Can an affair ever have a happy ending?

gratefulforhelp_2

Welshwoofs wrote: »

PTN's what by the way? You appear to have finished your posting mid sentence.

The s is there because she has more than one purple toe nail.

The apostrophe is for free!!

Lotus-eater

Welshwoofs wrote: »

What you are quoting isn't a blanket appraisal of the thread; it's a general comment about the apportioning of blame in affairs. What you didn't quote was a comment on this thread and it may be right or may be wrong (I've not read every posting so it's just my general impression)

Well no, you said "You see the same mentality extend into the subject of this thread" which sounds pretty much like a blanket appraisal to me.

Now you say you haven't read the whole thread, which after your comments, one would have presumed you to at least have had the dignity to do, before tarring alot of people and comments with the same brush.

Welshwoofs wrote: »

PTN's what by the way? You appear to have finished your posting mid sentence.

Umm, looks all right to me.

Welshwoofs

gratefulforhelp wrote: »

The s is there because she has more than one purple toe nail.

The apostrophe is for free!!

That's not the answer; you don't apply an apostrophe to a plural unless you're going to indicate possession of something e.g. The children's shoes.

Lotus-eater finished in mid-sentence for some reason; I was simply curious what the rest of it was going to be *shrug*

Lotus-eater

euronorris wrote: »

Wasn't there a thread like that in the last year? A guy who had had an affair, and ended it, and was trying to win back his wife?

He got torn to shreds, but given some good advice too. I don't think he faired any better than PTN.

Of course not. In fact guys in general, I think, get a harder time on here.
It's not helped by some men who aren't too fond of women either and who post some daft comments, but more are posted by women.
That's because there are way more women on here I would say.

There's a good cross section of the community on here and a wide range of attitudes.

Welshwoofs

Lotus-eater wrote: »

Well no, you said "You see the same mentality extend into the subject of this thread" which sounds pretty much like a blanket appraisal to me.

No, I did not say that. I said:

You see the same mentality extend into the subject of this thread; affairs.

Next time try quoting the whole sentence and not just the part that suits you.

Umm, looks all right to me.

Really? I thought you said you were perfect.

Lotus-eater

Welshwoofs wrote: »

No, I did not say that. I said:

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Next time try quoting the whole sentence and not just the part that suits you.



Really? I thought you said you were perfect.

Wow, you're really splitting hairs now, I know what you meant and so does everyone else.

I think I'm perfect, doesn't mean everyone does.

VestanPance

Welshwoofs wrote: »

That's the thing for me - it perpetuates the myth that women who have a lot of sexual partners are somehow much worse than men who do the same.

You see the same mentality extend into the subject of this thread; affairs. You see time and time again that the female side of an affair has FAR more vitriol heaped upon them than the male. In fact, in some cases, there almost seems to be a mentality that men are poor, helpless creatures who get sucked in by calculating women who seems to possess the powers of Sirens. What's even more bizarre is that much of this type of rhetoric comes from other women! It's almost as though feminism never happened....

Complete load of rubbish. The arguments are normally directed at the poster, which on this board tends to be predominantly female.

A classic case of seeing what you want to see.

purpletoenails

northerner77 wrote: »

Question for PTN: did your parents have a long successful affair-free marriage? Same question please to your bloke.
My parent's have been married for 43 years - as far as I'm aware there were no affairs involved, although I suspect that my mum was involved with a younger man for a while when I was about 8/9. I wouldn't say they had a great relationship, my sister and I both got married in our teens to escape the bickering and atmospheres.(Needless to say neither of the our marriages lasted!)

His Parents divorced when he was a teenager and he has spoken more than once about what a difficult time this was for him. Both his parents have remarried.

Also, at what age did your bloke marry his missus? He was 29

Welshwoofs wrote: »

That's the thing for me - it perpetuates the myth that women who have a lot of sexual partners are somehow much worse than men who do the same.

You see the same mentality extend into the subject of this thread; affairs. You see time and time again that the female side of an affair has FAR more vitriol heaped upon them than the male. In fact, in some cases, there almost seems to be a mentality that men are poor, helpless creatures who get sucked in by calculating women who seems to possess the powers of Sirens. What's even more bizarre is that much of this type of rhetoric comes from other women! It's almost as though feminism never happened.... I have felt more than once that I have been heaped with more than my fair share of blame for the affair happening, or 'letting' the affair happen and continue, or for trying to lure him away. I also think that some posters feel that I am responsible for his families happiness, that somehow if I disappear, all will be hunkydory for him again. I have also been called derogatory names on more than once occasion. But I understand that this is how other people percieve the situation and are commenting on the few facts that I have been able to give. To be fair there have also been a lot of comments on his character, some I feel overly harsh, but again, nobody knows him in real life (as far as I'm aware!) so people are just commenting based on what they have read on this thread [/QUOTE]

I saw him yesterday - will update later this afternoon, sorry I'm not meaning to leave with a cliffhanger, but I really do have to go to work!

FatVonD

Welshwoofs wrote: »

If I were to comment on PTN's case I'd say it'd be really interesting to see if she'd gained half the amount of nasty personal comments she got if she'd actually been a man talking about an affair he was having with a married woman.

You obviously missed the thread from the guy having an affair a couple of weeks ago then

victory

I must have missed it also.

PTN let us know how you are getting on:D