on everyone's nerves!) - I guess that's sort of flattering but I'm not the kind of guy that likes to meet just for sex... I don't think a long lasting and meaningful relationship is created that way (maybe that's just me being old fashioned though).

I joined a couple of other sites and for some reason on one of them I'm getting lots of messages from women much older than me. Some of them seem very nice but I'm not up for being a toy boy! lol Another site has gotten me lots of messages from women in the US and Canada. Frustrating because a couple of them have sounded very interesting to me but they're hardly local and I don't want a mega LDR type thing... if I was going to do that, I'd at least want to be in the same country. One lady sent me a lovely message saying how I was very handsome... shame she was nearly as old as my mum and on another continent really! lol

I met someone else in person a few weeks back and she was nice but she had some sort of back complaint which meant we had to stop walking about every 3 or 4 steps so she could wait a couple of minutes before doing the same again. She hadn't told me about this before meeting so I felt quite bad that I'd suggested going to the Forbidden Planet shop from Waterloo...not realising it was going to be so difficult for her. She insisted we still went but it took us about 3 hours to get there (I'm not joking either - it really did as she didn't want to ride on a bus!). Nice girl but I'm quite an active person in that I walk quite long distances and often pretty fast too... so don't think that would work.

I was supposed to meet up with someone else but after talking to her for a while by text, I concluded she had so little time that she'd never be able to meet. I asked her and she pretty much confirmed that, so I had to call it a day on that one before we'd even met.

I've had a few flake out on me - I've become quite adept at spotting the flakers now so it's not such a surprise anymore.

I did get talking to someone in a sci-fi forum who sounded great - she liked a lot of the same things as me, lived just up the road and we started emailing really long emails to eachother... but she seems to have gone a bit weird on me now. I sent her a couple of pics of me and she came back saying that she thought I looked lovely and attached a couple of pics of her... well, I couldn't open them so I emailed back and told her the attachments wouldn't open... and that's pretty much the last correspondence I've had with her! What was that all about? lol

I got chatted up by someone at a Transformers convention I was at a couple of weeks ago which was nice but she was too young for me (she was 19). That's the first time I've ever met a member of the opposite sex that not only liked Transformers but also was a big Knight Rider fan (best show ever, btw)! Too bad she was 13 years younger than me! lol

I've got one more person to meet from OKCupid... we've just arranged to meet up in September. I must admit I had her down as somebody that would just suddenly stop messaging but she has surprised me so far... I won't go into detail but I do have my reasons for doubting it'll get too far (not a lack of confidence thing or anything like that, it's just more about her apparent attitude and the fact she's already said she may be moving to another country...). Well, I'll guess we'll see...

- G

beverley1471

Well i've only just started online dating, you've got me very worried now! I've only met one person so far and we were definately not suited. Will give it a go for a while. Don't write off girls who arn't geeks, my late husband was the biggest geek out their and i'm not at all. We were very happy together, I would do geeky things with him and he would do non geeky things with me. It worked out well.

Gigervamp

Are you on Twitter? I know a couple who met on there.

LannieDuck

Some of my geeky friends have had success through the Guardian dating website, although I guess it depends a bit on your politics...

Both my sister and I met our husbands LARPing. Might be worth a go if you fancy running around the woods with a latex sword?

Gloomendoom

OptimusNemesis wrote: »

I guess that's sort of flattering but I'm not the kind of guy that likes to meet just for sex... I don't think a long lasting and meaningful relationship is created that way

No, but is a good way to get galloping knob rot. Steer well clear. You don't know where she's been.

Yuk

*max*

Gloomendoom wrote: »

No, but is a good way to get galloping knob rot. Steer well clear. You don't know where she's been.

Yuk

I am so stealing that expression!

gadgeteer_2

I'm definitely a geek. Geek & proud. I work in IT, tonight have debugged a Citrix server and designed a new network.

I've watched every single episode of Trek but hate Bab-5. I have more computers in my home than people, two internet connections (you can never have enough bandwidth!) and was hopelessly addicted World of Warcraft a few years ago to the point where when my (now-ex) GF appeared naked to lure my from my screen my first thought was "!!!!!!, now I have to miss my raid!"

In my opinion you are going about this the wrong way. You are looking for a geeky woman. I'm sure there must be some somewhere but I've yet to meet one. So you are in effect trying to find the proverbial needle in a haystack.

So we know about your geek credentials. What do you do that isn't geeky? My fiancee isn't geeky at all. She is intelligent and without trying to sound big headed, very attractive. But she neither cares for or watches my Sci-fi shows. Nor does she get excited when my new server arrives at home. That said I don't care nor know how many plants/flowers I have in the house and all i know is she has too many pairs of shoes!

What we do have is shared values, similar personalities and the same goals in life. We talk about each others work. We go out socialising with friends, some of whom are a bit geeky, most who are not. And we both go to the same military fitness club which is like our shared hobby.

My point is this. Being a geek nowadays is fine. It's even to a certain extent attractive. IT geek's are pretty well paid and don't come home smelling of toilet drains or motor oil. Women also think that geek's are also less likely to stray, will be more faithful and responsible than jack the lad in the pub.

HOWEVER......if all you are is a geek then that's simply not attractive. Period. Get out there in the real world. Go get a drink with some friends. Start other hobbies. And go out with non-geeky women. You never know....you may just like it!

epskie

I am absolutely :rotfl::rotfl::rotfl: at galloping knob rot!

OP are you a Star Wars fan? I have plenty of contacts if you are

euronorris

Emmzi wrote: »

go to eastercon, redemption, novacon, scifi london, comicon, expo, etc etc. Look for groups on meetup.com. There are many geeky London pub meets like B&B7 and LOTNA.

I was just going to suggest the same thing! I've made friends with so many girls and guys (some single, some not) through fan conventions, the OP can too and will more than likely meet quite a few single girls that he likes.

Not all of the girls who attend fan conventions are crazy fan girls. Honest (though you do have to watch out for one or two! lol)!

Elsewhere

I'd recommend conventions, too. They are a lot of fun, even if you don't find "true love". My daughter and I went to the Eastercon that had Neil Gaiman as a guest star - there were loads of activities as well as meeting the guests (I think you get a slightly older crowd than at anime cons.) My daughter has made loads of friends at cons, and found a couple of boyfriends - she met her fiance at a Uni anime club.

One of my friends is an organiser for Redemption, she keeps trying to persuade me to go...

However, if you want a con where the vast majority of attendees are women, try a Supernatural convention (for instance, Asylum http://www.rogueevent.co.uk/wordpress/?page_id=1775#)

BTW, did you know that New Scientist magazine has a dating site?

http://dating.newscientist.com/s/