Son's father sent to prison,what do I tell him?

gardner1

skintchick wrote: »

Why wouldn;t a 5yo be able to understand? My DD is 2 and she would be able to grasp the basics of Daddy did something naughty and has to go somewhere called prison so he can say he is sorry and he will be back soon.

It is 'only' drink driving, not rape or murder, so there's no awkward stuff regarding the crime to explain.

Children understand far more than people generally give them credit for. I am a big one for truth all the way (and no SchemingGypsy, I don't do Father Christmas. DD knows that is just a story, and she understood).

bet your a bundle of fun to live with

gardner1

Gazing_On_Sunsets wrote: »

"When you go to Big School, if you are very naughty, you might get put in detention. This is when you have to stay after school for up to an hour. Well, daddy is a grown up but he has been naughty so he has a grown up's detention. He knows he's been silly and he's very sorry but you'll see him again soon, shall we draw him a nice card?"

Also, family visits in prison can be pretty good, as far as it goes. I did story-telling at one in the midlands. There, the family visits had a lot of imput from the Mother's Union so they had face painting and craft and stuff. The visits were all in a large room with minimal, unobtrustive officer presence, soft chairs around low tables and toys for the kiddies. However the prisoner needs to be approved for a family visit and the procedures differ from place to place; on a short sentence he may not qualify. I'm writing this in case it helps someone else reading the thread I suppose...!

No offence but who in their right mind would want to take children to see mum or dad in prison :eek:

gardner1

mynameissophie wrote: »

I definitly agree with Pinkshoes. He deserves to know the thruth overwise when he grows up and learn the truth, I'm guessing that he will be veru upset

i think a 16yr old would be able cope with it better than a 5 yr old

missbishi

skintchick wrote: »

It is 'only' drink driving, not rape or murder, so there's no awkward stuff regarding the crime to explain.
QUOTE]

Yeah, because nobody was ever killed by a drunk driver, were they?

Lotus-eater

gardner1 wrote: »

No offence but who in their right mind would want to take children to see mum or dad in prison :eek:

It's till your Mum and Dad isn't it?

Better you see them than not. For a short while it wouldn't matter, for a long while I think it would.

gardner1

Lotus-eater wrote: »

It's till your Mum and Dad isn't it?

Better you see them than not. For a short while it wouldn't matter, for a long while I think it would.

if its mum or dad it makes no difference just make some excuse up working away/holiday/mum and dad having time apart etc must be better than telling small child that dads in prison

Lotus-eater

gardner1 wrote: »

if its mum or dad it makes no difference just make some excuse up working away/holiday/mum and dad having time apart etc must be better than telling small child that dads in prison

I expect it depends so much on your personal situation, that it's impossible to generalise.

scheming_gypsy

gardner1 wrote: »

No offence but who in their right mind would want to take children to see mum or dad in prison :eek:

Lots of people do, although it's usually when they're away for a lot longer than a couple of months. If you're doing a long stretch you wouldn't want to go for 10+ years without seeing your kids.

gardner1

scheming_gypsy wrote: »

Lots of people do, although it's usually when they're away for a lot longer than a couple of months. If you're doing a long stretch you wouldn't want to go for 10+ years without seeing your kids.

10+yrs now thats a different matter daddy has been very very naughty nad been sent to the BIG HOUSE

i was giving my views on original post on dad going away for few months