Can an affair ever have a happy ending?

POPPYOSCAR

Person_one wrote: »

You know, I don't think I've seen a single poster express that...

Then you cannot have read all the posts.

POPPYOSCAR

maggie60 wrote: »

Hi, I am a long time lurker on this site but so feel need to chat. I was married once and separated 24 years ago. My ex found someone after 8 weeks and well I never felt the need to do,I raised my children and never got involved with anyone. My youngest now 23 and three years ago i began to have a connection with a married man and yes i got involved. Now i am a Catholic and I fell in love and still am. He was and still is married, I never intented for this to happen and regret to this day it has. Never felted and wanted to give all to any one before. I love him but dont know how he feels about me, I am so full of guilt yet in love. I dont get meals, gifts or anything like that, just the odd text, I know its wrong and will always be, yet I am now over 50 and I just love him. I ended all contact over 6 weeks ago and trying so hard to let go and struggle to this day to do so. I go to bed every night and beg for forgiveness and I just want my life to end so I dont have to be the bad person I am and be in so much pain. I never asked the question as I knew the answer, It would never have been me, never would be. He is also A catholic and would never leave his marriage, he would never hurt his kids. I recognise that but god its so painful and its not worth this ache and pain that I feel every day. I wish you all the happiness in the world and hope you get what you want. xx

Well done for having the courage to make the break.You can get over being in love in time.

I hope you can now meet someone who can give you the love and relationship that will make you happy.

euronorris

POPPYOSCAR wrote: »

I did not say you had.

It has been said on this thread I just did not want to direct it at any one person.

I'm not sure they did.

I don't recall anyone saying that, and I had a quick check back and couldn't see it. Are you sure?

(to be clear, I'm not having a dig here, just genuinely don't recall having read that - I hate written word sometimes, it can be so easily misunderstood)

Kefi

My misspent days of youth are long gone, however I have shared flats and digs with a number of singles who had affairs with married men. I recall with great clarity the nights they sat at home and waited their youth away for someone who wanted to have their cake and eat it.
I heard all the tales of what 'she' was like and how 'she' made his life hell, and he only stayed for the kids.
The flatmate would spend all her time getting ready for when his nibs came round, and therefore be the antithesis of what was at home.

Finally in some cases the flatmate got her man, and within a year or so of marriage had a couple of kids and became the 'she' who had been so despised before.
His nibs would now embark on an affair and my exflatmate would become the 'she', and come round to me with kids in tow. Tired out through lack of sleep, and the hassle she received from the 1st wife, I would listen with great sympathy.

I say to you- a leopard can never change its spots.
As for me,married men were taboo.
Life is for living girl and there is so much out their to grab, so go get it with people who have all the time in the world for you.

1echidna

poet123 wrote: »

Do grow up, report the post if you wish to, and I really don't accept "warnings" from other posters, particularly those who are prone to post provocative comments to elicit some "excitement". If you invite comment on any form of adultery ( which you did) you will get it.

Whether you "accept" warnings or not is immaterial to me. I will still show your posts up for what they are if you come the raw prawn with me.

a1969baby

1echidna wrote: »

Whether you "accept" warnings or not is immaterial to me. I will still show your posts up for what they are if you come the raw prawn with me.

Not quite sure what you meant by that but...... :rotfl:

POPPYOSCAR

euronorris wrote: »

I'm not sure they did.

I don't recall anyone saying that, and I had a quick check back and couldn't see it. Are you sure?

(to be clear, I'm not having a dig here, just genuinely don't recall having read that - I hate written word sometimes, it can be so easily misunderstood)

Yes I am sure.

When you and Person one posted in response to my post I checked back to make sure I was not going mad.


I do agree that things can be misunderstood.( Sometimes I am doing several things at once and just jot down my thoughts so I suppose to some it may seem like I am being abrupt. I never intend to be rude or
have a go at anyone though.)

I think it is great that people have solid relationships/marriages but I always think 'never say never'. I have seen it so many times in various situations 'my OH would never cheat/ my children would never smoke, take drugs, lie, steal' and those words have come back to haunt them.

1echidna

a1969baby wrote: »

Not quite sure what you meant by that but...... :rotfl:

google is your friend .... :D

a1969baby

maggie60 wrote: »

Hi, I am a long time lurker on this site but so feel need to chat. I was married once and separated 24 years ago. My ex found someone after 8 weeks and well I never felt the need to do,I raised my children and never got involved with anyone. My youngest now 23 and three years ago i began to have a connection with a married man and yes i got involved. Now i am a Catholic and I fell in love and still am. He was and still is married, I never intented for this to happen and regret to this day it has. Never felted and wanted to give all to any one before. I love him but dont know how he feels about me, I am so full of guilt yet in love. I dont get meals, gifts or anything like that, just the odd text, I know its wrong and will always be, yet I am now over 50 and I just love him. I ended all contact over 6 weeks ago and trying so hard to let go and struggle to this day to do so. I go to bed every night and beg for forgiveness and I just want my life to end so I dont have to be the bad person I am and be in so much pain. I never asked the question as I knew the answer, It would never have been me, never would be. He is also A catholic and would never leave his marriage, he would never hurt his kids. I recognise that but god its so painful and its not worth this ache and pain that I feel every day. I wish you all the happiness in the world and hope you get what you want. xx

My heart goes out to you, be strong, you will get over this. You obviously have a lot of love to give and I hope you find someone that you are able to share it with fully x

1echidna

POPPYOSCAR wrote: »

Yes I am sure.

When you and Person one posted in response to my post I checked back to make sure I was not going mad.


I do agree that things can be misunderstood.( Sometimes I am doing several things at once and just jot down my thoughts so I suppose to some it may seem like I am being abrupt. I never intend to be rude or
have a go at anyone though.)

I think it is great that people have solid relationships/marriages but I always think 'never say never'. I have seen it so many times in various situations 'my OH would never cheat/ my children would never smoke, take drugs, lie, steal' and those words have come back to haunt them.

Possbly it may happen more often when partner says OH would never cheat. Sign that OH is being taken for granted.