Can an affair ever have a happy ending?

euronorris

1echidna wrote: »

Sorry somehow that came out as an attempt to put you on the spot with your personal situation, it wasn't. There is a difference between a voluntary denial and a denial in response to concern by an OH.

I agree.

OH has told me he wouldn't ever do it, but this has been when we were discussing the subject in general.

If he said it after I had raised concerns, because of suspicions I had, then it would still be very difficult to believe still. I've had all those denials from my ex and he was, in fact, doing exactly as I suspected.

gratefulforhelp_2

nickyhutch wrote: »

Or that they are very complacent (never a good thing in a relationship).

Better for that person than being so wary that they have to be constantly vigilant - very wearing.

Is it your view that complacent partners deserve to lose their OH's then?

1echidna wrote: »

Marriage vows are more than just being faithful.

Of course.

1echidna

poet123 wrote: »

Dear me, I surely did hit a raw nerve. You must do as you see fit, I am sure we all await being enlightened by you.

You have a habit of either starting threads or making random posts designed to pique, and to allow you the limelight you appear to crave, so long as they play by your rules.

Akin to the school yard where if the game is not going the way the starter of it expects and needs, he takes his ball in.;)

Rarely works in the schoolyard, and never in rl, and certainly not on a forum.

:rotfl::rotfl::rotfl::rotfl:

nickyhutch

gratefulforhelp wrote: »

Better for that person than being so wary that they have to be constantly vigilant - very wearing.

Is it your view that complacent partners deserve to lose their OH's then?

That's not quite what I sais, is it? It's my view that there's a middle line between being complacent (where you can begin to take someone for granted) and being "wary and over-vigilant", which can of course be a stress on both parties.

gratefulforhelp_2

nickyhutch wrote: »

That's not quite what I sais, is it? It's my view that there's a middle line between being complacent (where you can begin to take someone for granted) and being "wary and over-vigilant", which can of course be a stress on both parties.

That's why it was a question.

catkins

I am not complacent nor do I take my OH for granted.

I know we both have the same views on infidelity as we do on marriage. We got married intending it to be for ever. Neither of us believe in divorce (we are not particularly religious) and if our marriage had not worked out we would have separated but not divorced as neither of us would marry again.

I know I would never cheat in any circumstances and I believe him when he says he never would. We both truly believe there is never ever a reason to cheat. It is disgusting and shows no love or, perhaps more importantly, respect for your partner. We not only love each other we also like and respect each other and so would not treat the other in this way.

My OH actually thinks that being unfaithful should be classed as an actual offence.

Over the years we have seen many friends and work colleagues have affairs and we have both always expressed to each other how we felt about it. In almost all the cases it has changed the way we feel about that person. Neither of us can have respect for people who cheat on their partners

People always seem to have a problem that I trust my OH 100% but I think it is sad that more people cannot say the same.

1echidna

catkins wrote: »

I am not complacent nor do I take my OH for granted.

I know we both have the same views on infidelity as we do on marriage. We got married intending it to be for ever. Neither of us believe in divorce (we are not particularly religious) and if our marriage had not worked out we would have separated but not divorced as neither of us would marry again.

I know I would never cheat in any circumstances and I believe him when he says he never would. We both truly believe there is never ever a reason to cheat. It is disgusting and shows no love or, perhaps more importantly, respect for your partner. We not only love each other we also like and respect each other and so would not treat the other in this way.

My OH actually thinks that being unfaithful should be classed as an actual offence.

Over the years we have seen many friends and work colleagues have affairs and we have both always expressed to each other how we felt about it. In almost all the cases it has changed the way we feel about that person. Neither of us can have respect for people who cheat on their partners

People always seem to have a problem that I trust my OH 100% but I think it is sad that more people cannot say the same.

Sorry but I must be sceptical. I wonder if you are the kind of person who is habitually certain of things where no such certainty can exist.

Errata

My OH actually thinks that being unfaithful should be classed as an actual offence.

Dear me, what punishment does he think would be suitable? Death by stoning, or something else?

candygirl

Errata wrote: »

Dear me, what punishment does he think would be suitable? Death by stoning, or something else?

Death by castration?:rotfl::rotfl::rotfl::rotfl:

Errata

candygirl wrote: »

Death by castration?:rotfl::rotfl::rotfl::rotfl:

There's always the Bobbit solution However ........ stoning is gender neutral, sexual orientation neutral, age neuteral - so it fits all and any who stray from the primrose path of fidelity.