My eldest has changed his xmas list

victory

CH27 wrote: »

The way to ''save him'' is to say no! To be firm & calm with him and to have strict ground rules.

Every thread & every post is like groundhog day.

Only you can break the cycle.

If you carry on like this you will be the one who ruins xmas for yourself.

Xmas is now sorted thanks:j

victory

Crisp_£_note wrote: »

I suggest as the OP is not online at the moment we just leave this post be. Weve given our advice let them take it or leave it they have the choice. I half expect it to be the same scenario once op returnes. .

First it was driving lessons (not cheap but a useful starter of 10 lessons and test then he pays for the rest), now its a laptop what will it be next? :eek: When you say a Mac I hope you meant a big burger, dink & fries and not a Mac laptop?

Of course macs as in food:rotfl::rotfl: it is not the same but thanks for presuming, it was ab fab thanks, as for the driving lessons it has been assumed on here I am buying him 10 can you imagine 10:eek: no way he has had already 10 done, I am not buying him 10 each one is £20

victory

Lunar_Eclipse wrote: »

I really think you need to take a huge step back. You are continuing to be very melodramatic about a request for a laptop (although I know it's more than that.)

In general I think everyone has basically said the same thing on this thread, yet you find the responses confusing. To make this as simple as possible I will just say this isn't really about the laptop, or anything your son says and does.

This is all about you: your feelings about your parenting and wanting things to change but not being prepared to change anything. It takes a strong person to change, not a weak one Victory!

You can't change your son. You need to change first. I also think you need to get his behaviour into perspective. You are spending far too much time thinking about it. Do you have a busy and full life outside of the family home? I mean why on earth would you want to being up the laptop or Xmas again, today? Get on with whatever you normally do on Saturday and forget about Christmas. Ask him to let you know where he'll be spending it on Xmas Eve and spend the time between now and then building some bridges.

Thanks Lunar:D:D

victory

Lunar_Eclipse wrote: »

No, I think everyone here has said the same thing: do not bring it up with him again.

I can only assume that you want to and thus you have imagined that you have read that here. Same for the other 'contradictions'; I think they basically differ from what you want to do so you think you are reading differences that aren't generally there, since they differ with the way you are seeing things.

Never brought it up, he came up with it, we had a great day thanks:D

victory

make_me_wise wrote: »

.

Tis the season to be jolly not the season to be suffering spoilt brats.

Jolly we are;)

Bumpmakesfour

Victory..are you sure you went to McD's and not the pub?

Lunar_Eclipse

victory wrote: »

Never brought it up, he came up with it, we had a great day thanks:D

Good. I'm really pleased you had some 'normality' today.

Another thing I read once that I have used when I felt struck in a rut with poor behaviour from one child, trying to change things to avoid a downward negative spiral that you might find useful is 'fake it until you make it.' Once you start acting (literally!) in a certain, different, way to your norm, it starts to become second nature and you start creating the change you want to see/be. Try it.

Had to come back and edit to say I'm so pleased things are moving forward positively and you seem in much higher spirits. x

dirtysexymonkey

Bumpmakesfour wrote: »

Victory..are you sure you went to McD's and not the pub?

she does seem very merry.:D

im glad youve got this issue sorted op, so i eagerly await your next thread when well do it all over again!:rotfl::T:)

victory

...................:rotfl::rotfl:

dirtysexymonkey

victory wrote: »

My birthday back in september I go far too merry and stayed off the stuff for oh more than a month since rememberance sunday have not had any at all but will have on xmas eve/day:rotfl::rotfl:

it's not been 'more than a month' since remembrance sunday. so can i borrow your TARDIS please?;)