My Dad 'tricked' me into giving him £5,000 & now can't afford to pay me it back

MyLastFiver

LovelyLeeds wrote: »

it's (sadly) a part of human nature, so you have to determine whether it's worth breaking up your family over or sometimes, being the bigger person and moving on.

What a twisted perspective, putting the blame on the victim. It is not her who is "breaking up the family" - the man who stole her money has done this.

She is already "the bigger person" whether she chooses to chase the money or not. Because she is not a liar and a thief.

Garry_Anderson

MyLastFiver wrote: »

What a twisted perspective, putting the blame on the victim. It is not her who is "breaking up the family" - the man who stole her money has done this.

She is already "the bigger person" whether she chooses to chase the money or not. Because she is not a liar and a thief.

It annoys me that some look on the victim as the one who has to 'put things right'.

This is not deliberatively being 'argumentative' or 'confrontational' - this was brought about entirely by the thief.

January20

MyLastFiver wrote: »

What a twisted perspective, putting the blame on the victim. It is not her who is "breaking up the family" - the man who stole her money has done this.

She is already "the bigger person" whether she chooses to chase the money or not. Because she is not a liar and a thief.

I agree completely with this, and would like to add, why should SHE worry about possibly breaking up the family, when her father didn't care a jot about it when HE stole her money, when she was young and he was the only parent she had left, and he knew she trusted him, and when he tried to do the same with her younger sister by asking for 20K? What kind of family is there left to break up? Would it be so bad to not have a relationship with such a man? For the sake of what? shared blood?

colazombie

There is no money 'to chase'. It's gone. He has none to pay back so forget it. Bloods thicker than water

January20

colazombie wrote: »

There is no money 'to chase'. It's gone. He has none to pay back so forget it. Bloods thicker than water

Origin of this phrase some of you have been so fond of using on this thread:

http://www.phrases.org.uk/bulletin_board/19/messages/141.html


During the ritual of ancient covenant making, the two parties involved would divide an animal in half, and stand together in the blood, with their right hands clasp, and swear a mutual oath binding them to each other. In some cases, each party would cut their respective hands, bind them together with the other party, allowing their blood to mingle. The resulting union of this blood oath was never to be broken. In effect, the two participants in the covenant would become "blood brothers," and thus become one flesh.

The relationship born of this union was so knit, that brothers made through the blood of covenants were closer to each other than brothers who were born from the same womb. Hence, blood (of the covenant) is thicker than water (of the womb).



Seems to me that this phrase is used completely incorrectly nowadays!

Garry_Anderson

colazombie wrote: »

There is no money 'to chase'. It's gone. He has none to pay back so forget it. Bloods thicker than water

Is that because he is never going to earn any more money in his lifetime

MyLastFiver

colazombie wrote: »

Bloods thicker than water

I wonder if the father thought this when he stole the money his dead wife had bequeathed his daughter.

colazombie

No I guess he probably intended to pay it back, or open the ISA at a later date. I'm not sure. At 18 you are old enough to open an ISA so it's a shame op didn't do it herself. It's a heartbreaking story I bad for the way her dad has treated her. But I don't see any viable options of getting it back so it's best to put it behind you now and hope dad learnt a lesson

dzug1

chesky369 wrote: »

How can she have a loving relationship with someone who stole from her? It's actually a criminal act even though she can't prove it. Would you say children who are abused by their fathers should maintain a 'loving relationship' with their fathers?

The silence on this subject of those who are attacking the daughter is telling.

MyLastFiver

colazombie wrote: »

No I guess he probably intended to pay it back, or open the ISA at a later date.

Have you read the thread? He spent it on a new driveway.

I don't see any viable options of getting it back

£100 per month for 50 months, enforced by a court if the old twister doesn't cough up.