bit disappointed

Bloomin_Freezing2

Just read some old posts and can't think why OP would want to marry him anyway! I am amazed that even with all his bad debts (as writtem by OP) that he can spend 40 quid down the pub, wish I could! Considering OP knows how much debt her OH is in I should think she'd be happy with any old toy ring as an engagement ring. Interesting to see OP doesn't want her OH to know how much money she earns. Whyever not? If you want to marry him you shouldn't have secrets, are you scared he'll rip you off?

Margaret52129

Well, I'm in the same camp as most - it's not the ring that's at fault, but the way it was bought. I also think that it was a 'lets make her happy cos we argued' sort of thing. Even if he's not a romantic, it's not the way to get engaged. I really can't see a happy ending to this relationship, unfortunately.

My OH and I had a house for 2 years (didn't live together in those days - not the done thing!) with no proposal or anything, but then he said we could go out and choose a ring (£29 from H Samual) and set a wedding date for 3 months later. I went to buy my own wedding ring (£10!). We had a registry wedding and a total of 12 (including us) guests.

Even though he's wasn't and isn't romantic, I know his heart is in the right place, and even after 33 years of married life I know it's still there next to mine!

castleton

If you really want to buy a ring look in shops that buy rings etc and sell them secondhand. I have had some super rings that cost much less than they would new. I even haggle about the price and always get something Knocked off ( not suggesting you do )

Any

Well, I feel that as much as some are saying "if you loved him the price would not matter" and I would generally agree, I feel from the OP that the problem is "if he really loved me he would make it special for me".

My OH did not even buy my ring (family diamonds), but he took me to the shop to have it set in any design I fancied, because it was my engagement ring and I am going to wear it for the rest of my life. It was the thought that counted!!

If my OH said let's get engaged and then took me to Argos and asked me "will this do then" he would fly out of the window!!

Wickedkitten

Any wrote: »

Well, I feel that as much as some are saying "if you loved him the price would not matter" and I would generally agree, I feel from the OP that the problem is "if he really loved me he would make it special for me".

My OH did not even buy my ring (family diamonds), but he took me to the shop to have it set in any design I fancied, because it was my engagement ring and I am going to wear it for the rest of my life. It was the thought that counted!!

If my OH said let's get engaged and then took me to Argos and asked me "will this do then" he would fly out of the window!!

Seems to me that she was happy enough before her mate told her about her ring. Plus she's the one that suggested going to Argos.

Any

Wickedkitten wrote: »

Seems to me that she was happy enough before her mate told her about her ring. Plus she's the one that suggested going to Argos.

I doubt she didn't know about her mate's ring before... She might have not know the specifics, but it would have been obvious it wasn't from Argos "will this do then" ring.
And she only suggested Argos as the first shop had nothing and he was set on getting it over with...

NickyBat

I hope she comes back and updates.

Kaemi

Surely this is trolling at its finest? No one would think a healthy relationship meant keeping secrets as big as what you earn from your spouse, and no one thinks getting engaged is a healthy way to patch up an arguement! The ring doesn't matter the relationship does, and any man who asks "will that do then" while probably buying himself treats worth more than the ring cost is just not that into you.

Emmylou_2

My fiance kinda proposed in May, on holiday. I say kinda because we'd discussed it before (I had a "pre-engagement" ring on my right hand - he was sure he loved me but not sure that he was ready for marriage at that time). Plus, I hadn't met his parents before the holiday (that was the reason we went away for a week in May), so if they hated me, it would make things difficult. Basically, he said he'd like to marry me some time in the future. I said - OK, next year? He said yes. I said - so are we engaged? He said no. I explained to him that engagements didn't necessarily mean that we'd be married within six weeks -just that we were going to get married. So engaged we are!

As for ring - at the time, we moved the "pre-engagement" ring onto my left hand and when we got back from holiday, started to look around for rings. The ones I wanted were about £1,800 over here :eek: but about €350 in Cyprus (where his parents live). We'd already arranged to go to their place for two weeks later in the summer (we go on Wednesday...yay) and said that we'd get the ring over there. It's actually cheaper to do this even if we include the cost of the flights!

However, a couple of weeks after the engagement, his folks got in touch and offered us the choice of either his grandma's ring or great-grandma's ring - I've seen a photo of one of them and it's gorgeous - if I like either and it's an appropriate size (or can be resized) then it's mine. I was over the moon at this - not only does it mean I get a ring of a value we couldn't afford, it means his parents definitely like me!

We've now been engaged for nearly two months and I can honestly say that if I end up with the ring I've got forever, then that's fine. It's not about a bit of bling on my finger, it's about the fact that next September, we're going to stand up in front of our families and friends and say that we'll be together forever.

kathy206

The most beautiful engagement ring I've seen is my sister's. It was a second hand 18 carat solitaire, and cost about a hundred quid. My ring is diamond cluster 9 carat and cost £90. I could have had a much,much more expensive ring, but I couldn't see the point in spending a massive amount.
OP it sounds as though the engagement is pretty much planned on the back of a fag packet tbh (sorry:o) where is the romance, the sense of occasion that should come with an engagement? You and your boyf need to have a chat I think, about what you want from the relationship.